I Will No Longer Live As Your Villainess

Illina grew up basking in excessive attention and praise from Brant and Anne, which led her to believe she was inherently superior to others. She saw herself as someone of exceptional value.

In social circles, Illina used wealth to subtly win people’s favor, ensuring they would compliment her indirectly. She never displayed overt arrogance herself.

If anyone appeared even slightly superior to her, Illina would either play the victim to instill guilt or manipulate unpopular men to humiliate them, ensuring they could no longer show their faces in society. This earned her the nickname “The Poison of the Social Circle,” rather than its flower.

Her generosity was never driven by genuine emotion—always by ulterior motives.

Illina believed she could get away with anything, no matter how excessive or cruel her actions were.

“Please, Illina. Don’t kill it. I’m begging you.”

Laurencia knelt before Illina, pleading, but Illina showed no mercy.

“Please, save it. I’m begging you—it’s my friend. Please, save it.”

“A bird? Your friend? That’s hilarious.”

In front of Laurencia, the small bird was torn apart and died.

Moments earlier, the bird had been soaring energetically through the sky. Now its wings, once so full of life, were limp and broken. The pained chirps that had filled the room faded into silence.

“P-Please… Illina…”

“What should I do? Laurencia’s friend died so easily.”

The small bird, which had become her friend by visiting her window every time she sang the lullaby her late mother had taught her, now lay discarded on the floor like trash. Laurencia, her face pale, stretched out a trembling hand toward the cold, lifeless bird, only to recoil when Illina crushed it underfoot with a smile.

The lifeless bird’s hollow eyes reflected emptiness, and Laurentia withdrew her hand, horrified.

After that incident, Laurencia refused to open her window or sing for a long time. She vowed never to make friends again.

“Why don’t you sing anymore? Are you afraid I’ll kill your friend again? Are you scared?”

Tears welled up in Laurencia’s eyes as she recalled the gruesome death of the bird.

“You’re such an idiot. How would I know if a bird entering your room was the same one or not? I just caught and killed any bird. Seriously, you’re so dumb. Don’t worry—I won’t kill birds anymore. You can sing again.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

Laurencia started singing again, reassured by Illina’s promise. For a brief moment, she was thankful that Illina kept her word.

But the relief was short-lived.

“Could you stop killing animals altogether?”

“Sure, I’ll stop. But only if you kill this puppy for me instead. How about that?”

“No.”

“Pick up the knife. If you don’t, this puppy will suffer for a long time before it dies.”

Laurencia shook her head violently.

“If this puppy suffers and dies slowly, it’ll all be your fault, Laurentia.”

“Don’t do this.”

“This puppy is suffering because of you.”

Illina laughed, grabbing the puppy by the scruff of its neck. Laurentia shut her eyes tightly as the sound of the puppy’s tortured cries pierced her ears, her body trembling.

The cries seemed to beg for death, to end the pain. At least, that’s how Laurentia tried to justify it to herself.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

The puppy’s cries stopped abruptly as its life was snuffed out.

That day, Illina forced the knife into Laurentia’s hand, compelling her to kill the puppy. It was the first time Laurencia experienced gut-wrenching sobs. The pain wasn’t physical but emotional, the trauma of taking an innocent life forced upon her by someone else’s will.

The aftermath was more severe than Laurentia expected. She learned to pretend to suffer more from hunger or lack of sleep, hoping Illina would leave her alone.

“You don’t seem too bothered. You know, the only time you look truly miserable is when you’re killing animals. Isn’t that right, Laurencia?”

Just seeing the kitten in Illina’s arms brought back memories of that dreadful day. Every time Illina forced her to take a young, innocent life, Laurencia’s guilt grew. She was young, but that didn’t absolve her of the remorse she felt. The guilt didn’t fade easily.

“What are you thinking about in front of me, Laurencia?”

“I was just thinking about the kitten you’re holding—it reminded me of the past…”

Laurencia looked meaningfully at the black kitten in Illina’s arms, enough to stir memories of Illina’s previous cruel acts.

“Really? It reminded you of the past? That’s exactly why I brought it.”

Illina reveled in exerting her dominance, especially through fear and intimidation. The more someone cried, the more satisfied she felt.

What Illina didn’t realize was that Laurentia was no longer the helpless girl she used to torment.

“This kitten is adorable, isn’t it?” Illina asked, carefully observing Laurentia’s expression.

Laurencia wept as memories of the cruelly slain bird resurfaced.

“You’re such a fool. How would I know if the bird in this room is the same one that flew in before? I just caught and killed any bird I could find… Truly, you’re pathetic. Don’t worry—I won’t kill any more birds. You can sing again.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

Reassured by Illina’s promise, Laurencia began singing again. For a brief moment, she even felt thankful that Illina kept her word.

But the relief was short-lived.

“Could you stop killing animals altogether?”

“Sure, I’ll stop. But only if you kill this puppy for me instead. How about that?”

“No.”

“Pick up the knife. If you don’t, this puppy will suffer for a long time before it dies.”

Laurencia shook her head fiercely.

“If this puppy suffers a long and painful death, it’ll all be your fault, Laurencia.”

“Don’t do this.”

“This puppy is suffering because of you.”

Illina grinned, gripping the puppy by the scruff of its neck. Laurencia closed her eyes tightly, trembling as the sound of the puppy’s agonized cries pierced her ears.

The cries seemed to beg for death, a desperate plea to end the pain. At least, that’s how Laurencia rationalized it to herself.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

The puppy’s cries ceased abruptly as its life was snuffed out.

The day Illina forced the knife into Laurencia’s hand, compelling her to kill the puppy, Laurencia wept uncontrollably for the first time in her life. The emotional pain of being coerced into taking a life far exceeded any physical suffering.

The trauma lingered far longer than Laurencia had expected. To cope, she pretended to suffer more when Illina deprived her of food or sleep, hoping to distract her tormentor.

“You don’t seem very bothered. You know, the only time you truly look miserable is when you’re forced to kill animals, don’t you, Laurencia?”

Just seeing the kitten in Illina’s arms brought back haunting memories. Being forced to take young, innocent lives was something that tormented Laurencia deeply. Even though she had been young and powerless, she couldn’t escape the guilt.

“What are you thinking about in front of me, Laurencia?”

“I was just reminded of the past when I saw the adorable kitten you’re holding.”

Laurencia’s words, as she gazed meaningfully at the black kitten in Illina’s arms, were enough to evoke the memory of Illina’s past cruelty.

“Really? The past? That’s exactly why I brought it.”

Illina thrived on exerting power, especially through fear. The more someone cried, the more satisfied she felt.

What Illina didn’t realize was that the helpless Laurencia she had once tormented no longer existed.

“This kitten is so cute, isn’t it?” Illina asked, carefully observing Laurencia’s expression.

“It’s the most adorable one of the litter, handpicked just for you.”

Laurencia gazed at the kitten in Illina’s arms with an unreadable expression. She knew Illina’s affection for the kitten was fleeting and conditional, much like her interest in anything else. The memory of Illina strangling a puppy after cooing over its cuteness still haunted her.

“Illina, I don’t like this.”

“What don’t you like? Killing a cat? You did a good job of it last time when I handed you the knife.”

Illina’s hand stopped petting the kitten as she spoke.

Laurencia let out a small sigh.

“Illina, you don’t need my help to kill. You’re perfectly capable of doing it yourself. Acting like a child and demanding that I do it for you is quite troublesome. If it’s something you want, you should take care of it yourself. I can’t keep doing it for you.”

Laurencia’s firm words caused Illina’s face to flush red with shame. The tone of her remark was akin to scolding a naive child.

“What did you just say?”

“To be honest, Illina, killing little animals doesn’t elicit any feelings in me anymore. Isn’t it the same for you? Don’t tell me you still find satisfaction in killing such insignificant creatures.”

Laurencia’s violet eyes curved into crescents as she spoke, her hand slowly reaching for the kitten in Illina’s arms.

“Taking the life of a small, unaware creature isn’t interesting, is it? Don’t you think, Illina?”

Laurencia gently pulled the kitten out of Illina’s arms as she continued.

“I’ll do it for you this time, Illina. But next time, don’t ask me to kill such trivial little animals.”

Her voice was soft, almost kind, as if she were offering mercy.

“What are you talking about? I didn’t bring that kitten for you to kill! Give it back!”

“Illina, what are you saying? Don’t you remember why you’ve always brought animals to my room? It was always to ask me to kill them for you. Did you forget?”

Laurencia’s crescent-shaped smile faded as her violet eyes met Illina’s.

“Think about it, Illina. Have any of the animals you brought to my room ever left alive?”

Illina prided herself on carefully killing even small mice to maximize Laurencia’s shock and pain. Watching Laurencia cry and beg was a source of amusement for her.

“Not a single one. You know that, don’t you?”

This version of Laurencia felt unfamiliar to Illina. Normally, she would be trembling and crying, begging for mercy for the kitten. Instead, Laurencia treated her like a bothersome younger sibling. Was this a result of the severe abuse she had endured?

“Illina, wouldn’t it be more thrilling to kill people who cry and beg for their lives instead of these trivial, small creatures?”

Laurencia spoke in a strangely excited tone, her violet eyes meeting Illina’s as she smiled. Cold sweat ran down Illina’s back.

“Don’t you think it would be far more entertaining than killing animals?”

“Give me the kitten back.”

“No.”

A radiant smile spread across Laurencia’s face, as bright as a blooming flower.

As Illina stood to retrieve the kitten, a knock at the door interrupted them, followed by a maid announcing Luanse’s early arrival at the estate.

Illina, flustered by Luanse’s unexpected arrival, left the room with a frustrated expression.

After Illina left, Laurencia opened the terrace door and gently set the kitten down on the floor. The kitten lifted its chin haughtily and began crying nonstop, staring at Laurencia.

“Why are you crying?”

“Meow.”

“Do you want me to hold you again?”

“Meow, meow.”

Sighing, Laurencia picked up the kitten again. It immediately stopped crying, stretched in her arms with a long yawn, and purred contentedly, swishing its tail.

“You’re nothing like you were in Illina’s arms.”

Laurencia softly stroked the kitten’s head, whispering to it. The kitten’s golden eyes sparkled as it looked up at Laurencia, almost as if offering her comfort.