This Life, I Will Be the Protagonist

TingoAutumn Deer looked at BS-Rita, who was still examining the fragmented Dull Game, and said quietly, "You saw the first line, didn't you? Have you heard of this one before?"

BS-Rita was clearly dissatisfied with the item. "Heard bits and pieces," she said, frowning. "But it doesn't really seem like something that can contact a god."

TingoAutumn Deer pulled out another fragment of Dull Game. "You could try piecing another one together."

But BS-Rita didn't immediately take it. Instead, she pressed the capsule machine button and asked, "How many do you have left?"

Her eyes flicked off for a moment, distracted.

TingoAutumn Deer's heart tensed. Putting himself in her shoes, he suspected she'd just told her own pet to check the marketplace for Dull Game listings.

Just then, a message came in from his own pet.

"There's still one, but it's crazy expensive—over 40,000g Blocks. Can't use discount vouchers either."

That sealed it.

TingoAutumn Deer had made up his mind. He couldn't keep Dull Game, and he definitely didn't want another player to complete it. The five previously listed fragments had already vanished into unknown hands. One had been priced absurdly high at the exchange. Another had been lost during gameplay. Now he was down to two—well, one now.

Might as well let BS-Rita have them.

He glanced at her and guessed most of her Blocks were tied up in the capsule machine. Even if she earned over 40,000g here at the 10th Month Theme Park, he doubted she'd blow it all on a single fragment.

He raised his final piece of Dull Game.

"Doesn't matter how many I've got," he said. "I like single pulls. If I don't get anything good, there's no way I'm dumping everything here. You've got three seconds to decide. Take it or I'll list it at the exchange—it's cheaper than your garbage eggs."

BS-Rita cursed internally. Don't tell me that's his last one?

Outwardly, she stayed cool, even frowned. "...Do I look like an idiot? What good is a bunch of scattered fragments I can't complete?"

TingoAutumn Deer's lip twitched. He pulled out two Universal Fragments. "...What about now? That's four fragments total."

He already knew Universal Fragments didn't work on Dull Game, but BS-Rita didn't.

"It's acceptable," she said at last.

Before she could take them, TingoAutumn Deer leaned back, just out of reach. "One Dull Game fragment, two Universal Fragments. I want twenty pulls."

But BS-Rita didn't answer right away.

Waiting?

Was she stalling for more info from the marketplace?

That got TingoAutumn Deer nervous. If she found out the market listing was over 40,000g, she might call off the trade entirely.

"You know how much Universal Fragments cost," he pressed. "If you don't want them, forget it."

He turned as if to leave.

BS-Rita saw his foot shuffle.

She couldn't afford to bluff any longer.

"Eighteen!" she said quickly.

TingoAutumn Deer shoved the three fragments into her hands and spun away, hugging his capsule prizes and vanishing into the crowd.

He wasn't about to open those here. Not with a Divine Relic potentially inside.

Another player stepped up, so BS-Rita quickly stuffed the partially assembled Dull Game back into a capsule and—without subtlety—tucked it into her magician's wisdom tooth.

Then she turned back to the crowd.

A new customer wanted to pull.

BS-Rita paused just long enough to shake the machine. Only about 60% of the capsules remained.

She fished out several egg capsules from her tooth, each containing 50g Blocks, and tossed thirty new capsules into the machine.

Immediately, a wave of complaints rose from the crowd.

"What the hell?"

"This is a scam!"

"So stingy!"

"Garbage promo!"

BS-Rita ignored them all.

After the thirty new capsules were in, she dropped two more—each with a Universal Fragment—into the machine.

The crowd: …Well, okay then.

BS-Rita shouted, "Full Divine Relic inside! One pull and you're maxed!"

The crowd: Actually… kinda worth it…

…

[Private Demon Group Chat]

"What do we do, Dull?"

"What do we do, Dull?"

"What do we do, Dull?"

"Sigh… she just swapped it for a few junk capsules."

"And gave it to someone Dull doesn't even like."

"It's gone bad. The gods are freaking out about Dull in the big chat."

"Protect Dull!"

"Protect!"

"Protect!"

"Protect!"

Closing the idiocy chat, Dull stared at BS-Rita, now totally surrounded by players.

He turned to Fat Duck beside him and muttered, "...Can you laugh a little quieter?"

Deceitful Bloom snapped his beak shut. "Oh."

…

TingoAutumn Deer hadn't gone far.

He stood behind a vending terminal nearby, watching BS-Rita like a hawk.

After a while, a player approached him and quietly reported everything BS-Rita had done after he'd left.

TingoAutumn Deer listened, then walked to the machine and searched for Message in a Bottle.

Nothing.

The one he'd seen listed earlier was gone.

Did she buy it?

He searched Dull Game next.

Only that sky-high priced fragment remained. No sign of the missing one he'd lost earlier.

But instead of relief, he felt a strange emptiness.

The urgency he'd felt—scrambling to trade away his fragments—vanished, replaced by a slow, creeping regret.

He didn't even understand himself.

He had already decided to abandon Dull Game, but now that it was truly gone… now he regretted it?

He hadn't wanted anyone else to complete it—but he never listed it at a ridiculous price, either. He'd just let it slip away.

So easily.

Only after it was too late did the weight of that loss hit him.

Eventually, he exhaled.

Even a completed Dull Game only had one bullet. He hadn't found anything other than "Dull's" bullet, and it had to be reactivated after every use.

It wasn't all that amazing.

He'd made the right decision.

No regrets.

Closing the marketplace interface, TingoAutumn Deer rejoined his crew in a quiet corner and started opening his capsules.

For one Dull Game fragment and two Universal Fragments, he got 18 pulls.

Final result: 3029g Blocks, 3 duck feathers, one three-piece item set fragment, one five-piece item set fragment, and one event pack.

TingoAutumn Deer: "..."

He glanced at the huddled mass of players across the plaza.

Despite the pounding headache from his disappointment… he kind of wanted to go buy more capsules.

The prize pool was good.

It wasn't the machine.

It was just his luck that sucked.