Hope born of solitus

15th August, Saturday

... Impossible... Impossible, impossible, impossible! Yesterday was way too eventful! That was pretty much a sub boss right?! It's like I was a main character for a moment, and I ended up saving the day with a convenient wish granting device... Was it even real? Is it all a prank...?

No... The fact that I have no recollection of anything... It at least meant that my memory wiping curse was real, and all these other... Happenings, are treated with the same veracity. Today is a Saturday, my life is drastically different from the other Lastias because of this minute detail. I pulled myself off my desk, closing the diary shut. I rubbed myself against the chair, hesitant to stand up or continue sitting. I could give many lazy excuses like morning fatigue or muscle cramping from sitting too long, but maybe I was just a little... Lazy today.

What was jotted down on yesterday's entry... It was too insane. How should I face Arin and Sariel? Should I face them...? Despite all the indecisiveness, I came to make today's goal quite easily. I want to have some alone time. I want to explore the world with what little time I have. It looks like I have some funds at times like these, other than keeping track of the things I'm purchasing, my financial account diary also had tips on saving and advice on what I should use the money for.

Strangely enough, a Lastia must have left these notes behind... No, it must have been multiple Lastias, each leaving a piece of themselves behind in the form of wisdom... Well, however much a single day's worth of wisdom is anyway. I want to write a thank you note, but disregarding the lack of space and counteractive to the utility of a diary... It also lacks any meaning because it wouldn't ever reach the intended recipient. They're gone, and I would be too...

Maybe I could build a bulletin board in my room, so future 'me's could also offer their thanks and prayers. It's all completely worthless, but... It's hard to describe, perhaps there's some irrational and irreplaceable value to it. But I'm low on time today, so I'll leave it to tomorrow's me. For now, I'll leave two post-it notes on the wall. Before long, I was already at a transportation hub of sorts, I think people called it the train station? There were only 2 directions that it transported people towards, but at this station indicated on the map, it might lead to even more directions.

I was afraid of losing my phone, so I brought enough cash to travel and a set of warm clothes. I'm thinking of going as far as I possibly can, then leaving it up to the next Lastia to head back home. It fills me with unprecedented exhiliration... Well, everything I try is a first for me since I have amnesia, so technically everything is unprecedented... Haha... Maybe other people would envy me for being able experience everything 'the first time' again and again.

I read about it somewhere in the main diary, a Lastia from the past told us not to take offence to it. We might not understand such a notion, but it is representative of someone's supposed immense affection for an activity. Like experiencing a story book for 'the first time', that sort of excitement stemming from a suspense of the unknown... Maybe I can give it to tomorrow's Lastia on the return trip. There are paper slips in my wallet, meant to be instructions for her. Hopefully it all goes smoothly on the way back, I'm sorry if it doesn't...

Speaking of which, I don't know if I look weird or not... I've been getting stares here and there, I believe I went all out with dressing up. It was quite a scare when there was a map pasted on the inner side of my closet, and while there were many uniforms, there were a few carefully curated sets of clothing prepared for going out.

I'm thankful for whoever organised the closet, it would have been a disaster if I had to personally choose the right clothing. I got to say, the closet was surprisingly empty. On the right side, it was rows and rows of school uniforms, ranging from elementary school, middle school and high school. On the left was a sparse few sets meant for going outside. I picked the one piece dress because it seemed easy to put on, it was a shade of light blue not any different from the sky, but it had some cute flower and bear patterns decorated by a saturated ocean blue.

It had two wide straps that covered my clavicles, the opening at my neck was square shaped and it was sleeveless. It felt like this outfit would do well with a big and cute sun hat. I was afraid of losing things so I only brought my wallet along, it contained additional notes for travelling, my house keys and a travel card. Apparently the card was Arin's spare, and it could be refilled with cash using a machine found at any train station. I hadn't seen any of these machines since I was in a rush to go inside a train...

I was too excited and before I noticed, I was already on a train. Thankfully I informed Arin and Sariel in a group chat, and Arin passed the card to me earlier. She was really kind to do this much... I'm sorry, but I can't repay the favour. Another me will have to do it. I looked out the window and watched the scenery rush by, I couldn't feel the wind outside since I was in an enclosed space. It's strange. Even if my memories are wiped each day, I retain my linguistic skills and the common sense just sufficient to survive in society.

This sort of amnesia is incomplete? No, it is selective. In the first place the fact that it occurs daily is unnatural enough. It's an unexplainable phenomenon, it's magic. Funnily enough, magic while supposedly an irrational phenomenon, follows its own mechanisms. According to Sariel, magic energy exists everywhere, it's better to imagine them as something similar to air. People absorb it passively like breathing, then convert it into usable energy, finally they convert it once more into phenomena through their ability.

My ability is {Feed}, Sariel's is {Swap} and Arin's is {Barter}. My ability allows me to skip the first step of converting raw magical energy into usable energy. A notable feature of {Feed}, it was named by a previous Lastia as 'assimilation'. Another feature is 'ingestion', the ability to use {Feed} at a distance from my body, and be able to cover a large volume with it.

Hopefully I don't have to use it on this trip.