The Villainess VTuber Tears People Apart

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【Virtual VTuber Gallery】

[Broadcast] Isn’t this supposed to be your specialty dish?

(Photo of ham)

How is this your best dish????

[Comments]

– She says this is her best attempt at cooking ham, either undercooked or burnt.

ㄴ (Author) So, basically, she can’t cook ham.

ㄴ At least she didn’t lie?

– She’s ridiculously bad at cooking lolol.

– I had a bad feeling when Rion offered to handle housework…

– Why was it cooked for so long???

ㄴ She said she wanted to preserve the texture.

ㄴ Doesn’t she know undercooked food can make you sick?

ㄴ It’s not chicken; what’s this nonsense? lolol

ㄴ Processed food doesn’t work like that, lolol.

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【ㅇㅇ has donated 1,000 won.】

【Seriously, Rion or Sora should just take her in already…】

It was a little early for dinner, but as a maid, I prepared our meal to fulfill my duties.

Thus, today’s dinner.

A completely torn kimbap.

“Why though?”

Anna put her plate down and asked that question.

“Based on the viewer chat, it seems sesame oil should’ve been used. Applying rice grains on the ends also helps keep it together.”

“You didn’t do that?”

“They also mentioned that seaweed for kimbap is sold separately, but I just used the seaweed we had at home.”

“……”

“And if the rice isn’t sticky enough, it’s likely to fall apart. Since it was cooked earlier today, the rice was a bit cold.”

“It would’ve been weird if the kimbap hadn’t fallen apart.”

Anna grabbed one of the relatively intact pieces and brought it to her mouth.

Crunch!

“…What did you put in this kimbap?”

“Pickled radish, cucumber, and carrot.”

“Vegetable kimbap? Why didn’t you add egg strips or ham or something?”

“You’re asking the obvious. If I used ingredients requiring heat control, it would’ve been a disaster, don’t you think?”

So I deliberately chose ingredients that could be chopped and added without cooking.

I was a noble lady who had defeated many dungeons and gates. Surely, I had wielded a knife countless times before.

It was my first time using a kitchen knife, so I struggled a little.

【AuroraFootTowel has donated 1,000 won.】

【Wow, our Laura is so smart.】

“Laura-chan! You’re terrible at cooking!”

Anna exploded.

“Oh my, have you ever seen a noble lady cook for herself? The fact that I can’t cook is evidence of my luxurious upbringing; it’s something to be proud of.”

“That’s nonsense! No matter how you spin it, this is too much!”

“If you have that much to say, why don’t you try cooking yourself?”

“Wow, is this maid seriously making her master cook…? Fine! I’m sure I’ll do better than Laura-chan!”

And so, Anna left the room.

A few minutes later, Anna returned carrying two cups of instant noodles.

“You’re not seriously calling this cooking, are you, Anna?”

“On second thought, I figured there’s no need to suffer through terrible meals.”

So, we obediently ate the instant noodles, which had been meticulously developed by the world’s leading food scientists.

Instant noodles are delicious.

***

We were living under the following rules:

《1. The daily living budget for both Laura and Anna combined is limited to 30,000 won.》

《2. Unused meal money can be rolled over to the next day.》

《3. For health reasons, all three meals must be eaten every day.》

《4. All food purchased or prepared must be finished on the spot without leftovers.》

《5. Rion cannot be called for help. (The Rion chance has already been used.)》

You might wonder if there’s a need to restrict our living expenses, but I wasn’t acting as a maid to keep Anna happy. This was purely for the entertainment value of the broadcast.

What’s the point of ordering lavish takeout if I’m doing this to roleplay as a maid?

Punishments are meant to be slightly unpleasant for the person involved. That’s what makes it fun for everyone else.

Thus, we decided to endure a somewhat uncomfortable lifestyle for a week.

“…Wait, why do I have to suffer too? I’m the one who imposed this punishment!”

Anna protested, confused. But she had to bear the consequences of making a noble lady into a maid. She had chosen the punishment, so she would have to persevere.

This meant living on 30,000 won a day for the two of us—a particularly tight condition given rising prices.

With just 5,000 won per meal per person, dining out was virtually impossible.

So, one of our meals each day had to be either homemade using ingredients we already had or replaced with instant noodles.

“You know, guys? Convenience stores sell exclusive products that are ridiculously cheap.”

Anna held up a cup of instant noodles to the webcam.

“This is a cup of noodles from A Mart, and it only costs 990 won. Since I’ll eat this for breakfast, that leaves us with 28,000 won! We can spend 7,000 won each on lunch and dinner!”

“7,000 won, huh.”

I took a bite of my instant noodles and thought for a moment.

“I have an idea. Let’s eat bread for lunch.”

So, I went out for lunch.

Though I wanted to send Anna, I was the maid for now, so I had to do the shopping myself.

I returned wearing a suit and carrying baguette bread slathered with condensed milk.

“The price is 3,900 won. If we split this, it’ll cost 2,000 won per person.”

“For 2,000 won each, this volume is amazing! How much do we have left?”

“About 24,000 won.”

“Let’s order delivery for 20,000 won and roll the remaining 4,000 won to the next day.”

“That sounds fine.”

And so, we cleared Day 3 successfully.

【BlackWhiteDietitian has donated 1,000 won.】

【Didn’t you say you’d eat three meals a day for health reasons?】

【PEKitMarieAntoinette has donated 1,000 won.】

【If there’s no rice, let them eat bread.】

【WowIt’sRamen has donated 1,000 won.】

【What is this, some beggar cosplay? lolol】

【MarquisFamily has donated 1,000 won.】

【The honor of the Ducal family has fallen!】

Actually, we didn’t clear it successfully. How dare they mention honor in front of me?

“Let’s add a new rule.”

“Huh? A new rule?”

《6. Instant noodles are prohibited.》

Now that I thought about it, we’d eaten instant noodles two days in a row.

It’s not that I dislike instant noodles, but I believe they’re best enjoyed occasionally.

And besides, should a noble lady really skimp on meals to save money?

“B-but…! If instant noodles are banned, saving money will be really hard! There’s nothing as cost-effective as instant noodles…”

“That’s why we should make home-cooked meals with the ingredients we have.”

“…Who’s going to do that?”

Anna asked.

The “who” here referred to whether Anna or I would be the one cooking.

If I cooked, we’d end up with overly crispy ham; if Anna cooked, we’d get nothing more than fried eggs.

“I have an idea,” I said.

***

Inagika, unusually, woke up at 11 a.m.

“Authority God Update!”

The moment Inagika sat up, she shouted. Sometimes, even an introvert wants to yell a bit at home.

With her sleep schedule completely wrecked, Inagika usually went to bed at 4 a.m. and woke up around noon.

There were days when she fell asleep at 7 a.m. and didn’t wake up until after lunch. In short, Inagika’s days and nights were flipped.

However, on the rare occasion she woke up earlier than usual, it was always on a game update day.

“Ah… It’s not open yet.”

She sat at her desk with a pounding heart, only to find the Authority God server still closed.

It wasn’t a game that took the full maintenance time, though. It would definitely open before the scheduled end time of 12 p.m.

The only question was whether it would be at 11:10, 11:20, or 11:30. Only the developers would know.

She wanted to log in as soon as possible to roll the gacha.

She wanted to progress through the story, too.

Thinking that, Inagika stepped out of her room for a bit.

She made a stop in the bathroom.

Then grabbed a konjac jelly from the fridge in the living room.

“I really want to live on my own….”

Muttering this, she returned to her room.

Inagika was the only one among the 6th-generation VTubers still living with her parents.

Because of her reversed sleep schedule, she endured scolding.

Because she worked from home (streaming), she endured scolding.

Because she didn’t go outside much, she endured scolding about her lack of social life.

She was also nagged to travel and broaden her horizons.

Her parents weren’t wrong, but people tend to live as they always have unless they have a compelling reason to change.

There was no way her inherent lack of initiative would suddenly disappear. You couldn’t buy grit at a convenience store.

“…I’ll save up and really move out someday.”

Determined, Inagika sat back in her chair.

When she checked Authority God again, the server had opened.

But that didn’t mean she could start the game immediately. There was still the resource update and shader compilation to wait for.

The updates for both the PC and mobile versions of the cross-platform game were running simultaneously.

The mobile update finished first, so she topped up her in-game currency in advance and waited for the PC update. She only used the mobile version for payment benefits and purchases.

‘Now all I have to do is wait for the update.’

She could’ve rolled the gacha on her phone, but she deliberately held off. She wanted to do it live on stream.

However, perhaps because her streaming software was open, the PC update was taking longer than usual.

Bored, Inagika opened the VTuber app.

Come to think of it, how had Laura managed breakfast with Senior Anna today?

Inagika suddenly found herself curious.

“Oh? Still streaming?”

Senior Anna was still streaming. Would Laura appear, too?

She clicked on the stream, but only Anna’s avatar was visible—Laura’s wasn’t.

【Waiting for lunch delivery】

The screen displayed this message.

Delivery, huh?

‘Yesterday they seemed to be saving money, but today they’re splurging?’

She knew instant noodles were banned, but she’d assumed they’d buy baguettes again.

Then what had Laura eaten for breakfast?

After checking a gallery post and social media, she discovered that Laura and Anna had ordered budae jjigae (army stew) for breakfast.

‘…Army stew for breakfast?’

And they were planning on ordering delivery twice in a row?

‘That doesn’t sound sustainable….’

While she was mulling this over, the Authority God update finished.

The waiting room was already full of viewers waiting for Inagika.

Inagika hurriedly plugged her phone into the charger and pressed the stream start button.

“Uh, um, good morning, everyone…. I’m Inagika, an elf who has lived for a thousand years and a member of EYEAI’s 6th generation…. Well, with introductions out of the way, let’s get straight to the gacha…!”

-Ding-dong

The moment she opened the gacha screen, the doorbell rang in her house.

“Uh, hold on…. Hold on a second…. Um, it seems like someone’s at the door….”

Flustered, Inagika took off her headset.

What was this?

Was someone actually here?

She hadn’t ordered anything recently, except for a box of konjac jelly. That package had already arrived yesterday.

She hadn’t ordered food delivery either; usually, she ate konjac jelly after waking up and rarely ordered delivery.

Nor was she expecting any mail.

As she thought this, she checked the intercom and saw—

“What…?!”

Inagika couldn’t help but exclaim upon seeing the face displayed on the screen.

Ah… She’d shouted….

And the person outside apparently had excellent hearing because—

-Knock, knock, knock.

A light knock on the door, as if to say, “Open up already.”

“Ah, I-I’m coming…!”

Though no one was chasing her, she opened the door as if she were being pursued.

And standing there was…

“It’s been a while.”

Aurora, dressed in a suit.

Had she run to get here?

Her hair was slightly disheveled.

And in her hand—for some reason—was a plastic bag filled with ingredients.

“For two servings.”

-Thud.

The plastic bag was forcibly thrust into Inagika’s hands.

“I need two servings cooked. Can you do that for me?”

…Huh?