Chapter 321 – The Cure Concocted!
All there was left to do was wait for Quella to concoct the Fairy Rot cure. Unfortunately, hags were secretive fae, so she kicked them out of her residence before starting. She would send word to them once the cure was made. Until then, they had to find time to kill in the meantime.
Kanae and Arenade were still trapped in each other's bodies. Quella assured them that Trickery should last for longer. They only needed to bear with it for a little while. Since the trio still had some time in Faerealm, they visited stores around Starlight with the aim of buying souvenirs. The problem was that none of them had any of this city's currency.
"Man." Kanae sighed. "Your body just doesn't feel horny at all. It's so… boring."
"That's because I'm not a pervert like you. On the other hand… kuh… A succubus' body is just horny every hour of the day. Does it stop?!" Arenade complained, deeply red and still pouting.
"Nope. I almost need to have sex everyday just to scratch that itch. Okay, talking about sex suddenly made me horny," she said.
"Don't you dare do anything untoward with my body…" The body-swapped elf glared.
Kanae put her hands up in resignation. It wasn't fair though, that Arenade got to have sex with the swamp ogre in her body. Well, at least they got to eat out a child of a demigod earlier.
They climbed up the steps to an elevated district that overlooked the lower western section of Starlight. It was quieter here, more tranquil. Grassy knolls and parks replaced the densely-packed sprawl of buildings below. Tiny wisps flitted by. One even flew right up to Edina's face before darting away.
The commotion of city life awaited them past the break in nature though. Buildings loomed over them again with criss-crossing walkways above. Endar slave masters barked orders at their laborers, which were commonly made up of satyrs, fairies, shackled beasts, and more.
Edina broke away from them and made a beeline to an equipment store called Drewgen's Stuff. A mannequin holding a signpost outside read, 'Blowout sale! 90% off all goods!'.
"I bet we can afford some stuff with a little bit of haggling. Hehe… Maybe they have some powerful necromantic items tucked away somewhere!" Edina exclaimed.
"Edina, we don't have a single moon shard which is what they used to trade here. You're telling me you plan to haggle things down from 90% to 100%?" Kanae squinted dubiously at her companion.
"Never underestimate the power of a squirreling who's lived her whole life in poverty!" She strolled right in with the confidence of a lion.
Not wanting to leave their necromancer to her own devices, they followed her into the equipment store. Despite the steal of a sale, the place was deserted. Not a soul was inside except for them and a big endaran man, probably Drewgen, with a curly mustache at the counter.
Weapons were displayed on a carousel rack, in which each end emerged from and disappeared into a shimmering portal. The same was true for armor on their own carousel. A large box in the middle of the room contained mismatched equipment, like people had haphazardly tossed unwanted gear into a pile. In fact, it wasn't until Kanae looked up did she realize that pieces of equipment occasionally fell from a portal directly above.
This shop seemed shady to say the least. Maybe that was what drew Edina here in the first place.
"Kanae, Kanae! Look!" Arenade motioned to her from a basket of bracelets, and she herself held a pair of bejeweled silver cuffs where one had a blue gem and the other red. "Seems like everything in here is enchanted. These are Bands of Bonded Fate."
"What's it do?" Kanae asked.
"Two people wear one each. Whenever the one who wears the blue gem-studded band is hurt, the red one takes all the damage instead. It's like a tank class protecting a spellcasting class sort of equipment. We should wear this. You like getting hurt, don't you? Then you should take all my damage from henceforth!" she insisted.
"Oooor, I wear the blue and you red, then see if you'll feel me getting screwed by monsters."
Arenade tensed up. She placed the Bands of Bonded Fate back in the crate and buried it underneath a bunch of other bracelets. The two wandered over to the armor carousel. While browsing through the carousel, Kanae came across everything from plate armor to tattered robes. Some of the stuff looked dented and dirty, like goods returned after a few uses. Maybe this store was that kind of place, a bunch of hand-me-downs, and the owner put them on a big sale in order for anything to sell.
Actually… It just occurred to Kanae now. She glanced at the robes Arenade wore on this body. Ever since they partied up, the priest hadn't upgraded or changed her gear. Meanwhile, Kanae and Edina had gone through several outfits already.
"Wouldn't hurt to peep on Arenade's gear…" Kanae brought up the character sheet and navigated to the equipment list.
Divine Raiments of a Saint: Raises holy damage. Raises resistances to magical holy. Damage against undead is doubled when using holy spells. Crowned Priest offensive spells are stronger and support spells are more potent. Healing spells cost less mana. <Redacted, no longer available without Divinity>. <Redacted, no longer available without Divinity>. <Redacted, no longer available without Divinity>. <Redacted, no longer available without Divinity>. <Redacted, no longer available without Divinity>.
Kanae's jaw dropped. No wonder Arenade hadn't changed her equipment. This was the equivalent to a legendary item! To think, she had this back when they started adventuring. Too bad most of the effects were useless since she was mortal now. Still, it would be nice to see Arenade in something new.
"Hm? What the…" Kanae came across a piece of equipment that stoked her brain juices. When she pulled it off the carousel, it was none other than bikini armor. They brought the literal meaning to 'breast plate' seeing as only two steel plates protected the chest. A chainmail girdle wrapped around the waist like a sarong.
"What do you have there, Kanae? It looks like an erotic armor that you want to try on, but I should remind you that you would be trying it on my body." Arenade folded her arms.
"Just for a little bit?" She inched towards the fitting rooms.
Arenade and Kanae grabbed a hold of the bikini armor from each end. Neither of them were budging, nor did they plan to give an inch.
"You already wore a bikini to the beach when we were in Kandis! How is this any different?" Kanae asked.
"That's different! Think of the time and place. I'm not going to wear an outfit like I'm going to the beach while doing quests!" Arenade exclaimed.
"It's armor! We don't have to buy it! I just want to see it on you!" she reasoned, but Arenade wasn't hearing any of it.
"Uh, excuse me! This store has a 'you break it, you buy it' policy!" the endaran warned.
Kanae yielded and returned the bikini armor to the carousel. Arenade watched her. But little did the elf know, she planned to grab it before they left. They met up with Edina who was inspecting a bunch of talismans behind a glass display cabinet.
There were talismans of all kinds, some made primitively out of animal parts and others made to look like the finest relic a craftsman could make. Edina's eyes, to no surprise, were fixed on one in which a skeletal hand clenched a black magic crystal. It certainly fit her aesthetic.
"What are you looking at that for? You already have a staff," Arenade reminded her.
"Every time I get my staff knocked outta my paws, I can't cast spells anymore. Well, most of my spells. I need something on me at all times in case I lose it again. Something like a talisman. Hey, old man! Can I check this thing out?" Edina waved to the endaran.
"You got it!" Drewgen unlocked the cabinet with magic and brought out the boney talisman.
When Edina picked it up, a surge of magic rippled outward. Armor and weapons on their carousels jostled a bit. The suddenness of it spooked Drewgen. Kanae and Arenade exchanged worried glances, because Edina didn't exactly have a good track record with items she obtained.
"What just happened?" Kanae asked.
"Fuck if I know! This thing just automatically attuned to me the second I picked it up!" Edina complained.
"Hold on. We can't have that! You have to pay for it. Since we have a blowout sale of 90% off, that talisman is going to run you… 10 moon shards. Cough it up, girl." Drewgen stuck a hand out expecting to be paid.
"Not so fast," the squirrely squirreling began. "We got something to barter with that you might like. As you may have noticed, the three of us ain't from around here. We have some goods that will really tickle your pickle, pal. Kanae, show him our merch!"
"Huh? Oh, those merch!" She rummaged through her bag to pull out a slime-made pocket pussy.
"Seriously. Why do you have those on hand?" Arenade glared.
Drewgen took a long gander at the fleshy tunnel while stroking his chin. He was ultimately not interested.
"It looks gross. I don't even know what it is! I don't want it. Give me back my talisman before I call the guards," Drewgen demanded.
Edina threw an arm around his shoulders. "Hey, hey, hey! You're a smart guy. Smart guys know a good deal when they see one. This is a pocket pussy. It's one-of-a-kind in Faerealm. No other like it. You stick this thing on your pecker, and it feels like you're having sex with an actual pussy! Believe it or not, the thing self-lubricates. It self-cleans, too, so you never have to worry about getting a disease from not washing it, ya lazy bastard! You know what the best part is? You get all the joys of fucking a fine pussy… without all the pains of putting up with a nagging wife you're going to end up divorcing after 20 years. You know what will stay with you after 20 years? This magical pocket pussy, still tighter than a freshly bloomed poon. And it can be yours, if you just part with a measly talisman that's already attuned to me anyway."
"In that case… You have a deal." He gulped hard and shook her hand.
Kanae was taken aback, shocked beyond belief that Edina managed to sell it like a professional door-to-door salesman. Drewgen snatched it off her hands and slunk back behind the counter. The shuffle of clothing sounded like he was fiddling with his pants. He made eye-contact with them, panicked, and retreated behind a door for privacy. Soon, the wet squelching sounds of Drewgen pleasuring himself could be heard.
"That better not have been the one molded from mine," Arenade said.
"Er… I only ever carry yours around with me," Kanae reluctantly confessed.
Pouting, Arenade wrapped her hands around Kanae's throat again.
"Arenade… Stop… you're only choking… yourself…" Kanae croaked.
With Drewgen gone into the back, Edina's kleptomaniacal tendencies came out in full force. He hadn't locked the cabinet, so she scooped a bunch of talismans into her satchel. They hurried out of the store, but not before Kanae nabbed the bikini armor without Arenade's knowledge.
When they emerged from the store, a flying quill flew right up to them. It scribbled colorful words in the air, informing them that Quella was done. They hurried back to the tent, where the hag was standing above the cauldron with a vial containing rainbow liquid. The cure for Fairy Rot. She handed it to Kanae, who closed her fingers over the glass container warm from the contents within.
"You will want to amend this into the soil and water thoroughly. The Kh'shanti roots will grow out to reach the cure. That's it!" Quella smiled.
"What about us? When are we changing back? I want my divine body back before Kanae starts having sex with monsters. Before I start having sex with monsters!" Arenade complained.
"Are you finally starting to understand the joys of monster dicks?" Kanae gasped.
"NO!" she yelled, loud enough to make them squeeze their ears shut.
"Th-That's strange," the hag stammered. "It should be wearing off any second now!"
As if on cue, the next moment Kanae blinked she was back in her own body. All of the natural horniness and urge to be taken roughly, drain, and seek pleasure returned. She didn't feel the intense need to lord over anyone.
On that note, Arenade was also back—
"Ahhh, me! How I've missed this superior body of mine!" Arenade held herself dearly.
"Sheesh. You high elves really love yourselves, don't you?" Edina groaned.
"Well, now that we have what we were looking for, I think it's about time we head home. Quella, can you do us one last favor and bring us to the Porupo village west of Starlight?" Kanae asked.
"That may or may not incur another Trickery!" Quella cautioned.
"What was that?" The high elf, who didn't want to be body swapped with a succubus again, grabbed the hag's collar and threatened her with a holy shock of magic.
"Just kidding! Just kidding! I'll gladly bring you there free of charge!" she cried.
They teleported to the Porupo tribe, and the tiny boob-worshiping gremlins rejoiced over their goddess' return, only to be disappointed once more to learn she was leaving again.
The party was able to retrace their steps thanks to Edina leaving behind undead corpses. Their bones littered the ground and led right back to the Rift embedded into the tree. Quella accompanied them right up to the portal but dared not come any closer. Arenade wanted nothing to do with the place, so she threw herself in first. Edina followed suit, waving goodbye to their hag friend.
"We couldn't have done it without you, Quella. It's thanks to you that our Kh'shanti is going to survive." Kanae smiled.
"Hehe. It's not a problem! If you ever visit Faerealm again, I'll be happy to be your guide! I know I'm a young hag and no one wants to lay eyes on me, but you treated me so kindly. I hope we can stay friends," Quella said, passionately shaking Kanae's hands.
If Quella was considered ugly in hag culture, Kanae hoped all hags were just as ugly. She entered the Rift and was immediately consumed in darkness. A second later, a force spat her out into the floor of the Eminence of Sin Church in the Talahurah Branch.
A whole clergy of Sisters of Sin were leaning over Kanae when she opened her eyes. They helped her up and dusted her off. The Glentir's Rift portal had closed.
"Welcome back, Queen Kanae! How was the Rift? High Priestess Arenade won't tell me a thing." Erin frowned.
"It was certainly different," Kanae said.
The bright and early morning sun greeted them with rays of light when they came out of the church. Kanae, Arenade, and Edina flew to where the Kh'shanti had been planted into— at the sanded down base of the original great tree. She sprinkled the Fairy Rot cure around the young plant, then called for nearby laborers to rake the liquid into the soil.
A mage adventurer offered his services, conjuring a localized storm to rain on the seedling. To everyone's surprise, the Kh'shanti was beginning to look better right away. The leaves stiffened. The unsightly spots healed up. It even grew a few inches, and the stem hardened to a bark-like surface.
Celebrations erupted as word traveled across the city that the Kh'shanti seedling was thriving. Talahurah citizens ignited bonfires and brought out large game to roast over the flames. Bottles of wine, liquor, and champagne popped open. Quella' Fairy Rot worked, and the journey into Faerealm wasn't for nothing. There was one last thing Kanae needed to do though. While people were rejoicing all around her, she brought out the oval green gem that Demigoddess Gaea had given them.
Now, it was time for Kanae to hold up her end of the bargain. Using her hands, she dug a small hole next to the Kh'shanti seedling and buried the gem in it.
"There better not be any funny business associated with this, Gaea." Kanae got up and brushed the dirt from her hands.
"Kanae! Look, Sheeba just gave us a 70 year-old whiskey aged in a barrel made of Kh'shanti wood! I can't wait… hehehe… Let's drink it now!" Arenade rubbed her face against the cask.
"What happened to watching your weight and giving up drinking?" She rolled her eyes.
"Wait, you guys can't go drinking yet!" Edina put an arm around each of their shoulders. "I need your help to make my soul cairn, remember?"
Arenade pulled her aside and whispered, "I know where they keep a storage of honey-glazed nuts."
"The soul cairn can wait then." The squirreling wiped the drool from her chin.
Kanae was about to sneak away to find her own fun until her friends hooked an arm each and dragged her along.