Toxin

The moment Haewool recognized the man, his heart began to race uncontrollably. The dust around the man seemed to shimmer like silver, even though it was the same dust as everywhere else. The village women were busy gossiping about him, but the man paid no attention and just walked by. At first, Haewool thought he was an arrogant person, but later learned it was because the man was shy. He joined the waiting group and quickly disappeared from sight. The villagers called him Raonhiljo.

Haewool’s first impression of him was quite positive. He smiled often, which earned him points with the village women. More importantly, since arriving in the village, he had tilled the land, built houses, and trained the men with shields and spears, making them strong. He didn’t act like a boss, lording over everyone or controlling them with force. Yet, despite being older and much larger, the men followed his commands without question. There seemed to be some secret behind his smile. However, since their teacher had left, the man no longer smiled.

***

After finally shaking off the bothersome Muhyeon, Haewool ran to the usual place again today. Arriving in front of the largest and nicest house in the village, he swallowed hard and pushed open the door. The doors here were never locked, and at this time, neither the man nor the female bodyguard who always followed him around was present, making it a perfect time to sneak in. Haewool headed straight to the teacher’s room through the empty courtyard.

Haewool loved the teacher’s room. Even before, whenever he had free time, he would come by. The teacher never found him annoying, instead teaching him to paint and even sharing paint with him. Sometimes, when he missed the teacher, he would drop by suddenly. But at some point, the door to the teacher’s room had been locked. Once, while lurking near the house, Haewool had run into the man a few times, but no matter how many times he greeted him, the man never recognized him. That fact stung his heart, just a little. After that, he only stole glances or took long detours to avoid him whenever he could, except for moments like this when there was no way around it.

“Hello, My lord….”

He mumbled as he stepped down from the porch and bowed. He was fiddling with the lock, wondering if the door had somehow been left open, when the man came out of the room and they locked eyes.

“So, it was you who has been coming by. I wondered which squirrel had been here.”

He glanced at the locked door and gave a light smile. He hadn’t smiled since the teacher left. To be precise, he smiled as usual, but it no longer looked like a real smile.

“Was it you who broke the lock before?”

“…”

Haewool kicked the ground and muttered. One time, when he was desperate to get into the room, Muhyeon had broken the lock on his own. Haewool had actually been grateful to Muhyeon for that.

“I’m sorry… Ouch!”

Before he could finish his apology, Haewool’s cheek was stretched out like taffy before snapping back into place. The man let go with a mischievous grin.

“Don’t try to open it again.”

“Yessir…”

Haewool replied in a dejected voice. The man often pinched his cheeks or gave him a playful flick on the forehead, like when Haewool had drawn the teacher naked. He was always annoyingly playful like that. Without saying anything more, the man turned and walked away. Had he been about to enter this room, but changed his mind? Back in the day, he used to smell faintly of grass whenever he passed by, but now there was a slight scent of alcohol instead. That scent made Haewool’s chest ache. He wanted to make the man smile. Somehow, he had to. It was shocking how quickly he came up with this brilliant idea, despite being slow at everything.

“My lord… should I show you the picture I drew of the teacher?”

The man’s footsteps came to a sudden halt. His broad shoulders stiffened. Unsure of what to make of his reaction, Haewool’s voice grew smaller.

“Would you… like to see it?”

“No need.”

Watching the man disappear into the room, Haewool eventually left the house too. That night, he had a dream with both the teacher and Raonhiljo in it. In the dream, the man and the teacher kissed while Haewool secretly watched, but at some point, the teacher turned into Haewool himself. He woke up in shock. Upon waking, he felt more terrified than when the soldiers of the Baedal Kingdom attacked the Soojok village. This wasn’t the first time he had such a dream. If he told anyone, what would they say? They would probably say it was disgusting, right? The man, with his clean, upright image, would never want anything to do with him if he knew Haewool had such lewd thoughts. He might even be kicked out of the village. Haewool pressed his pounding heart, trying to force himself back to sleep.

***

After spending the whole day helping the neighbor’s aunt with farm work and dealing with Muhyeon’s antics, Haewool didn’t return to his hut until nightfall. He lived alone in the hut, but he didn’t find it scary or lonely. In fact, he liked the quiet. After washing his face at the well, he was about to enter his room when he noticed someone standing at the door. He figured it was Muhyeon lurking around to play another prank. This time, he was determined to give him a real scolding. But as he got closer, he froze when he saw who it was.

“My lord…”

His mind went blank from the unexpected visit. The man was leaning slightly against the doorframe, with the darkness behind him. The strong scent of alcohol filled the air, and Haewool’s heart pounded loudly as he cast his eyes to the ground.

“My lord, what brings you here….”

“Don’t call me that.”

When Haewool looked up, the man’s face was as cold as his voice.

“Don’t call me that.”

The next words that slipped from his mouth were hollow, like the wind.

He stared into the dark, his lips twisting.

“You like being happy, don’t you…”

“…Pardon?”

Haewool raised his head, surprised by the unexpected comment.

“The idea that someone would be happy in another person’s hands, that’s impossible. I may have been a fool, but I’m no saint.”

“…”

He muttered words I couldn’t comprehend, letting out quiet chuckles. He seemed about to collapse, so I hurriedly grabbed his waist to support him. Through the fabric of his clothes, I could feel the heat of his skin against my palms. His uneven breaths fell against the back of my neck, making me instinctively hunch my shoulders.

“Are you okay? I…”

I almost called him ‘My lord,’ but swallowed the words before they came out. As I blinked, the water droplets clinging to my lashes rolled down my cheeks. His gaze drifted into the air, then slowly settled back on me. The smell of alcohol wafted down from above.

“The painting…”

“…What?”

“The painting of Roha, show it to me.”

Without hesitation, I ran into the room. I frantically searched through the drawers, worried that he might get bored waiting and leave. When I found the neatly folded piece of paper, I carefully cradled it and dashed back. Thankfully, he was still there. Panting, I spread the painting wide in front of him. It was a picture of the master bathing under a waterfall. I had once seen it by chance, and it was so beautiful that I ended up drawing it unconsciously.

For a while, he just stared at the picture, his expression one of amazement. His eyes were dazzlingly bright. He… was smiling. He hadn’t smiled once since the master left, but now he was smiling as he looked at the master. At that moment, I felt something sink inside me. He was smiling, but for some reason, I felt like crying. Without even thinking, I hastily pulled the painting away and hid it behind me. His hand, trembling slightly, reached out.

“Will you give me the painting?”

Although he spoke to me, his eyes were still fixated on the picture. My mind became a muddled mess.

“No… no, I won’t…”

In a voice tight with emotion, I finally caught his gaze. I clenched my fists so hard that my nails dug into my palms, trying to stop my hands from shaking uncontrollably.

“I won’t…”

I shouldn’t have shown it. I was so furious at myself for being so foolish. I was so angry I felt like I might go insane. If I didn’t get away from here soon, I feared I’d start hating the master.

“No! No! No…!!”

Clutching the picture tightly to my chest, I bolted, not daring to look back. I rushed inside, locked the door behind me, and buried myself under the covers. I wrapped myself up as tightly as I could, trembling at the thought that he might break down the door and steal the painting. Given the look on his face earlier, I wouldn’t put it past him. I lay there, holding my breath, but he didn’t demand the painting, nor did he break the door down. Squeezing my eyes shut, I wished I could grow up quickly and look just as alluring as the master.

***

After that day, he gathered the village men and left for somewhere. A few days later, they returned, but out of the forty men who had gone, only three came back. According to the village women, they had gone to Deer Mountain to acquire weapons but were ambushed by the Black Martial Emperor. From that day on, the men carried weapons even when they were eating or visiting the outhouse. The village was gripped by fear, but thanks to his reassuring words, the tense atmosphere gradually lifted, and life began to return to normal. The women said he was a born leader.

Today, I didn’t go to the master’s room. It would be locked anyway, and I didn’t have the courage to face him if we met. Instead, I sat in the fields where the reeds had grown tall and drew the autumn landscape, but I soon ran out of paint. Worried someone might steal my supplies, I hid them carefully in the grass and hurried to a nearby stream to fetch water.

When I rushed back, a water gourd in hand, I found my art supplies safe in the same spot. But he was there too. He was simply sitting and looking at them—or so it seemed. It had been almost two months since the master left, but he alone seemed frozen in time. Should I just wait until he leaves? Or should I pretend not to know and take my things? My heart pounded at the thought he might ask for the painting again. But what made me even more anxious was his hand resting on the supplies, and the look in his eyes. I carefully approached, ready to snatch them the moment his guard was down, but his calm voice made me stop in my tracks.

“Sometimes it feels like something is clawing at me from inside.”

He touched his chest.

“I guess it’s because that person is suffering because of me. I wanted him to be happy, but at the same time, I didn’t want that either. Whenever I felt his pain, I was overwhelmed by conflicting emotions.”

A faint, dust-like smile appeared on his lips.

“But lately, I haven’t felt that pain. Maybe… Garon is doing a good job.”

“Who is Garon…?”

I hated myself for asking such a useless question. Despite my clumsy words, he smiled gently and replied.

“Let’s just say he’s my eternal enemy and my master.”

“An enemy… and a master?”

“Yes. When I face him as an enemy, I loathe him so much I don’t even want to see him in my dreams. But despite that, there’s much to learn from him. He suppresses officials and wields absolute power, but he’s a master at handling people. To be precise, he knows how to make the leader of a group or someone with influence work for him. Once he gets them, the rest follow easily. He believes that weapons are the key to a nation’s strength… or something like that.”

I didn’t fully understand what he meant, but I thought I could relate to his feelings. Wanting him to smile, but also not wanting it at the same time…

“My lo… Raonhiljo-nim, do you know what people fear the most?”

He turned his gaze, waiting for a response.

“It’s not the Black Martial Emperor or the war,” Haewool said, fidgeting with his hands. “What people are really afraid of is that you might leave us, Raonhiljo-nim.”

His eyes widened slightly. Every time he reeked of alcohol or laughed as if he might break, I was terrified that he would disappear, like dust blown away by the wind.

“You know, Raonhiljo-nim, you lost your mother, and we lost a home that was like a mother to us. So can’t you stay with us? Don’t act like you’re someone who could disappear tomorrow—can’t you become part of our family?”

Haewool kept the rest of his thoughts to himself:

Raonhiljo stared at Haewool with an unreadable expression before letting out a faint chuckle. The autumn wind gently tousled his hair. He, too, seemed to be deeply colored by the season, like a forest in fall.

“Yeah… once we stand on equal footing… yeah…”

A chill crept into Haewool’s heart. Raonhiljo extended his hand, holding the art supplies.

“These are yours, right?”

Haewool took the brush from his large hand. When the warmth from the brush transferred to Haewool’s hand, his heart fluttered. Suddenly, a gust of wind blew through, whipping at Haewool’s clothes. As dust got into his throat and he coughed, Raonhiljo abruptly paused, making Haewool’s heart skip a beat, thinking he was about to say something else.

“You…”

Raonhiljo’s trembling gaze dropped to Haewool’s chest. The wind had pressed Haewool’s jacket tightly against his body, revealing the slight curve of his chest underneath. Haewool’s face flushed with heat, and he quickly pulled his clothes away from his body. Raonhiljo averted his gaze and, frowning slightly, muttered.

“I didn’t realize you were a girl and handled you roughly. My apologies.”

With that, Raonhiljo walked away.

“…”

***

Today, the path to Yongjeon felt especially long. After working with the blacksmith all day, Haewool had finally found a solution to the water transport issue that had been troubling Suryeong. Haewool was heading to inform the Black Martial Emperor, who would have finished his duties by now. Suryeong was a tool that connected an extensive waterway from the river to the inland, but the previous attempt had failed. Unlike the Black Martial Emperor, who didn’t care whether it succeeded or not, Haewool had become obsessed with the project. After discussing the shortcomings with the blacksmith, they would propose their ideas to the Black Martial Emperor, who would redesign the blueprint, and then Haewool would draw it out.

At the pavilion near the end of the garden, the Grand Chamberlain was scolding Unsa and Usa. Pungbaek was nowhere to be seen.

“Our majesty left on his own, and what of it?”

Unsa, ever unafraid even before the Black Martial Emperor, replied with a mischievous grin.

“I told you we didn’t know, so what’s the problem?”

Unsa, with his jade-like face, had a talent for angering people. The Grand Chamberlain’s plump cheeks trembled with rage.

“Do you truly not know your duty, wandering the palace with that shameless face?”

“Our duty is to follow His Majesty’s orders. His Majesty commanded us to let him leave alone, so we followed orders. But if we’re scolded whether we obey or disobey, what are we supposed to do…?”

“Even if His Majesty said so, he must have wanted you to accompany him! He may appear strong, but don’t you know how fragile he is inside?! It’s your job to read His Majesty’s thoughts with just a glance at his sharp eyes! Why can’t you behave like a tongue in my mouth, always knowing what to do?!”

“A tongue, you say…”

Unsa and Usa both frowned at the same time. Then Unsa, noticing Haewool approaching, smirked.

“The tongue for His Majesty is already in place, so we needn’t bother.”

Suddenly, tears welled up in the Grand Chamberlain’s eyes.

“You don’t understand! Even though His Majesty has grown up, to me, he is still like a child left by the water’s edge. Who knows if he might fall victim to ruffians outside the palace or slip and fall from the eungryong? How can anyone understand the worry that burns within me? And yet… you dare, dare to leave His Majesty alone in this cruel world and loiter in the garden? If anything happens to His Majesty, I will personally tear you limb from limb!”

Unsa and Usa looked as if they could no longer stand listening.

“Please, by all means, do so. It’ll give us an excuse to rest,” Usa muttered.

“Did you become royal guards for your sharp tongues instead of your swordsmanship?!”

As the Grand Chamberlain’s whining showed no signs of stopping, Usa pointed to the sky with his finger.

“Ah, over there—it looks like the eungryong. Could His Majesty be riding it?”

“Where?! Where?!”

Distracted, the Grand Chamberlain looked to the sky, and Unsa and Usa quickly seized the opportunity to slip away.

When I returned to Yongjeon, the Black Martial Emperor was nowhere to be seen. I approached the court ladies standing guard outside his chambers.

“Where is His Majesty Garon?”

A middle-aged lady-in-waiting answered, “We heard that he left riding the

, but we don’t know exactly where he went…”

“I see…”

Riding the

meant he had traveled far. Recently, with the rebels growing more aggressive, the outskirts of the Baedal Kingdom were in a constant state of war.

“Did Gwuya go with him, by any chance?”

“No, Your Excellency. He left alone, without any guards or even the Grand Chamberlain.”

“…”

Since he hadn’t taken the elite force,

, it seemed there was no cause for concern. But it still bothered me—where could he have gone alone? Lately, the Black Martial Emperor had frequently disappeared without a word.

“Please, come inside. His Majesty prepared the meat in advance before he left.”

“Thank you.”

I entered the chamber, rubbing my sore legs. I had rushed here, eager to report to the Black Martial Emperor. After a while, the court ladies came in, and Ara brought in the prepared chicken and water. The way the meat was meticulously prepared was almost perfect, making me wonder if this was how the Black Martial Emperor sometimes quelled his violent urges. After washing my hands in the bronze basin and drying them with a towel, I was ready to eat.

The court ladies sat in front of me. In the past, we only exchanged necessary words, but recently, we had grown closer, and they often kept me company during meals. I had only recently found out that Ara was two years younger than me. But today, unlike usual, the atmosphere was awkward. The middle-aged court lady was always stiff, but Ara had been glancing at me cautiously for a while. No, perhaps I was the one being cautious—after all, I had had a seizure yesterday.

“I’m sorry about yesterday.”

It must have been hard enough for them to hear the moans of the men all the time, and now I had added my seizures to their burdens. I always felt guilty. The lady-in-waiting responded calmly.

“It’s part of our duty, so there’s no need to apologize. Cleaning up broken furniture is much easier than clearing away dismembered corpses. And…”

Her lips twitched slightly.

“Your noise is far more pleasant than the screams filled with the stench of blood.”

“…”

It took me a moment to realize what she meant. My face flushed with heat as I stuffed the meat into my mouth. A little later, Ara started telling a story. With a mouthful of meat, I asked her a question.

“A bet… you say?”

“Yes, for some time now, the civil and military officials of the palace, along with the court ladies, have been placing bets, some even with large stakes.”

“A bet about when I’ll be kicked out of the palace?”

“I’m sorry. It started as a simple pastime among the court ladies, but it’s grown into something much bigger.”

Despite her apology, her face showed no remorse. I sighed.

“They must really have nothing better to do. Why would they waste their time on such nonsense…?”

“Actually, we haven’t had such a peaceful time in ages. Even the royal guards are getting involved in the bet now. Only the Grand Chamberlain is resisting, though he seems tempted…”

“Can’t you stop?”

The lady-in-waiting scolded, and Ara closed her mouth, looking embarrassed. Naragaon Fortress was a place full of secrets, yet it was also a place where none were allowed. The ministers conspired to drive out the Imae Tribe that had taken over the royal chambers of the Baedal Kingdom, and there were rumors that the leader of the rebels was Raonhiljo. Even though everyone pretended not to notice, I could still feel the hostility clinging to my back. The unexpected story left a dry taste in my mouth, but I forced myself to keep eating. I had to finish the meat, or word would get back to the Black Martial Emperor, and then the court ladies would have a hard time. After finishing all the chicken, the lady-in-waiting stood up, carrying the empty plates.

“Then, I suppose this foolish servant, who has nothing better to do, will take her leave now.”

“…”

With a playful swish of her skirt, she left. Ara stood up as well, whispering as she followed.

“Even Mama bet three months of wages on this. Oh, and of course, we’re betting that you’ll stay. And please remember, my jade ring is on the line, too.”

I let out a small laugh, and Ara joined in. After the court ladies left, I lay down, waiting for the uncomfortable fullness to subside. The chamber felt cold without the Black Martial Emperor. I spread out the blueprint of Suryeong on the floor. The paper was covered with traces of my hands.

The Black Martial Emperor constantly came up with brilliant ideas. From weapons and armor to farming tools, he could create anything from iron. For someone like me, who only knew how to draw, it was always fascinating to see the structures drawn on paper come to life.

On the wall, next to the

, hung a three-panel portrait I had completed of the Black Martial Emperor. He hadn’t exactly been a cooperative subject, so it had taken me quite a while to finish, relying solely on memory. When I showed him the portrait after two months of work, he personally hung it on the wall. But he rarely glanced at it. Even when he did, he would just stare at it with an unreadable expression.

He had personally hung the portrait on the wall, but he rarely glanced at it. Even when he did, it was only with a vague expression.

The eyes, forehead, hair, and lips of the Black Martial Emperor… I had painted them with pure, unadulterated emotion. In the painting, he looked a bit more human and less cold than in reality.

***

The sun had set beyond the fortress walls, and still, there was no word from him. I couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened at dawn yesterday. I couldn’t think of any other reason for his absence.

The seizures always came without warning—while eating, drawing, lying in bed, or even in deep sleep. Every time I was with him, it felt like my mother’s spirit was watching over us. Each time, I would question myself as if I were vomiting blood.

Why am I here? Why am I with this person?

Why am I with this murderer…?

Before I could find the answer, everything around us would be in chaos—furniture, myself, and him.

You are trash! You are less than an animal!

Whom was that curse meant for? I had long since erased any thoughts of seeking my mother’s forgiveness, and I could never fully love the Black Martial Emperor. Yes, we were both filth, discarded waste on the streets. The Black Martial Emperor would hold that waste in his arms until the seizure passed. His eyes, full of intense silence, would tear me apart again. I regularly inflicted this

on myself, and he endured it with me. After the seizures, my body would be covered in self-inflicted wounds I didn’t even remember making. Then, we would return to our daily lives. But in that routine, I slowly, quietly lost my mind.

If I kept dwelling on these thoughts, my headache would worsen to the point where I couldn’t even stand. I left Yongjeon as if fleeing, walking along the stone walls embossed with auspicious patterns. The court ladies began lighting lanterns along the fortress walls.

***

By the time I arrived at the Painter’s quarters, it was completely dark. As I stepped into the courtyard of Byeolwon, Naro was sitting on the veranda, drinking alone. His face was flushed, clearly from having had quite a bit to drink. His only drinking companions were a dried piece of radish and empty bottles. Upon seeing me, Naro raised his voice as if to show off.

“Roha! I needed someone to drink with, and here you are! Only you could have come at such a perfect time! Come, have a drink!”

He shouted toward the tightly closed doors of the other Painters.

“Oh, and you passed the Painter’s exam, right? Of course, you did! Who else could pass if not you with your skills? I bet those who got in with mediocre talent must have felt terrible. And you’re the first Painter that His Majesty has shown such favor to, even allowing you into Yongjeon! Hahaha!”

As I got closer, the alcohol lost its appeal. It was because of the bruises on Naro’s face and his split lip. I didn’t need to ask who was responsible. I glared at the doors of the Painters’ quarters. As if it weren’t enough to ostracize him and make him suffer emotionally, they had resorted to violence. But perhaps it was inevitable. I knew all too well how cruel a group of individuals could become when they banded together. Naro scooted over, offering me space to sit.

“Are you okay? Did you apply medicine?”

“I patched myself up.”

“Don’t lie to me.”

“No, really. Someone brought me some ointment earlier…”

“Who?”

“…There’s someone…”

Naro mumbled, his eyes, now heavily dazed from the alcohol, looking at me. Normally, Naro had a resilient spirit, not easily broken even by the Painters’ harassment, but now, he seemed on the verge of tears. If it was someone who could make him look like that…

“Sir Pungbaek is more considerate than I thought.”

“How, how did you know?!”

Naro was so surprised he nearly knocked over the drinking table. When I sat down again, he whispered in a tiny voice.

“Ah, well, I refused, but he insisted on bringing it over and applying it for me…”

“I see.”

“Still, I don’t get it. He’s always so busy attending to His Majesty, why bother with me? The palace must be too peaceful these days for even the royal guards to have anything to do. It’s really uncomfortable, you know?”

Naro drank to avoid my gaze. For a while now, Pungbaek had been making excuses to see Naro—teaching him swordsmanship or commissioning him for paintings—anything to spend time with him. The royal guards openly mocked Pungbaek’s awkward attempts at flirting, but Pungbaek persisted, and Naro remained oblivious. I could imagine how much effort that stoic Pungbaek must be putting into pursuing innocent Naro.

“I see…”

I took a sip of the clear liquor. The deep yeast scent tingled on my tongue. After a few rounds, Naro finally collapsed on the floor of the veranda.

“I thought the palace was a paradise, but turns out it’s a living hell~~. I didn’t take that hard exam to be treated like this!! It’s so unfair! So unfair I could die! Hng, hng~.”

Naro moaned like a donkey before passing out. I downed the rest of the drink, then carried him to his room and wiped his tear-streaked face with a towel. He was older than me, but I imagined this was what it would feel like to have a younger brother. Naro had a way of making people feel good, so I understood Pungbaek’s affection for him. After using my last bit of strength to clean up and with the alcohol adding to my exhaustion, I couldn’t muster the will to walk back to Yongjeon. I lay down beside him, my head spinning from the drink.

Through the crack of the open door, I could see the night sky. Without the Black Martial Emperor, Naragaon Fortress felt like a place where time and life itself had evaporated.

***

Ugh…

I woke to the sensation of a heavy weight pressing down on me. I tried to shift my position, but my body wouldn’t cooperate. Breathing felt suffocating. My heart pounded in my chest, and the papered doors, ceiling, and paintings on the walls seemed to spin. Amid the swirling darkness, more vivid than the night itself, he was looking down at me. I was sure I had been at Naro’s place, but it seemed he had moved me to Yongjeon without my knowing. I must have been quite drunk to not notice being brought here. His eyes, full of anger, glowed.

“I told you not to disappear without a word.”

By that logic, I should’ve been the one angry.

“Where exactly have you been?” I mumbled, still not fully sober. The Black Martial Emperor slid his fingers under my chin, holding it between his index and middle fingers. The scent of grass from his fingers mingled with the lingering smell of alcohol on my breath. I whispered to him, uncertain if this was a dream or reality.

“Nothing happened today, right?”

“Nothing,” he replied.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

The Black Martial Emperor had a way of clouding other people’s minds, but the way he functioned was actually quite simple. If he made it through the day without shedding blood, I would praise him. If he brought me something from his hunt, I would eat it happily. If he gathered materials for painting, I would use them to paint. And if he expressed his desire without hesitation, I wouldn’t avoid him.

It was a straightforward exchange: whenever he did something, I would respond in kind. I only recently realized that this simple principle was what kept the stiff atmosphere of the imperial palace moving.

I wrapped my arms around his neck as if to praise him, holding him tightly. The Black Martial Emperor rubbed his lips against the nape of my neck. His lips, pressed against my skin, were hot. Perhaps my body temperature had dropped too much. After inhaling my scent, he locked eyes with me. In his gaze, a half-broken symbol of the Imae Tribe was embedded like a crack. A half of their white seal remained, a name inscribed in only one eye, a clear mark of betrayal. But his stare, relentless as ever, held me captive. It felt as though my mother’s spirit was watching us from over his shoulder. The alcohol still clouded my vision, making everything sway.

“…The portrait,” I murmured. I might have given the Black Martial Emperor a cruel gift.

“If you don’t like it… you can put it away somewhere else.”

The Black Martial Emperor’s gaze overlapped with mine. His fingers traced my forehead as he spoke.

“It’s not that I don’t like it. It’s just strange.”

“Strange, how…?”

“Strange, as in strange.”

“So, you mean it’s strange… how?”

“Do I really look like that?”

“What…?”

“Let me rephrase. Is that how I look to you?”

“…”

I hesitated before giving a small nod.

“Really?”

The Black Martial Emperor’s eyebrows furrowed, just like when I first showed him the completed portrait.

“I didn’t realize that’s how you saw me.”

Was I really that heartless…?

“It’s my lack of skill, Your Majesty. You’re much more…”

I bit my lip, cutting myself off. His steady gaze focused on my flushed face. The Black Martial Emperor’s fingers intertwined with mine.

“This portrait…”

Then, his dark eyes met mine again.

“I thought there’d be a monster in the painting.”

I opened my mouth but couldn’t find any words to respond.

“It doesn’t matter.”

His damp breath wrapped around my neck.

“Whether you see me as a monster or not, it doesn’t matter.”

As long as you’re here…

He muttered like a breeze, biting into my neck with painful pressure. He began nibbling on my hair, then biting down harder. I caressed the corner of his mouth, a spot I had torn open during one of my seizures. I twirled his damp hair, soaked with dew, around my fingers. His hair spilled over my face, and the kiss that followed was as cool as his hair. I touched my tongue to his skin, which was as cold as armor. Beneath the tough exterior, his flesh was soft and warm. His hands, now impatient, began pulling off my pants. The Black Martial Emperor leaned down, his tongue circling mine.

“Mmph…”

I gasped, pulling my lips away from his. I was conscious of the court ladies beyond the door. But as his rough breathing mingled with mine, I felt the drunkenness returning. He consumed my moans and lips, holding my hands to stop me from struggling. He pulled open my robe, finding my nipple even in the darkness, and began to suck. His hands gripped my buttocks and spread them apart. The sharp intrusion clouded my mind.

“Ah… Ahh…!”

“Haah… It’s so tight.”

He muttered as he moved his hips. Suddenly, he pulled out, leaving me with a fleeting sense of loss. But shortly after, something else slid inside, twisting and exploring. His tongue, which had just grazed my inner walls, now wrapped around my member, sucking firmly. I bit down on my fingers, struggling to stifle the moans. The Black Martial Emperor yanked my hips toward him, driving his slick, throbbing length back into me. His thrusts came fast and hard, and the sound that escaped from my throat was one I couldn’t suppress. His movements became more forceful. Our heavy breaths tangled between our mouths, and I could feel every vein pulsing along his length. Each time he rammed into me, my back arched off the ground. I could do nothing but close my eyes and let go of all sense.

Can I really protect Ara’s jade ring?

***

“…Why…?”

When I woke up in the morning, it felt like I had been struck with a blunt object. I tugged at my hair, trying to grasp the situation over and over.

“How…?”

I didn’t doubt that this was Yongjeon. No, it

to be Yongjeon. Otherwise, either my drinking with Naro or my night with Garon had to be a dream. But this was clearly Naro’s room, and here I was, stark naked… Sweat trickled down my back. The owner of this room was nowhere to be seen, and all I could do was scream.

That’s when the door opened. Someone entered, as casually as a wolf returning from a morning hunt.

“Your… Majesty…”

The Black Martial Emperor leisurely sat on the blanket and, with his fingers, combed through my disheveled hair. Soon, something damp pressed against my lips. Whether it was prepared meat or his tongue, I didn’t have the clarity to confirm.

***

Since that day, Naro had been blatantly avoiding me. Even though we met every day while working on the screen for the outer hall, he didn’t speak to me. It was clear he had found out about what had happened with the Black Martial Emperor. There was no other explanation.

Back in Imae Village, I had one close senior. His name was Moru. He had a single mother and lived modestly. That shared circumstance had tied us together as friends. He used to bring me leftover meat or innards, and on the day I was harassed by local thugs, he even gathered herbs for me. For someone like me, a half-blood Imae, such gifts were unthinkable, so I foolishly expected too much. I confessed to Moru that I had sold my body to Orumun.

After that, Moru joined the group of people who threw stones at me. It wasn’t that I was a half-blood Imae that he couldn’t forgive—it was that I had become Orumun’s personal plaything. Moru never mentioned the kindness he had once shown me, and he erased the memory of our friendship from his mind. That was my final gift to him.

As the sun began to set behind the mountains, I called Naro to the garden of the outer hall. Naro’s face was swollen, as if he had just pulled himself from a vat of alcohol. The awkward atmosphere made it hard to find words.

“How have you been?”

“…”

“You’ve been busy lately. Is there anything I can help you with?”

“…”

Naro clenched his fists and kicked at the stones beneath his feet. I wondered whether those hands were clutching herbs or stones. Naro shot a glare at me before turning to leave. Instinctively, I grabbed him. He shook off my hand and started shouting. His voice was hoarse, as if we hadn’t spoken in years.

“Why didn’t you tell me the truth? I thought we were real friends who could confide in each other!”

“Being honest has never done me any good.”

“Fine! Now that things are like this, I don’t want to pretend anymore either! I’d heard rumors about someone secretly taking a pretty boy as their own, but I thought only twisted nobles did that!”

“I never intended to deceive you. I just didn’t have the chance to explain, and I didn’t know how you would take it, so I couldn’t bring myself to say it.”

“So you just kept quiet and acted like nothing happened? Do you have any idea how shocked I was when I saw that scene?”

“Painter…”

“Enough!”

Naro paced around the courtyard, not knowing what to do.

“It’s not like you wanted this, right? If His Majesty had asked me to serve him, I’d have had no choice either. You’re just too pretty for your own good! But honestly, I was so shaken up that I don’t even know how to face you anymore. I don’t know

anymore!”

Naro suddenly grabbed my hand.

“Run away.”

“What?”

“I heard that the white horns and genitalia of the Imae Tribe are good for the human body and great for stamina. Since His Majesty was poisoned, his strength has probably waned. Who knows, maybe he’s keeping you close to raise you as some kind of health tonic! I did notice your horns have been shrinking lately.”

“…”