Naruto: Paws and Whiskers

The Sandaime felt a pang of heartache as he looked at the bill.

This wasn't coming out of the village coffers, this was coming purely out of his own pocket. Fortunately, Tsunade had shown some restraint and stopped after losing a considerable amount. If she'd truly lost her mind and gambled away a fortune, there wouldn't have been much the Sandaime could do.

He couldn't just ignore it. The casino operated legally within the village, it was a long-established business, dating back to the First Hokage's time. He couldn't simply shut it down.

If she had lost too much, the village would have had to cover Tsunade's debt and then instruct the owner to ban her from the premises.

'What else can I do?' he sighed inwardly.

"Meow... " 

'Oh, right.'

The sudden appearance of the black cat on his desk startled the Sandaime so much his hand twitched in instinct reaching for his hidden kunai, causing him to miswrite a character. He looked up, completely bewildered.

'What's he trying to do? Can't I get any work done? Also, when did this creature place a Flying Thunder God mark on my desk? I didn't even notice...'

"That Ebisu is a bit stuffy, meow~" Takeshi commented, appearing thoughtful, "but his mind isn't exactly pure. Still, with the right Sensei, he could become quite talented."

Takeshi didn't elaborate, but the Sandaime understood the implication.

"Ebisu?" The Sandaime considered this for a moment, then nodded. According to the Academy's assessment, Ebisu was very smart. His theoretical grades, kunai throwing, and hand seal execution speed were all excellent, only his taijutsu was lacking. If Might Guy taught him Taijutsu, the boy would probably be ruined.

If Might Guy were to teach him, the kid would probably be ruined.

What Takeshi didn't say, however, was that in his opinion, only two people in the village were truly suited to teach Ebisu: Hiruzen himself, and Jiraiya, with Hiruzen being the most suitable. They were kindred spirits, in a way. Perhaps that's why Ebisu would eventually be invited to the Sarutobi household as a tutor, a perfect match.

The Sandaime glanced at the cat, certain he was up to something, but his immediate concern wasn't the cat's schemes, it was the three Genin. So, he pressed on, "What about Genma Shiranui?"

"He's alright," Takeshi replied. "But he needs a decisive finishing jutsu, ideally one involving thrown weapons, to compensate for his lower offensive power."

Takeshi offered its suggestion, the hint quite clear. Surely the Hokage would understand. With that, the cat stopped talking and began wandering around the Hokage's Office as if he owned the place.

'I need to send this cat back soon. It's getting on my nerves.' The Sandaime watched the cat prowl around his office and sighed inwardly. 'The cat is strong,' he conceded mentally, 'and quite intelligent... but his personality is a real problem.'

However, setting his annoyance aside, he reviewed the information on Guy's team. Ultimately, he had to admit Takeshi's assessment was accurate, hitting the nail right on the head.

'Teach them ninjutsu?' he mused. 'They're still quite young.' They likely lacked the chakra reserves and control required for many techniques. However, the Sandaime already had an idea for a jutsu that might suit Genma. 'Shuriken Shadow Clone Jutsu...' It could be used with various throwing weapons, though it was most effective with the large Fuma Shuriken. 'It is an A-rank jutsu, though. He'll need practice.'

According to Minato, Takeshi had helped look after Kakashi and Obito back at the Northern Camp, so he probably wouldn't cause too much trouble supervising a Genin team. 

The Sandaime trusted Minato deeply, perhaps even more than his own student, Jiraiya. If Minato vouched for Takeshi's capability in this regard, then it must be true.

Takeshi, of course, was unaware of this. If he had known Minato was responsible for his current babysitting duties in Konoha, he would likely try to beat him to a pulp. Strength difference? Both used the Flying Thunder God technique, and Takeshi felt he had more efficient version. Who would he be afraid?

'There's nothing interesting in the Hokage's Office,' Takeshi thought. 'The only reason I'm sticking around is to rack up some Points off the old man. I've already netted over a thousand since I got here.' Right now, Takeshi craved every point it could get, hundreds, thousands, even just tens. 'There are so many jutsu waiting in the purchase list, but my funds are pitifully low.'

He tried stirring up a little more trouble, but Sandaime's composure didn't crack, and the Point counter remained stubbornly still.

'Figures,' Takeshi mused. 'A veteran Hokage like him has top-tier composure. I'd call him the most patient Hokage ever. Well, no use sticking around. Time to go.'

Takeshi wasn't exactly idle. He had seen the state Guy and the others were in from the rooftop earlier. Stuck in the office, he was essentially blind to their progress, only able to guess based on when Guy might run past. 

The real concern was Guy's single-mindedness. What if Genma and the 'Closet Pervert'-Ebisu-were already exhausted to the point of needing medical attention? If Guy kept dragging them along, someone might actually collapse. 

'Running can kill people,' Takeshi reminded himself. 'Judging by the time, they should be wrapping up soon.'

Takeshi didn't waste any more time. He gave a dismissive wave of his paw towards the Sandaime and vanished using the Flying Thunder God, reappearing instantly beside Ebisu.

Ebisu, however, was a complete mess.

Clutching weakly at Guy's hand, he muttered feebly, "Don't... run... can't... anymore..." His glasses had slipped down his nose, and his eyes looked ready to roll back into his head.

'Doesn't Genma know how to get him to stop?' Takeshi thought, annoyed. He glanced over, 'wow'. Genma was also being dragged along by Guy. Genma was faring slightly better than Ebisu, still upright and technically running, though he looked practically delirious.

The only one still bursting with energy, predictably, was Guy.

"Stop!" Takeshi shouted immediately.

Startled by Takeshi's voice, Guy snapped to attention, stopping abruptly and standing ramrod straight. "Yes, sir!"

*Thump!* 

Guy stopped, but the momentum carried the rubber-legged Genma forward. Released from Guy's grip, he stumbled and collapsed onto the ground.

'Honestly...' Takeshi sighed softly, then waved a paw dismissively. "Go get some water. Be quick about it. If you're slow, I'll tie your legs together and make you run five hundred laps around Konoha upside down."

"Yes!" Guy took off immediately, heading for a known water source. His experience with the village's low-level 'errand' missions meant he knew the surrounding area like the back of his hand.

Takeshi glanced sideways and sighed helplessly. 'No help for it, time to spend some Points.'

He used some Points for a packet of special cat food, divided it in two, and offered some first to the badly flagging Ebisu, then to Genma. Genma managed to chew on his own, but Ebisu was barely conscious. Waiting for Guy wasn't an option right now. 

Takeshi focused his chakra, condensing moisture from the air into a trickle of water, which he carefully poured into Ebisu's mouth. He briefly considered using a Wind Release Bullet to force it down but thought better of it.

Ebisu's first words upon regaining awareness, "Did I... did I just run myself to death?", made Takeshi want to snicker, while Genma felt a wave of shared misery. Kami knew neither of them had ever pushed themselves this hard physically. Being dragged along by Guy mid-run, both had genuinely thought they might actually die.

"Not while I'm here, you won't. Meow." Takeshi nonchalantly licked a paw, then glanced at Genma, who was now sitting up and resting, clearly recovered somewhat.

Genma, learning his lesson, immediately sat up straighter when Takeshi looked his way but kept his mouth shut. He'd learned the hard way about the trouble his mouth could cause, if he hadn't spoken up earlier, he wouldn't be in this mess.

'Still,' Genma mused, 'as exhausting as it was, the running had to be effective. Covering that distance surely builds stamina, and whatever that stuff Takeshi Sensei gave us worked faster than any military ration pill I've ever had.' He looked at Takeshi curiously.

"Special blend," Takeshi said airily. "Restores stamina quickly. Meow."

'This cat wasn't just running us ragged, he seemed prepared,' Genma realized with growing admiration. 'Amazing. No wonder he went from a stray kitten to a Jonin-level powerhouse in under a year.'

"Takeshi-sensei," Ebisu began, now more coherent, his mind holding a vague, confusing memory. "Just now... did you pry open my mouth and pour water in?" His consciousness had been too fuzzy to be sure.

"Just some water I conjured up," Takeshi fibbed easily. "That, and the food, helps restore chakra. Meow." He didn't really care if they believed the casual lie. They were his subordinates now, he could basically do as he pleased, as long as he didn't actually harm them.

Moments later, Might Guy sprinted back into view, carrying a large wooden bucket. He was impressively fast. 'Although,' Takeshi noted inwardly, 'that bucket is unnecessarily large. He could have picked a smaller one, nothing beats a small cozy bucket...'

Takeshi watched him approach. As Guy drew near, he gave a nod of satisfaction. "Very good. Meow. Drink up if you need to. We're running again soon."

"Still running?!" Genma and Ebisu blanched.

"Meow? Are you complaining?" Takeshi tilted his head. "Guy runs far more than you, and he's not saying anything. He'll be carrying the bucket this time... unless one of you wants to?" His gaze swept over the two exhausted Genin.

"No, no! We'll run, we'll run!" Genma quickly agreed, desperate to avoid lugging that bucket.

Guy, meanwhile, seemed oblivious to the implied threat, scratching the back of his head earnestly. "It's alright, Takeshi-sensei! This water isn't heavy. I can carry it!"

'What a freak,' Genma sighed inwardly. Comparisons really put things in perspective. He'd always privately looked down on Guy a bit, but after experiencing this training firsthand, he was utterly convinced. 'Anyone who can endure this kind of hellish training daily... of course his taijutsu is strong!'

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