Chapter 514: Cannot Stop Loving You
(From Blue's Perspective)
When I opened my eyes, my body still felt weak. A lot weaker than before actually. I had used too much of my power, especially when my body was still recovering. The fact that I had fought a freaking war right after giving birth was still surprising even to me. But, I, in fact, did just that. It was a story my son would have to hear a lot, growing up.
Ah, was he not hungry? I had fed him quite a long time ago.
I tried to get up and ask Ruby to bring him here.
And what about Dem? I was pretty sure he had talked to me, he had been awake. Did I imagine it?
"Slow down, my love. Don't get up."
I looked beside me. He was there. My so precious husband had been there, sitting on the bed, right beside me. He was holding Dion in his arms. Find your next adventure on My Virtual Library Empire
"… I am not dreaming. Tell me I am not dreaming," I said. My voice was shaking. Hell, I was shaking.
"No, my love. I should be the one saying that," he said and bent to give me a kiss on the forehead. "I am here. You saved me."
I chuckled and slowly got up. He looked weak, but at least, he was alive, very much alive. I kissed my son in his arms gently. Dion was sleeping.
"It was me who almost killed you too," I said.
"Did I say I care about that? If that was the cost I had to pay to live with you, let it be a small amount of time, I would still do it," he said. "I would still choose you."
"You don't know… I have poison in my body, Dem. I… I was dangerous for you… I killed you slowly. I would have killed you faster if I had accepted myself sooner… In that case, I would have gotten no time to save you," I said. "If Azure had not said so… You would have died."
"I was the only one too intimate with you. That's why."
"It could have been anything. My saliva, blood, anything…"
Dion started crying suddenly. Dem soothed him, but he did not seem to stop.
"Give him to me. He is hungry, maybe," I said. "Newborns need to be fed a lot, you know."
He placed Dion in my arms. I resisted the urge to cry as I unbuttoned my nightgown and placed my nipple in my little boy's mouth.
Dem was watching closely. "Dion… It's a good name," he said as he stroked our son's cheek with his finger gently.
"Evan named him," I said. "He had been there."
"I know. He told me," Dem said. "… I am grateful, honestly, that he has been there. I need to behave more politely to him, it seems. He has been there even though he could have walked away. Then again, if he walked away, it would mean the end of our partnership."
"Don't think that way, Dem," I said. "He is a true friend. If it was not for him… Maybe I would have just cut my stomach open and bring my child because I almost gave up… It was scary… I still… I don't know how I managed to push this baby out of my vagina and then get up and fight. I don't know how… It's just too… That time, I had been scared, Dem. I just hoped you would have been there with me.
I would have felt less scared."
He kissed me on the lips this time. It was a gentle kiss. Both of us were too weak to do anything more. Well, nothing was more intimate now than just holding hands and talking.
"You have been brave, my love. You have been too brave," he said. "Trust me, I never thought you would have to do all of this. I just… I thought I could keep you from harm forever."
"Well, at least, I can save my family now too," I said, resting my head on his shoulder. "We have a new member now. So, we need to be more careful."
"He looks like me."
"I know. When he got out, I just knew instantly, I don't know how," I said. Then I added slowly, "… He has your eyes."
"They look better on him," he said and shrugged. "I don't hate it, Blue. I don't hate him. I had just been scared, but now… It means nothing. I am glad we have a beautiful son. I am glad you have been brave.
And honestly, I am glad to be alive and with you… With our son."
I could stay like this forever. I was glad others gave us a moment of peace and silence, so we could sit together like this after a long time. If it were not for them, maybe I would have still survived and found a way to help Dem, but it would have been harder, a lot harder. I was grateful.
"Are you not going to ask me what I am?" I asked.
"You are my wife, the mother of my child, and the Queen of Querencia. What more do I need to know?"
"… What if I am a monster?"
He chuckled. "Don't you remember what you said when I asked you the same thing? I asked you to accept me even if I was a monster. And you said you would. That you would love me no matter what, no matter what a monster I was. How can you ask me that now?
You know my answer."
"Tell me then. Say it. I want to hear it from you," I said, almost pleadingly.
"Don't expect me to be the kind of man who would say you are not a monster. You are not like other monsters," he said. "Because I am not like those men. I will say you are a monster. I am a monster. Monsters suit each other the best.
Why would I say otherwise? What's wrong with being a monster when the monster could save her family, her people the best when a damsel in distress cannot? Even if you needed saving all the time, I would have loved you. Even if you are the most powerful woman in the world, I would love you. Damn it, Blue, even if you kill me, I would still love you! I cannot stop!
I cannot stop loving you, drinking your poison over and over again!"