SWNOVELXO Chapter 164
Chapter 164: Courage
Jeoksawol bit her lip.
Yeah.
She was the Most Beautiful in the World. A striking beauty that all the Nine Provinces and Eight Monarchs considered unrivaled. More than just the best, she was comparable to the legendary beauties who could compete with the likes of Xi Shi, Wang Zhaojun, Diaochan, and Yang Guifei.
Her beauty alone was enough for Jeoksawol to rise to the ranks of the extraordinary.
And yet, it was Lee Cheol-soo who had stolen her heart.
As she thought about this, Jeoksawol believed that it was he who should feel honored. The confusion swelling in her heart calmed down, and her well-honed feelings surged forth.
Yeomwang Jeoksawol.
True to her title as the Queen of Hell, an aura reminiscent of hellfire engulfed the grand hall. The black aura of the Heavenly Demon Technique was consumed by hellfire and vanished.
Hellfire burned in Jeoksawol’s eyes. It was the manifestation of Yama.
Seeing this, the Cheonma laughed.
“Hah, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! You’ve finally admitted it! Yeomwang!”
The Cheonma dissipated his energy. The aura of the Heavenly Demon Technique evaporated like a phantom. Jeoksawol followed suit and retracted her energy as well.
“Hmph. So what was the point of this meaningless exchange, Cheonma?”
Jeoksawol’s face was still flushed.
She had a crush on Lee Cheol-soo.
She was painfully aware of that fact. And at that moment, she felt her face grow hotter. To make matters worse, it was the Cheonma, not just some bystander, who had found out. How embarrassing!
Clap.
The Cheonma clapped his hands. His overwhelming energy spread everywhere. Through a spatial manipulation, a chair and table appeared between Jeoksawol and the Cheonma.
“Let’s have a meal first. Isn’t it dinnertime? Sit down, Yeomwang.”
“······.”
Jeoksawol’s crimson eyes turned towards the Cheonma. Without saying a word, she took a seat at the spot he indicated.
Clap clap.
As the Cheonma clapped twice, the grand hall doors opened, and attendants rushed in, carrying dishes to the table.
Steaming white rice and various side dishes were laid out.
And finally, a large bowl of braised pork spine, marinated in soy sauce, was presented before them.
Scrape.
Once all the food was served, the bowing attendants retreated and closed the grand hall doors.
“One must not neglect the hospitality of a great guest. This is my favorite dish, braised pork spine. Enjoy.”
“······I never expected to see Liaoning cuisine in Xinjiang.”
Jeoksawol pouted as she picked up her chopsticks, separating the meat from the pork spine and putting it in her mouth. The sweetness of the soy sauce mingled with the spices danced around her palate.
“For a Demon Sect, your cooking is quite impressive.”
“This is the braised pork spine made by the best chef of the New Religion. It would be impossible for it to taste bad.”
The Cheonma said while ripping apart the pork spine with his hands.
Among the few things that intrigued the Cheonma was this braised pork spine.
“So, I still haven’t answered your question. Cheonma, why…”
“Yeomwang. Let’s keep this secret that you, who have surpassed your youth, like a red-eyed boy. Don’t worry, it won’t leak out.”
“Why are you showing me such favor?”
“Because it sounds fun.”
The Cheonma chuckled lightly at Jeoksawol’s inquiry.
Indeed.
For the first time in a long while, the Cheonma felt a glimmer of curiosity. He was willing to serve her braised pork spine. Perhaps this was more intriguing than the Heavenly Body itself.
A first love that felt fresh and pure like the Heaven’s most beautiful girl.
The Cheonma was lost in such thoughts.
Jeoksawol’s hands trembled at the Cheonma’s gaze. It was as if his kind words were just an amusement for him to toy with. It was humiliating. She couldn’t feel more degraded.
But, at the same time, there was a strange sense of relief.
“At least I don’t want to be revealed right now.”
Not yet.
Not just yet. It was true that she acknowledged her feelings. But acknowledgment and confession were two entirely different things. Now that she realized her feelings, Jeoksawol could look back at all her actions until now.
The only link between her and Lee Cheol-soo was their concealed identities. As Jeoksawol, her true self, there was barely any connection to be had.
This fact pierced her heart.
‘This lady…’
The connections she built as Neungwolhyang and Yeon Sowol were all lies.
As Jeoksawol, her genuine relationships were thin as a thread.
That wasn’t the only issue.
If she were to confess now that she was, in fact, Hwa Myeon-ho-gyeom, Neungwolhyang, and Yeon Sowol…
They were all the same person.
If she were to confess that, would Lee Cheol-soo accept it? Most likely not. It was logical to think so. In fact, it could go the opposite way. Having deceived and played him with multiple identities, Lee Cheol-soo would feel betrayed.
Even if it were someone else, they would feel the same. No, if it were her, she might have even retaliated in anger and taken their head for such a betrayal.
On top of that, she was caught between the Orthodox Faction and the Demon Sect.
Lee Cheol-soo, as a member of the Orthodox Faction, had plenty of reasons to dislike her.
He might even hate her. They might never meet again.
Jeoksawol’s vision grew hazy. She remembered that day so vividly. Spreading rumors mixed with malice, only to find that he didn’t even acknowledge her.
The regrets, pain, sadness, and loneliness she felt back then left everlasting scars on her heart.
“I will never go through such a thing again.”
She couldn’t do that. She would rather die than drift away from Lee Cheol-soo. She didn’t want to separate from him.
She wanted to stay close. She wanted to be with him.
Perhaps even share a future.
She wanted to remain together. Regardless of their identities, she desired him. In a hidden retreat, she longed to be with him forever…
As those thoughts crossed her mind, the light faded from Jeoksawol’s eyes, only to return with renewed determination.
But being honest about her feelings was still too daunting. It was a dilemma.
“Are you worried about winning the heart of Goeryong?”
A voice echoed in Jeoksawol’s ears. Her face flushed with embarrassment.
“Hmph. Do you think I’d worry about such things? I am the Most Beautiful in the World! My beauty is enough.”
Looking coldly at the Cheonma, the one person she found hardest to deal with, Jeoksawol couldn’t help but feel the pressure of their equal standings.
As the leader of the Heavenly Horse Church, she couldn’t just use her authority to suppress him as she usually did. Being of the same mastery left her unable to confront him with brute force either.
Moreover, the Demon Sect and Orthodox Faction had an antagonistic relationship; the Cheonma had no reason to placate her.
They were in a place where neither needed to compromise or hold back—a completely equal footing. Yet, he threw a sharp remark that left her in a difficult position.
“Oh? Yeomwang, I’ve heard rumors that your beauty has reached the realm of the extraordinary. However, it didn’t seem to impress Goeryong, did it?”
“What?! No way! That can’t be true. Hmph.”
Jeoksawol felt a jolt from the Cheonma’s words.
Indeed.
The biggest issue was that her beauty did not affect Lee Cheol-soo at all.
That was why she had fallen for him, but now, attempting to seduce him with her appearance was a major pitfall.
In such a situation, fully revealing her multiple identities would be the worst move.
Right.
Instead, she should capture his heart as Neungwolhyang or Yeon Sowol. Then, when she had fully earned Lee Cheol-soo’s affection, she could corner him into a situation where he couldn’t possibly let her go.
That was when she’d confess. Jeoksawol bit her lip.
With that resolution, her heart felt slightly lighter. She took a piece of the braised pork spine with her chopsticks and brought it to her mouth.
“Right, Yeomwang. Wouldn’t it be better to hide your expressions a bit more? Even a commoner from the marketplace could read your feelings just by looking at your face.”
As the Cheonma ignited the grease from the braised pork spine with his Threefold Meditation, he spoke.
Jeoksawol bit her lip. Hide my expressions? She, the master of acting and deception? How many men had been fooled by her heartbreaking performance, enhanced by her beauty? If she counted, it could fill the entire ocean.
Yet disappointingly, she couldn’t refute the Cheonma’s words.
Lee Cheol-soo.
In matters concerning that wretched guy, she couldn’t control her emotions or expressions at all.
Like a genuine adolescent girl, her heart raced madly.
She just wanted to be with him.
That desire had grown so overwhelming that she could no longer control it. It was a feeling she had never experienced before.
‘Is this what they call infatuation?’
First love.
Jeoksawol couldn’t understand those courtesans from Hao Mun who discussed love with scholars or who threw off their identities to call themselves someone’s mistress.
She couldn’t grasp the concept of love itself.
Until now, Jeoksawol had never experienced genuine love, not once. Not from her mother, not from her master, nor from the countless men who could fill the ocean.
She had only whispered of her mother’s love, her master’s love, and the love of men. None of it was sincere. They all wanted to see her beauty.
Thus, she thought love was an illusion.
But.
It was not an illusion. Just the evidence of her trembling heart. Whenever she thought of Gaga, her heart raced, and just the thought that he might hate her filled her with dread. Memories of the times she spent with him made the sensation of his hand brushing her hair burn her skin with heat.
It was all.
Love.
Love was a living sensation.
Jeoksawol’s gaze fell on the Cheonma. He remained expressionless, his demeanor languid. A smile spread across Jeoksawol’s lips.
“Cheonma.”
At Jeoksawol’s words, the Cheonma reacted.
With a look devoid of concern yet tinged with a hint of curiosity. Seeing that gaze, Jeoksawol was certain.
“It’s only natural for me to lose control of my expression when I think of Gaga. Because I’m a girl who dreams of love.”
“A boy younger than you? Isn’t he a mere child?”
The Cheonma couldn’t believe what he heard.
Such intensity of emotion was a sensation he hadn’t felt in a long time. And he couldn’t comprehend it.
What on earth was love?
As someone who had seven wives representing the Seven Great Demon Sects through strategic marriage, and over a dozen children, the Cheonma felt little emotion towards his wives and offspring.
Being an orphan, he had never once known parental love. He learned his martial arts alone and advanced them independently; he had no master.
That’s why the Cheonma could not understand Jeoksawol’s emotions, which only intensified his curiosity.
What could be the identity of the courage that allowed her to call a boy forty years her junior ‘Gaga’?
“Is there something wrong with calling the man I cherish ‘Gaga’? Age is merely a number, Cheonma. You’re as clueless as a child. It’s like… it feels like I’m looking at the girl who once didn’t know love before meeting Gaga, just like you did.”
Jeoksawol laughed while covering her mouth. The Cheonma’s brow furrowed.
For the first time in a long while, he felt displeased.
He, the head of the Heavenly Horse Church, revered by everyone, was being called pitiful.
It was unprecedented.
Hearing such an insulting remark was a first.
“… Is love really that important to make you pity me?”
The Cheonma’s brow deepened.
Jeoksawol felt the same. This was also the first time the Cheonma had a conversation with someone on an equal footing with both authority and strength.
It was the first time someone dared to challenge him since becoming the Cheonma.
His wives, children, and the Five Demons all obeyed him absolutely, only engaging in meaningless discussions.
Even Mane communicated slightly better, but he too was utterly subservient.
Thus, none of the followers who blindly worshipped the Cheonma could become a true conversational partner for him.
“Yes. It’s not only love. The emotions of the Four Beginnings and Seven Feelings are sparse within me. I’ve never built proper relationships. You, Cheonma, are a flawed product. I was the same in the past, but not anymore. Gaga has made me whole. It’s sad that your wives and children, who have never received even a morsel of love, are left as pitiful beings. Emotion enhances life’s joy. The thrill you’ve sought your entire life was ever-present inside of you. So how could I not pity you?”
Jeoksawol grinned.
The Cheonma fell silent.
“Those who have been oppressed by the tyrannical laws of the strong may not understand, but martial arts isn’t everything in life. Masters and novices can still… form equal friendships and even fall in love. Martial arts are merely a part of a person. I suppose it’s like trying to teach a cow how to read.”
“… Merely a part.”
The Cheonma whisperingly echoed.
“A new perspective indeed…”
He fell silent. Although Jeoksawol’s words displeased him, they struck him as sharp as a dagger.
There was a point.
Because Yeomwang was not bound by the oppressive laws of strength, she could say such things. In the New Religion, martial strength was everything.
Yet Yeomwang insisted otherwise. Martial arts were not all there is to a person, just a fraction.
She told him not to assess someone based on their martial prowess.
The images of his seven wives and children flashed through the Cheonma’s mind.
How could they be so pitiful?
The Cheonma’s brow furrowed further.
“If you have nothing more to say, I shall take my leave. I have been well entertained.”
Scrape.
As Jeoksawol stood up and opened the grand hall doors to leave…
The Cheonma stared blankly at the now-cold dishes and empty bowls that remained on the table, lost in thought.
—
After sharing cups as brothers…
I looked at Saekma and said, “By the way, Saekma.”
“Call me ‘Hyung’ instead.”
The stunning beauty, Saekma, said to me. ‘Hyung’ indeed.
I sighed and corrected myself.
“Hyung.”
“Right, little brother.”
“Which tone is your original? Now? Or before the test?”
Switching between feminine and masculine speech made it difficult for me to adjust. Such details weren’t recorded in my school records.
When Saekma heard my words, she laughed.
“Hahaha! This is indeed my original tone.”
Oh really.
“Hohoho. Or do you prefer this speech, little brother?”
Suddenly, Saekma placed a hand over her mouth and smiled alluringly.
“No.”
I waved my hands in refusal. Saekma, seeing my reaction, chuckled boisterously again.
After a good laugh, Saekma, with her legs spread wide, stopped laughing and looked at me seriously.
“Oh right. Little brother, the Grand Princess plans to invite you and the other post-stimulation indicators of the Heavenly Horse Banquet in two days.”
“Is that so?”
I nodded at Saekma’s words.
The Grand Princess was the female master among the children of the Cheonma, known for her prowess. She was a girl expected to rise to the position of the junior sect leader in the future.
“All four post-stimulation indicators who will participate in this Heavenly Martial Arts Ceremony will be attending the banquet, so you might as well take this chance to engage in power scouting. Hahaha! Personally, I’m rooting for you, little brother!”
Hearing Saekma’s words, I laughed as I sipped my high-grade green tea.
The Heavenly Horse Banquet.
It looked like it would serve as a welcoming and introduction ceremony between the Demon Sect’s team and ours before the actual competition.
Yeah, it would be disappointing if they didn’t have a proper introduction ceremony.