Chapter 61 - Star?
Translator: Elisia
Editor/Proofreader: SemiPickle
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A flashlight.
No.
A sparking electric wire.
No.
A lighter.
No.
A star.
That’s right.
Looking up at the sky, it must be a star.
I was on top of an old abandoned building, gazing at the stars.
The truth is, thinking I liked stargazing was a misconception.
It was just that I had nothing else to do.
There’s nothing easier than looking up at the sky.
They say people turn into stars when they die.
But that only happens to famous people.
If I became a star, even someone far away like Si-Hoo would know where I am.
I raised my hand and pointed at the sky.
Starlight seemed to drip down from the tip of my finger.
It wasn’t because of gravity.
In fact, even the stars just wanted to be free.
From the ones floating in the center of the sky to those barely shimmering on the horizon.
[10%]
“I see numbers.”
“What?”
Si-Hoo thought I was acting strange.
And it was true.
Even someone without a keen eye could tell I was strange.
“Originally, I used to see time in front of me. So I could time my drug use properly. It’s like a status window, but more of a timer than anything.”
He looked like he didn’t understand.
Even stating the facts made me seem crazy.
I understood.
[10%]
“But now, I see a weird percentage. It’s like… I’m in debt.”
I wasn’t very good at explaining things.
Si-Hoo still looked puzzled.
He seemed troubled.
It was probably hard to agree with me.
“I’ve always seen it. In a way, it’s like an inseparable friend. It’s been like that since forever.”
No matter how I explained it, it sounded strange.
Which made me feel like a genuinely odd person.
Or maybe I really had mental issues.
Oh, is that it?
It’s just that the world had gone mad, so I ignored it and moved on.
Seeing these numbers in front of me wasn’t normal.
Was this delayed self-awareness?
“Maybe it started after I began using the drugs.”
“…I see…”
Si-Hoo tilted his head back and looked up at the stars.
The starlight fell faintly yet endlessly.
He stretched his hand toward the sky.
Then he let it fall.
It looked as if something shimmered at his fingertips.
“Hey, did you know?”
A passage from a book came to mind.
“Know what?”
“I read it in a book: starlight travels for hundreds or thousands of years before reaching us. So the stars we see might already be gone.”
“Ah, I think I read something like that too.”
“So, I was thinking.”
“Yeah?”
Si-Hoo turned to look at me.
“I wanted to be a star too.”
“What?”
“You know… something that people could still see even after I was gone.”
That would be nice.
To have someone remember you.
“…You’re not going to disappear.”
Si-Hoo said firmly.
“But now that I think about it, I don’t think it’s necessary to be remembered. I’m satisfied with living a normal life.”
[9%]
Although I probably wouldn’t live a normal life.
“By the way, Si-Hoo, how have you been? All this time?”
“Me? Hmm… Not good.”
“Why?”
“Because I couldn’t meet you… Oh. I wanted to apologize for back then.”
“Huh? Oh… it’s fine.”
The memory of our last parting wasn’t exactly pleasant.
I think Si-Hoo suddenly lashed out at me.
Maybe he cursed at me? I wasn’t sure.
“That… wasn’t intentional. I’m sorry. It was because of a skill side effect. I should’ve apologized earlier.”
“It’s fine. I don’t even really remember what happened.”
“I’m sorry.”
Was there really anything to be so sorry about?
Was there?
I tried to recall what Han Si-Hoo had said.
And then I remembered.
“Oh, right. You asked me if I’d sold my body, didn’t you?”
“Oh, no, that was… I’m really sorry.”
He must have been curious about something that was bothering him.
“Still, asking a question like that…”
It made me feel a bit miserable, to be honest.
“I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I’m sorry.”
Answer.
So, did you sell your body?
Are you a slut?
“That, but if I had… sold my body or acted like some tramp… we couldn’t have stayed friends, could we? That would be too much, right?”
Si-Hoo seemed at a loss for words, as if his breath had been taken away.
Before he could answer, I continued.
“It’s fine. You don’t have to answer. Honestly, I don’t know either! From what I remember, I didn’t do anything like that. But… I’m not sure. Sorry.”
I felt the strength in Si-Hoo’s grip on my hand.
I could tell he was anxious.
“It’s okay. Everything’s fine. Really. No matter what happened, what does it matter? You’re alive. That’s enough.”
I was relieved.
[8%]
Actually, I wasn’t relieved at all.
The percentage kept dropping.
“I think I’ve seen enough stars. Let’s go hunt some monsters.”
That seemed to make the percentage go up.
“Huh? Monsters?”
“Yeah. Because I have a debt to pay off. They’re collecting interest.”
“I don’t get what you mean.”
Do you still not understand?
“Let go of my hand first.”
I was ready to go alone.
But he didn’t let go.
“You’re not letting go of my hand?”
“No.”
“Let… go.”
“Where are you going? I’ll come with you.”
There’s no need to hold hands to go anywhere.
“Are you seriously not letting go?”
“No.”
Why wasn’t he letting go?
What reason did he have?
A rational reason.
What was the reason?
I had no idea.
I wished he’d tell me, but he didn’t seem willing to explain.
Something felt off.
“My hand hurts.”
“Sorry, I’ll hold it more gently.”
I tried twisting my hand free, but I failed.
Han Si-Hoo was stronger.
[7%]
The number dropped further.
“…Hey, are you doing some kind of purification ritual or something? Is that why you’re holding my hand?”
“What? No, I just—”
“I’ve told you so many times that I’m fine. Why won’t you believe me? Let go!”
Only then did Han Si-Hoo release my hand.
“Sorry, I was just…”
WEEEEEOOO.
From a distance, sirens wailed.
From the rooftop, the scene was clear.
Multiple vehicles approached, and they didn’t look like they were here for peaceful purposes.
Some looked like fire trucks, while others resembled armored vehicles.
WEEOO WEEOO.
They seemed to surround the entire area.
Oh, I’d heard about this.
When dealing with monsters that caused serious damage, they brought reinforcements like this.
Along with vehicles transporting Awakeners.
They must be here to capture something.
A truly terrifying monster.
Hunting monsters.
Right, it’s just the kind of area where people don’t live long anyway.
Maybe we’ll stall it around here and wait for reinforcements.
Something like that.
The blaring sirens screamed on.
No wonder there were so many blinking lights.
What wasn’t a star sparkled.
I thought stars had fallen to the horizon, but it was just the headlights of vehicles.
Reinforcements.
Do we need reinforcements?
Normally, Han Si-Hoo would take care of it, but he’s injured right now.
So…
If I want to kill it for sure…
Kill who?
Me?
There’s no one else but me.
Oh no, this is bad.
All the monsters nearby are dead, and I’m the only one left.
So they’re coming to kill me.
Han Si-Hoo must have known this and held my hand so I couldn’t run away.
Using stargazing as an excuse.
“If you hated me that much, you should’ve said so. You didn’t have to pretend to be kind and hold my hand. If you found me so terrifying, so disgusting, if you wanted to kill me so badly, you could’ve just said so, and I would’ve died sooner.”
Han Si-Hoo said something, but I couldn’t hear it.
[6%]
The numbers disappeared.
I was scared.
Black thorns extended in every direction.
I couldn’t hear anything.
No, I could, but it was just a ringing buzz.
[20%]
Ah, I stabbed him.
I think I stabbed him quite painfully.
The percentage went up a lot.
An attack.
In other words, I attacked him.
Han Si-Hoo.
He seemed to block it, but it must’ve hurt a bit.
But thanks to that, I can repay my debt properly.
Clang.
“…Ice?”
My shoes froze to the ground along with the floor.
An Awakener did this.
Cheon Yoo-Hwa.
Cheon Yoo-Hwa followed us all the way to this abandoned building to keep an eye on me.
To kill me.
[23%]
I realized there was no need to hold back on attacking.
They were all enemies anyway.
I already knew.
It was wishful thinking.
That someone would stay my friend.
If they were really my friend, they would’ve come to save me by now.
At least one person would have come looking for me.
Black thorns quickly stretched out, targeting Cheon Yoo-Hwa’s neck.
But they froze solid before they could reach her.
And then shattered.
[26%]
Pain—inflicting more pain helps me pay off the debt.
That’s right.
This time, I created a black wall.
Bang.
Once again, it froze and shattered.
[30%]
I’ll pay off the debt.
That’s all I need to do.
Crack.
Shattered again.
I blocked the ice spear flying toward me.
Cheon Yoo-Hwa muttered something, but I couldn’t hear her.
Her face was filled with hatred.
Why was she angry at me?
I didn’t understand.
She was the one trying to kill me.
[33%]
I’ll pay off the debt.
It’s a great opportunity.
Once I pay it all off, I’ll be normal.
When I reach 100%, I’ll become normal again.
Then I can go home.
Si-Hoo probably dislikes me because I’m a monster.
If I return to normal, he’ll like me again.
Then he won’t try to kill me anymore.
Then I’ll be his friend again.
And I’ll go home with him.
“Hehehe.”
I was looking forward to it.
Cheon Yoo-Hwa shouted something, but I couldn’t hear her.
She pointed at Si-Hoo.
Si-Hoo.
He had collapsed.
What happened?
Did someone attack him?
What kind of terrible person would do such a thing?
It’s a scary world.
But it’s okay!
“That… That much will heal with just one dose of medicine.”
That’s right.
“In just an hour or two, all the wounds will heal! Don’t worry about Si-Hoo.”
Someone should give Si-Hoo some medicine.
Cheon Yoo-Hwa stared at me blankly.
“I know from experience, even if you slowly grind someone with a saw, they’ll recover. And, you know, thinking about it, drugs are really great…”
Even someone as incompetent as me could fight a powerful Awakener like Cheon Yoo-Hwa.
Drugs really are amazing.
Then what if already strong Awakeners like Han Si-Hoo or Cheon Yoo-Hwa used drugs?
Hmm, would they become even stronger?
Then why didn’t they do that sooner?
“Drugs are good…”
What was I doing again?
Oh, right, stargazing.
The stars were beautiful.
“I need to take some medicine…”
Who was I looking at the stars with?
Si-Hoo.
Where is Han Si-Hoo?
“Medicine…”
There he is.
But he’s collapsed.
Who attacked him?
……
It was you, you piece of trash.
Did you forget what you did yourself?
So why did Han Si-Hoo call reinforcements to kill me?
This isn’t my fault.
Since I’m not normal, it doesn’t matter what I do.
I’m an abnormal human—not even human, more like a kind of fish.
But come to think of it, canned tuna is delicious.
Then again, anything is delicious.
Tuna must be frozen immediately after being caught, or its body heat will cook the meat.
So is that why my legs are still frozen?
I can’t move.
I can’t move.
Frozen tuna…
Now that I think about it, I’ve never had tuna sashimi.
Because, as I said earlier, if you leave tuna alone, it cooks itself.
So there’s no need to prepare it, which seems convenient.
Which is why ice is necessary.
Frozen.
“Ahahaha…”
The stars were so bright that my head spun.
Huh?
What did you say?
That’s not a star.
It’s the light in an operating room.
Or maybe someone wants sashimi and is about to prepare it.
But I’m just someone who likes canned tuna.
Sashimi is a bit scary.
“Sorry. I’m not in my right mind; I’m in a weird state, but you understand, right? Thank you. So please, just don’t touch that. There are plenty of others, so leave me alone. Seo-Ah is kind and good, so please, just this once…”