I Become a Secret Police Officer of The Imperial Academy

Chapter 19

Class ended, and it was time for a break.

Ethel, who had been sitting at a distance, approached me.

Our eyes met, but neither of us spoke first.

Should I ask if she enjoyed the breakfast I sent her that day?

I had told myself repeatedly that once the semester began, I’d act naturally, like we used to. But that was easier said than done.

“Is your injury okay?”

“Yeah, it’s all healed.”

“…I see.”

If things were truly as they had been, we’d be exchanging meaningless small talk and laughing over trivial things by now.

That’s what friends are supposed to do.

Ethel once said we were still friends, but that was just a pleasant lie.

A hollow, contradictory one at that.

“Ellen, that thing you said last time… was it true?”

Julian had told me to rest. Maybe I should stop, now that I am back at the academy. It was only ever a suggestion, after all.

Though I’d lashed out and shattered a cup in anger back then, I remembered everything I said clearly.

I had, without realizing it, told Ethel that the demons I’d taken might still be alive.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

Ethel’s expression mixed desperation, anger, and perhaps sorrow.

“Besides, this doesn’t seem like the kind of thing to talk about here.”

“…You’re right. Should we grab lunch?”

“If you’re paying.”

“…You’ve got plenty of money.”

I grinned and showed her my empty pockets.

“I forgot and left it behind.”

Ethel sighed and helped me to my feet.

“Come to think of it, didn’t Theo say he’d be looking for us at lunch?”

“Then we can go to a café afterward.”

“…Alright.”

A minute later, Theo appeared with Isabel and Diana in tow.

“Still walking around with women on both arms, I see, Theo.”

“‘On both arms’? They’re just friends…”

“If you asked a stranger, they’d never believe that.”

“…Fair enough. Anyway, let’s all go eat together. It’s been a while.”

***

We left the academy grounds and strolled toward the shopping district. The streets were bustling again, full of people and energy.

It was hard to believe this same place had been a fiery hellscape just a month ago.

Lost in thought, I was gazing around when Diana struck up a conversation.

She wasn’t someone I respected enough to call “senior,” so I just referred to her as “Miss Diana.”

“H-Hey, Ellen, it’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

In hindsight, the fact that Diana wasn’t stuttering should’ve tipped me off that something was odd.

“Yes, it has been a while, Miss Diana.”

“Y-You’re still calling me that? Why won’t you call me ‘senior’?”

“Because Theo could probably charm me in a heartbeat, so I call him ‘senior.’ You, on the other hand, are a senior and I don’t have to worry about charming myself.”

“Oh, s-so we’re close friends, then?”

Ethel shot me a tired look, likely because she knew this was just another performance of mine.

She probably found it unsettling, given everything I’d done.

The reason I wasn’t the head of the family was simple: Julian wouldn’t have let Ethel walk free.

He would’ve extracted every bit of information and killed her brutally. Even if he let her live, she’d never see the sun again.

Our parents had known the truth: I was weak, fragile, and incapable.

In the end, hadn’t I proven them right by failing and losing Alicia before my very eyes?

By the time I was struggling to manage my expression, we’d arrived at the restaurant. 

Since Ethel was paying, I ordered the cheapest stew and bread. It wasn’t inexpensive, but it was the least costly option.

As we ate, Theo suddenly spoke up.

“Ellen, sorry for dropping by unannounced that day.”

I thought we’d already moved past that incident, so his apology caught me off guard.

“Oh, apologizing only now? I’d almost forgotten about it, but now it’s awkward again.”

“I just felt like I needed to say it.”

“You’re welcome to visit again if you’d like—just give me a heads-up next time.”

Theo’s face showed mild surprise.

“When you say ‘brother,’ you mean the head of your house?”

“Yes.”

After finishing the meal with casual conversation, I grabbed Ethel by the wrist and led her into an alley behind the restaurant.

“Ethel, about going to a café—oh.”

Ethel, who had followed me into the alley, was crouching down, trembling.

Even from behind, I could see the flush spreading up her neck, as if her embarrassment was making her overheat. She buried her face in her knees and muttered.

“Ellen, I’m scared of you.”

“I see.”

I’d thought I was closer to an ordinary girl at this moment than the counselor from the parlor.

What part of me reminded her of that role?

Maybe working with my face exposed had been a mistake.

“Why did you do that to me?”

Because her parents, the Rosenbergs, had taken so many demons and vanished.

Because I had to find them, cage them, or dispose of them.

“…Why did you do that to me?”

Her voice sounded like she’d burst into tears if I didn’t answer.

Feeling a bit dizzy, I responded instinctively.

“Because you were hiding demons.”

“For that? Those children weren’t even there that night!”

“That doesn’t matter.”

“Then why did you kill the Hanton couple?”

She must have been referring to what fled toward Sorghum Farm with its young.

“Because they ran away.”

“But Lady Hanton stopped, didn’t she? She didn’t even resist. So why did you blow her head off in front of the child?”

Did Count Rosenberg tell her?

I should have just dealt with him. There was little overlap between us anyway.

Anyone who survived the parlor is dangerous, especially if they have a voice or power.

“She ran once, and she resisted once. Something that happens once is bound to happen again. In that sense, I was simply solving the problem.”

I pulled Ethel to her feet and pushed her against the wall.

“E-Ellen…?”

Then, from inside my coat, I drew a pistol and aimed it under her chin.

“Remember this, Ethel. Stop poking around like this.”

I pressed the muzzle firmly against her jaw. Judging by her trembling hands, it seemed to have the desired effect.

“I’ll endure it once, even if you bring Theo into this or stir up trouble. But there won’t be a next time.”

“…So, you did know what I was asking about all along.”

“Yes. Those beasts you love so much are probably still alive. Do you know how bothersome and costly it is to kill something? Even the bullets I used on those Hanton fools were a waste.”

Finding them, capturing them, locking them up, feeding and clothing them, and slowly disposing of them so the incinerator can keep up—it’s a process that drains both time and money.

Even listing the steps makes me feel like I can hear the sound of money slipping away.

“Pretend you didn’t see anything. If you hear something, block your ears. If you feel like talking, bite your tongue. That’s your job. Don’t make me regret letting you live.”

I removed the pistol from Ethel’s neck and tucked it back into my coat.

Julian claimed he was handling things quickly, but it seemed there hadn’t been any significant problems yet.

If there had, I’d have already heard about the chaos somewhere.

I touched my face, feeling tears and the distorted expression there.

Scraping it away with my nails and adjusting my features with my hands, I restored the usual cheerful smile I wore.

Ethel looked at me with pity.

I didn’t understand why.

I wasn’t someone who deserved pity.

“Ethel, let’s stop this pointless, boring talk. Let’s go back to class.”

“…Alright.”

Her eyes hadn’t lost their spark.

In fact, her face showed a look of determination—a look I’d seen far too many times.

The kind of look those deluded counseling subjects had when they thought their connections could protect them.

Even when their nails were ripped out and their limbs broken, they’d say, “You’ll pay for this one day.”

If I left her alone, would she call Theo?

I stopped and watched her walk for a moment.

Noticing I wasn’t beside her, she turned back, her expression curious.

“Aren’t you coming?”

“Go ahead. I’m feeling a bit dizzy.”

Should I deal with her now?

If Theo came, I wouldn’t be able to handle him.

I raised the pistol again, aiming at Ethel’s head with one eye closed for precision.

“There’s no way I can do it.”

The gun slipped from my hand, clattering to the ground.

If I were the kind of person who could go through with this, I would have disposed of her back in the parlor.

What would I even do with my life when all this was over?

I had never once thought about what came after the demons were dealt with.

I hadn’t even considered that such a moment might come.

Worrying about an uncertain future was pointless when I was still acting as if my unfinished work was already done.

I could think about it later.

I picked up the dusty gun, brushed it off, and returned it to my coat.

Then, I made my way back to the classroom.

When I walked in, Ethel glanced at me but didn’t say anything.

It felt like it was time to start working again.

If I kept myself busy, moved more, and handled things quickly, these intrusive thoughts would disappear.

What does it matter?

Even if Theo came and killed me, I could leave a lasting mark on this world.

I could leave behind the version of myself that remembered Alicia.