My Cheat System

Muttering and twitching sounds escaped from her mouth.

"Ugh... ugh..."

It took her a moment to recover. She shook her head and finally saw what was right in front of her—a gigantic slime. She had just accidentally bumped into it!

"S-sorry! Paimon didn't mean to! Please, don't eat Paimon!"

After a while, seeing that the slime didn't react, Paimon let out a sigh of relief and continued flying forward.

"Phew... This is too much. Paimon is so tired, and Amber and the others aren't here either... Might as well walk."

However, the moment her feet touched the ground, a jolt of electricity shot through her.

"Aahhh~ aaahhhhhh~~~!"

She quickly lifted her foot and clamped a hand over her mouth, finally breathing out a sigh of relief.

"Why is the ground electrified?!"

Paimon fumed. The only good news was that all the slimes really were asleep—no need to worry about a group ambush.

Finally, ten minutes later, she gritted her teeth and reached her destination.

"Paimon finally made it! Huh? What's this?"

At the endpoint, resting atop a flat rock, was a golden rectangular slip of paper.

"Wow! It's a voucher for a free night at the Mondstadt Grand Hotel! Yay! Paimon knew Amber's the best to Paimon!"

Paimon was overjoyed. She picked up the voucher and started heading back the way she came.

"Hehe, what should Paimon eat at the hotel~?"

She drooled unconsciously.

BANG! A loud crash made Paimon jump.

Her face turned pale. Like a startled hamster, she quickly dove behind a large rock.

After a moment, she cautiously poked her head out and looked around from a distance—only to find that it was just a slime rolling over in its sleep and falling off a rock.

"Stupid slime! You scared Paimon half to death, you know?!"

The more she thought about it, the angrier she got.

"Take this—Paimon Headbutt!"

She launched herself forward with a headbutt.

Paimon was instantly bounced back, hitting the ground and falling into a tingly, buzzing daze.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh——!!"

At the same time, the slime let out a sharp screech. The entire canyon of slimes reacted like a chain reaction, gradually crackling to life.

Up on the cliff, Amber's expression changed dramatically.

"That's the sound of slimes?! Oh no—the slime horde is waking up!"

Zephyr was stunned. "What!?"

Weren't slimes supposed to sleep for a whole month, only waking for a few days? Paimon's luck was unbelievably terrible! They hurried down the cliff.

They arrived just in time to see Paimon twitching all over from the electric shock.

Lumine exclaimed, "Paimon! We have to save her!"

Without hesitation, Zephyr lunged forward and leapt down.

Even though he knew Paimon wasn't ordinary, even though he knew she could probably survive even if surrounded by slimes, he still instinctively jumped down.

Normally, falling from such a height would be fatal or at least cause serious injury.

However, he used a plunging attack to neutralize the fall damage.

In the game, fall damage from plunging attacks has a limit—there's no such thing as dying from using a plunging attack mid-air.

But this world was nearly real, and logically, such a thing shouldn't be possible. Strictly speaking, he had just exploited a system bug!

At the same time, the forceful impact of the plunging attack sent nearby slimes flying.

On-screen, the words Paralysis appeared.

"Paralysis?"

Zephyr picked up Paimon, only to notice his character's movements had significantly slowed.

This... This wasn't a mechanic in the original game.

Suddenly, a flaming arrow shot from the sky and exploded, blasting away several slimes that were closing in.

No other elemental slime would react like that—fortunately, all the slimes in this canyon were Electro Slimes.

When fire and electro interact, an Overload reaction occurs, causing explosive knockback.

Amber shouted, "Zephyr, use the Baron Bunny I gave you!"

Upon hearing that, Zephyr immediately threw out the quick-slot Baron Bunny and used the distraction to escape through a gap.

The slimes were lured by the Baron Bunny and didn't attack them.

But soon, several loud booms echoed as the slimes were blasted away—only for even more to start pouring in from behind.

"Fiery Rain!"

Amber activated her ultimate—an endless rain of fire arrows poured down behind Zephyr and the others, creating a temporary safe zone that held the slimes at bay.

But it wouldn't last long. The slimes would be on them again soon.

Amber shouted, "Look over there, a Anemo Slime!"

Zephyr immediately understood what she meant and lunged forward, sword ready.

The Anemo Slime was completely confused. It hadn't done anything—just sleeping peacefully—when it was suddenly stabbed out of nowhere. It didn't even get the chance to get angry.

With a boom, its body burst, and Zephyr used the resulting wind blast to soar straight out of the canyon.

"Phew... That was close," Amber said as she wiped the cold sweat from her brow.

"Yeah."

Inside the canyon, the slimes had lost their target and began bouncing around aimlessly.

Paimon patted her chest and said, "Scared—Paimon was so scared! Thank you, Traveler!"

"No problem. But... why did those slimes suddenly attack you?"

"Uh..."

Paimon froze. What was she supposed to say? That she got hot-headed and attacked a slime first, and the slime was only acting in self-defense?

Of course she couldn't say that!

"Ehehe..."

"Paimon..."

Amber quickly stopped Zephyr. "Don't be rash, don't be rash. She's still just a kid. Just a kid."

"Paimon is not a kid!" Paimon argued.

She was actually a six-thousand-year-old!

Amber shot her a sharp look. I'm trying to cover for you, and this is how you act? You little troublemaker.

"Don't be rash, really. She's just a kid. Wait till she grows up a bit—then you can eat her."

Paimon gaped. "Amber, you've changed!!"

Suddenly, Zephyr slapped his thigh as if he remembered something. "Damn it! I totally forgot—I could've just fast-traveled! Unbelievable!"

Paimon looked equally speechless. "Traveler, your memory's getting worse. Are you... getting dementia?"

Zephyr raised a middle finger.

Amber stepped in, "Alright, alright. What matters is it all worked out in the end."

Paimon asked, "Amber, what about Paimon's flying exam? Did Paimon pass?"

"Of course... you did not!"

"Eh?!"

"Eh, what? These slimes sleep for over 350 days a year. As long as you don't provoke them, they only wake up once or twice a month. What exactly did you do to stir up the whole horde? Or is your luck just that bad—you just happened to run into their once-a-month wake-up?"

"Uhh…"

Zephyr said, "No need to ask. I bet Paimon was wondering what slimes taste like and took a bite. Hurt it, woke it up."

"N-no way! Paimon might be a glutton, but Paimon wouldn't eat a slime!"

Paimon started to panic a little. Admittedly, the thought had crossed her mind earlier… but that electric shock made her give up on the idea.

"Alright, Paimon. You've got two options: one, officially fail the exam. Two, take the test again."

Paimon froze. "Huh? But the slimes are already awake. How Paimon is supposed to retake it?"

Amber explained, "Don't worry. I've tested this before—when slimes wake up by accident, they go back to sleep after about an hour."

"Then... Paimon will do it again. Paimon dropped her free hotel voucher in the canyon and didn't get it back."

"Sasuga Paimon."

An hour later, the slimes gradually calmed down and drifted off into sweet dreams. This time, Paimon completed the test smoothly.

By then, the sky had already darkened.

"Paimon, this is all your fault. We wasted so much time."

"Paimon's fault? You two should be thanking Paimon!"

"What the heck are you talking about?"

Paimon rolled her eyes. "Don't think Paimon didn't notice—you two were up there all lovey-dovey. Paimon gave you a chance to be alone together!"

"..."

Amber's face turned bright red. "A-anyway, it's getting late. Let's head back."

"Mm-hmm... Wait, no!"

Zephyr suddenly remembered something. "Amber, you go on ahead. I almost forgot—I haven't done my daily quests yet!"

Paimon shrugged. "That's why Paimon told you to finish them earlier."

Amber looked worried. "But it's already so late."

"It's fine. You head back first."

After some convincing, Amber teleported back, leaving Zephyr alone to finish his tasks.

Paimon let out a sigh. "Ugh... Why can't Paimon use fast travel alone? Why do Paimon have to be out here in the middle of the night with some random guy fighting Hilichurls? This is just sad."

Lumine chimed in, "I'm a girl."

//END

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