My Perfect Apocalyptic Life

Inside Xiaojun Supermarket, Meng Xu sat, looking at the already looted store. He picked up a bottle of iced tea, took a sip, spat it out, and cursed, “Horse piss, why isn’t it chilled?” He then fell into deep depression and contemplation.

Not far from the door lay Liu Xiaojun, the employee, knocked to the ground with all his limbs broken.

From the small warehouse in the supermarket, there seemed to be other noises, likely other zombies, but Meng Xu couldn’t be bothered. His mind was on something else.

“Employees these days are too unruly, even daring to attack their boss.”

Meng Xu sighed, realizing his earlier thoughts were too simplistic. Employees aren’t slaves; they have their own minds. Zhang Tao, Chi Wei, and Li Xiang didn’t attack him because their affection level was -100, making them loyal.

But an ordinary zombie, even if successfully recruited, would still be ferocious and attack him.

What has the world come to? Is there no hope?

Meng Xu’s goodwill in providing employment to zombies was met with hostility. Truly, hell is empty, and the zombies walk among us!

Can’t employees just do their jobs well without overthinking?

Wait… I didn’t think that way when I was an employee.

Meng Xu furrowed his brow, realizing a blind spot in his thinking.

No, I must be a conscientious boss and not become someone reeking of greed!

Regardless, Meng Xu had to perform his first layoff.

Yet a core issue remained.

“Do I have to give severance pay for this?”

The thought left Meng Xu speechless.

Who understands this issue?

To be cautious, Meng Xu picked up his phone and dialed Lawyer Zhang Wei.

Although Lawyer Zhang Wei had turned into a zombie, Meng Xu believed in the goodness and love in the world.

Zombies are different; despite being a zombie, Lawyer Zhang Wei often provided legal advice, clearing up many doubts for Meng Xu.

After ringing for a while, no one answered.

But that didn’t stop Meng Xu.

He pretended the call was connected.

“Hello? Lawyer Zhang? Yes, it’s me again, Chairman Meng of Peace and Order.”

Meng Xu warmly conversed with the ‘Sorry, your call cannot be connected at this moment’ message: “I ran into a problem recently… You know how it is with big bosses—there are often small mistakes…”

In truth, Meng Xu had no clue what being a big boss entailed, but he decided to fake it.

Pretending to have a conversation, Meng Xu nodded as if listening intently and then concluded, “Oh, so this counts as self-defense? I don’t need to give severance pay? That’s good.”

With that, Meng Xu hung up the phone and spoke condescendingly to the struggling, moaning zombie on the ground.

“Liu Xiaojun, on behalf of the company’s HR department, I officially notify you that you are fired! You’ve violated some labor laws, so no compensation is due. Plus, you attacked me first, so my counterattack is within the bounds of self-defense. I’ve already discussed this with my lawyer. If you disagree, you can take it up with Lawyer Zhang Wei at his firm!”

Then, Meng Xu turned and casually grabbed a pack of cigarettes from the rack.

No particular reason.

A big boss should always carry some cigarettes.

Even if he didn’t smoke, he had to consider his business partners.

【Employee ‘Liu Xiaojun’ has been terminated.】

Seeing this message, Meng Xu finally exhaled a sigh of relief.

His earlier antics might have seemed manic, but Meng Xu had perfectly deciphered the system’s mechanics. Despite the apocalypse, some steps couldn’t be skipped. Just going through the motions as if it were still peacetime often triggered hidden ‘achievements.’

Most importantly, Meng Xu had convincingly played his role as chairman!

I’m not crazy; my mental state is excellent. My Spirit attribute is a solid 10.5, just so everyone knows!

【Ignorance of the law is no excuse! Knowing and following the law makes you a good citizen! Fear not an uneducated chairman; fear a chairman who knows the law! A law-savvy capitalist is truly frightening.】
【Unlocked Hidden Achievement: Law-Savvy Capitalist.】
【Achievement Rewards: Chairman Experience +5, Points +1, Yuan +5000.】

The achievement rewards were very timely.

Meng Xu nodded with satisfaction, and was about to leave, but then turned back, pulled out a red bill, and placed it on the cash register of Xiaojun Supermarket.

Almost forgot.

Once fired, Liu Xiaojun was no longer his employee.

You have to pay for your purchases.

“Phew.”

Meng Xu exhaled in relief, almost becoming a law-ignorant capitalist… Ahem, almost becoming an unconscientious entrepreneur!

Meng Xu stepped out of Xiaojun Supermarket and looked at the zombie still wriggling at the entrance. He placated, “Xiaojun, let’s part ways amicably. I, Chairman Meng, am not one to hold grudges. Feel free to visit the company in the future.”

“Oh, right, you haven’t been to the company. In that case, just die.”

With that, Meng Xu gave Liu Xiaojun the gift of eternal sleep.

In the eternal silence, perhaps he would dream of those peaceful days again.

“Huff~”

After taking a deep breath, Meng Xu scanned his surroundings, set his direction, and continued toward the Citizen Service Center.

The Citizen Service Center was quite far.

But fortunately, Meng Xu was no ordinary person.

Upon leaving Xiaojun Supermarket, Meng Xu looked at the shared bike station by the roadside. Calculating the distance, he immediately decided to continue his journey on a shared bike.

After swiftly dispatching two zombies, Meng Xu approached, pulled out his phone, and scanned the bike.

He was met with a ‘Not yet returned’ screen reminder.

“Sigh.”

Meng Xu sighed, feeling a bit worn out.

Without hesitation, he grabbed the bike’s handlebars and yanked it free from the bike rack with a satisfying ‘crunch.’ Thinking for a moment, he left three hundred yuan, pressed it down with a rock, and then leisurely rode off toward the Citizen Service Center.

Meng Xu firmly believed in the ethics of the wandering zombies.

He trusted they wouldn’t take the three hundred yuan.

If they did, it would be outrageously unfair!

But Meng Xu still believed in the goodness and love in the world.

With that thought, Meng Xu leisurely pedaled on the shared bike, heading forward.

…

“He’s gone?”

Inside the warehouse of Xiaojun Supermarket, a head peeked out, watching Meng Xu disappear into the distance. The person felt stunned and a bit fearful.

At that moment, a crisp voice echoed in the warehouse: “Brother, why didn’t we let that uncle in to protect us?”

“That man is terrifying! I’ve been listening for a while; he fought his way here, and his combat skills are off the charts! Then he met Uncle Xiaojun. First, he talked about making him his employee, then he fired him and chopped him up… Clearly, he’s a cyberpsycho—no, an apocalyptic psycho! There’s no good in joining him! I might get chopped into pieces, and you, who just turned sixteen, would face an even worse fate!”

The young man shuddered involuntarily. Then, he thought of something and whispered, “Pack up the supplies, leave through the back door, and tell the neighbors. If they encounter this apocalyptic psycho, run immediately and don’t turn back to take pictures!”

After saying that, the young man sighed deeply.

Not only is there a zombie apocalypse, but also an apocalyptic psycho who enjoys pretending to be a chairman and takes pleasure in killing employees.

When will such times ever end?