I Tried To Be Her Loyal Sword

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142 Chapter

Human emotions aren’t just conveyed through words. The expressions, voices, and eyes at that moment all spoke, and sometimes the words spoken with the mouth didn’t match the body’s language.

Zigmund really seemed to hate me. The hatred brimming in his eyes was definitely directed at me. However, it was clear that his feelings towards me weren’t just hate.

‘It seems we’re both in similar situations.’

Even though I knew he was a very suspicious character with many dubious actions, I couldn’t cut him off. While I resented him, I also felt pity for him, and although I suspected him, I half believed in him.

‘Just like you held onto me out of foolishness, I couldn’t let go of you due to our bond.’

Zigmund and I were essentially parts of each other.

“I can’t stand you either, Zigmund.”

I sighed and roughly swept my bangs aside. The black strands of hair entangled in my fingers were the exact same color as Zigmund’s hair, which really annoyed me.

“So tell me, what do you want to do? It can’t be that you just reappeared to play hide and seek with me like before.”

I coldly retorted, momentarily recalling my childhood.

Karasho would often make us play hide and seek as a kind of training.

“Kashmir lacks skills in stealth. Fighting isn’t just about charging in headfirst. You should know how to hold your breath too. On the other hand, Zigmund was only excellent at hiding but lacked in chasing. In hide and seek, you can’t just hide all the time. You need to know how to seek as well.”

She had a keen understanding of what each of us lacked.

The usual location was a dense forest. If Zigmund found me within a set time, it was his victory; if I remained undiscovered until the time was up, it was mine.

‘Damn! If I were the seeker, you’d be caught within five minutes!’

‘You’ve been caught by that damn ferret, and you’re the one talking too much. Tch… Why are you so light? You’d barely fetch 10 gold at the market.’

Zigmund usually took the upper hand in our hide-and-seek matches. I did win sometimes, but in the end, he won four out of five games.

Karasho had told me not to take it too badly, saying I lost not because of talent differences but because of our four-year age gap, but I still wanted to win, especially since when Zigmund found me, he always grabbed my nape and paraded me in front of Karasho like a trophy. I definitely didn’t want to lose.

Of course, when I did win, I would carry Zigmund like a princess in my arms. It was an unspoken rule that we wouldn’t question the mode of transport.

‘Next time I win, just know you’ll be stuffed into a sack of potatoes and carried around on my shoulder.’

‘Dream big… Is your neck hurting?’

‘…Not particularly.’

Zigmund and I would often nip at each other, but we never truly hated one another.

We were both lonely people, relying on one another to sustain warmth in the cool shadows cast away from the sunlight.

There was no way we could forsake each other.

‘But there’s no way to go back to that time.’

The year I spent with Zigmund was profound and deep, irrespective of the actual time, but the six-year gap that kept us apart was also immense. No matter where our relationship ended up, it was clear it wasn’t going to be the same.

“…My answer remains unchanged.”

Zigmund, who had also been lost in thought, slowly opened his mouth. The pair of purple eyes, now devoid of the faint liveliness they once held, fixed on me.

“I will leave a scar on you. Regardless of how I think of you or what I want to do in the future, that’s how it will be. You’ll soon realize it too.”

A pair of amethyst crystals lay desolately in the middle of winter, deep and buried in the snow.

“We are the antithesis of each other, unable to coexist.”

Antithesis. A proposition that refutes another proposition, highlighting the flaws in one. A contradiction that makes coexistence impossible.

“If I live, you will inevitably die, and if you live, I will inevitably die. It will definitely end that way.”

Zigmund was adamant that we couldn’t coexist.

To say we couldn’t coexist meant he intended to kill me to save himself—a rather cruel statement, yet I accepted it calmly.

In truth, I might have instinctively sensed it since reuniting with Zigmund.

This long-time foe before me would bring an eternal winter, and to end that winter, I would have to cut him down.

“Then maybe on the day we meet again, we might have to draw swords against each other.”

I softly uttered as I picked up a candied violet flower and placed it on my tongue. The sweet purple taste felt bitter in my mouth.

“…Yeah.”

Zigmund replied a beat late as he leaned forward towards me. The distance between us, which had been a step apart, closed.

“But today isn’t that day.”

His low, deep voice whispered just a couple of feet away.

I could momentarily read the emotions swirling in his eyes. It bore a resemblance to foolishness, but it was a feeling deeper than mere foolishness.

“You…”

“You came to request something today, didn’t you?”

Just as I was about to say something, Zigmund cut me off. His resolute gaze conveyed the message that he wouldn’t discuss it any further.

After keeping my lips sealed for a moment, I turned to follow the direction Zigmund had shifted to.

“Yeah.”

“It’s quite lucky for you to be able to request directly from the Guild Master.”

He nodded satisfactorily, resting his chin on his clasped hands.

“We will serve you wholeheartedly, dear customer.”

Zigmund narrowed his eyes in a teasing manner. Witnessing his absurd levity, I grimaced and sighed.

“I’d like you to find information on a person. Three individuals.”

“How deep of information are you looking for?”

“Dig up everything that can be sold. From basic personal details to trivial habits and secretive secrets. I’ll pay whatever is asked.”

At my straightforward answer, Zigmund looked at me with narrowed eyes.

I knew what that look meant: he found it intriguing.

“Interesting. I’ll do my best. What’s the name?”

“First up is Leisha. I don’t know the surname. She was once the nurse of the ninth prince of the Atara Kingdom, who is now the king, Alexandros Atara, and has since passed away. And…”

“And?”

I hesitated for a moment before slowly opening my mouth.

“It’s just a guess, but Leisha might be a silver wolf beastkin.”

Zigmund’s eyes sharpened.

Silver wolf beastkin were innately powerful to the extent that each individual could be considered a weapon, and their numbers were few.

Since the beastkin massacre incident, they had become incredibly closed off, rarely coming out of their territories, so it was shocking information that one who had once been a nurse for the Atara royal family would be a silver wolf beastkin.

“I find it hard to believe, but I’ll keep it in mind for now. What’s the second?”

“The second is Audrey. I don’t know the surname. She’s deceased as well, and I don’t know anything more about her.”

“Oh.”

As I boldly admitted to knowing nothing, Zigmund let out a hollow laugh.

I knew that with such minimal information, tracing someone down was nearly impossible, but I simply didn’t know much about my mother at all, so I had nothing to say.

“There’s nothing I can do with this information. Is there anything else, no matter how trivial?”

Zigmund tapped the armrest of the sofa with his finger, tilting his head. After pondering deeply, I finally spoke up.

“She lived on the outskirts of the capital before she died. I remember she had brown hair and gray eyes. And this is just a low probability guess, but… it seems she changed her name at some point. The name she changed to is Audrey.”

“A name change?”

I nodded at Zigmund’s question.

‘It feels like there was some other name…’

I was not sure, merely feeling it. It was a vague guess from my blurry memories of my mother, akin to the idea that she had another name.

Zigmund, who exhaled softly at my ambiguous expression, nodded.

“Let’s focus on those who changed their name to ‘Audrey.’ And?”

“And…

The last third person. I paused for a moment.

Among those I know, the most mysterious and difficult person. The only one among those I wanted to know who is still alive. I looked right at Zigmund.

“Zigmund. Zigmund Hyde.”

The very person standing before me.

Zigmund blinked slowly. His long, thick black eyelashes fluttered like butterfly wings. I maintained a calm expression as I continued speaking.

“Black hair and purple eyes. He lived in the Empire until six years ago but has since gone missing. I want information on Zigmund Hyde.”

Requesting information on Zigmund from Zigmund himself was quite humorous.

In fact, since discovering he was the Guild Master here, I had almost given up any desire to investigate him.

I wouldn’t expect Zigmund to provide accurate information on himself, and even if many people clawed to find out, it didn’t seem likely they would gain any more than a name on ‘Hide & Seek’ Guild Master, who remained unknown.

Thus, this was simply a warning. A warning that I would definitely find out your intentions and schemes.

Zigmund, hearing my response, burst into laughter. Resting his chin on his hand, he tilted his head lazily.

“That person’s information is rather expensive, though.”

“You said you would pay whatever is asked.”

“How much do you think I’ll request? Are you confident?”

Zigmund spoke in a provocative tone. I twisted my lips, slightly raising my eyebrows.

“If I can get the information properly, I’ll pay you double whatever amount you’re thinking of.”

At my self-assured retort, Zigmund laughed again. His face remained a poker face, yet to me, he seemed to be enjoying this.

“Fine. Please find out about that person.”

“Thank you. So, what would the reward amount be?”

His purple eyes roamed briefly in the air. Rubbing his chin, Zigmund shook his head.

“Now that I think about it, I have already received my payment from you.”

“…What?”

As I narrowed my eyes, Zigmund leisurely spread both hands.

“I said I received an advance payment with the borrowed items from your home.”

‘This bastard…

I took a deep breath. Witnessing Zigmund brazenly state that he borrowed my fairy cards, my hand instinctively reached for the hilt of my sword, but I barely managed to put it down.

Thinking of Leo, who was crumbling due to Leisha’s belongings, I wanted nothing more than to slice Zigmund in two right then and retrieve my fairy cards.

However, it was uncertain if those fairy cards were even here, and attacking Zigmund in this place would make me hunted by the entire Guild.

‘You bastard. You’ll never get a single coin from me…!’

I bit my lip as I recalled that moment, a scowl on my face as I stood up. Zigmund turned his gaze toward me.

“How will you deliver the obtained information to me?”

“Oh, I’ll have it delivered to your home.”

“…You’re quite good at wrapping your intentions with flowery words.”

“If you want, I can find out what you ate yesterday too.”

An urge to punch the annoyingly grinning Zigmund rose in me, but I suppressed it, recalling the elation of spitting in his face during our first meeting.

“…I’ll be waiting for the information. Send it quickly.”

Having run out of things to say, I moved to leave without hesitation.

It didn’t seem like a moment for farewell, and just as I was about to open the door and step out—

“I’ve been curious for a while now. If I explain everything, will you understand?”

Zigmund’s voice caught my feet. I couldn’t see what expression he wore since I was turned away, but his low, thick, and emotionless tone sounded just as usual, yet somehow I understood.

This was how Zigmund expressed his attachments.

“Don’t you think it’s too late for that?”

I sighed deeply from the bottom of my heart.

I shut my eyes for a moment.

Had he come to me a few years sooner and said this, I might have agreed. But he missed the timing, and we both knew there was no way back to how things used to be.

The emotions suppressed were thick, cloyingly sweet, and rotting like overripe fruit.

“Kashmir.”

“AX”

TTTT-

“…Yeah.”

My nickname hadn’t been often spoken by Zigmund in childhood, but it seemed he was accustomed to calling my nickname. Like he had called it many times before.

“Are we still friends?”

‘Are we still friends?’

In Zigmund’s question languorously echoed the inquiry from our first reunion. I recalled my answer back then.

‘You were never a friend to me, and you never will be.’

I had given a coarse, angry reply mixed with insults and lies. I had no regrets over that moment’s answer, yet it was not the truth.

“I don’t know either.”

So for this time, I spoke the truth. It was my most honest answer.

With those words, I stepped out of the room, taking a deep breath as I leaned against the door for a moment.

Zigmund and I were each other’s antitheses as well as our greatest attachments.