I Accidentally Got Isekai'd To Teyvat!

You ever have that weird feeling where you're talking about saving someone, and then out of nowhere, reality pile-drives you in the gut like a pro-wrestler? Yeah. That was me. That's my life now. Welcome to the inner psyche of Shigeru—former Earthling, current Teyvatian semi-pro disaster.

We were at the teapot. You know. The comfy space. Home base. Operation: Don't Let Nahida Become Doctor-Fried was in full discussion mode.

Lumine, Paimon, and Greg were gathered around the little stone table in our mansion garden. There were sweets, tea, snacks... and the slowly dawning realization that we were royally screwed.

"So her body is in some oversized test tube in some underground horror facility," I said, as casually as you'd announce a sale at Walmart. "Probably hooked up to who-knows-what. Definitely not spa vibes."

Greg let out a little hiss. He understood the assignment.

Paimon hovered over the table, looking very not-okay. "Paimon's pretty sure that's the creepiest sentence she's heard all week."

I twirled a cookie between my fingers like it was some ancient artifact. "Could be worse. Could've been a test tube and a Fatui seminar. Those guys talk like they're always writing a villain thesis paper."

"Shigeru, this is serious," Lumine said, her tone firm, arms crossed, golden eyes focused. "We need a plan."

"Oh we got one," I said, popping the cookie into my mouth. "Step one: survive. Step two: aggressively punch science."

Paimon groaned. "That's not a plan! That's just... Tuesday!"

I shrugged. "Then we're right on schedule."

Greg climbed up my shoulder like he was ready to throw hands.

"Look, I know it's bad. Dottore's got Nahida's body like a mad collector. And we're stuck playing hide and seek with a guy who probably considers emotional detachment a hobby."

"And what do you plan to do about it?" Lumine asked.

I grinned. "Surprise him with stupidity. Works 60% of the time, all the time."

That's when it hit me. Like an old memory resurfacing. Something cold and sharp. Something heavy.

I froze. Mid-cookie bite. My eyes drifted. Something in me twisted—like my brain held up a giant red flag.

Everyone blinked at me.

"I'll be going out for a bit," I muttered, standing up.

"Eh?" Paimon tilted her head. "Now? Where are you going?!"

"There's something I need to do," I said, brushing crumbs off my jacket. "You guys can take commissions in the meantime. Go touch grass or beat up some Hilichurls. Y'know. Normal stuff."

Lumine frowned slightly. "You sure you'll be okay alone?"

I looked at her and smiled. Not my usual dumb smile. Just... softer. "Don't worry. I'll be fine."

Paimon squinted. "That's the face you make before doing something super reckless."

"I make that face before breakfast," I said, turning to walk away.

Greg made a small chittering noise on my shoulder and jumped to Lumine's. Traitor. Even he was judging me.

The breeze inside the teapot was always gentle—too gentle for the storm swirling inside my chest.

I sat down on the front steps of our mansion, arms resting on my knees, staring ahead blankly like a protagonist mid-character-development.

"Master Shigeru," Tubby said softly from behind me. "It seems like you are thinking too deeply. Is there any problem?"

I didn't answer at first.

Just stared at the blue sky painted above us in this fake little world.

"...I was just thinking," I finally said. "Should I drop the idiotic face for now?"

Tubby remained silent for a moment, then said in that poetic voice of his, "A mask can protect—but it can also trap. Only you hold the key, and only you can choose which face you wear when the battle begins."

"...Tubby, are you secretly a poet?"

"I dabble."

I chuckled dryly. "I swear, this teapot's turning into a therapy session."

Then I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone.

Yes. My phone. The one that somehow still works in Teyvat. Don't ask. I don't even know how. Magic. Lore. Plot convenience. Who cares.

I hadn't touched it in a while. Too busy. Too scared.

I opened Genshin Impact.

Yup. Still working. Still scarily accurate.

I tapped on the Traveler's profile—my profile. And there they were.

Constellations.

I tapped on Lumine's profile first. Her constellations—already unlocked. I did that way back. Couldn't help it. I wanted to make sure she'd always be safe. Call it overprotective, call it simp behavior—whatever. I just couldn't bear the thought of her being hurt. Not ever.

Then I hovered over mine.

Constellation Zero.

"Because you're an idiot," I muttered to myself. "An idiot who didn't want to rely on power he didn't earn here."

I stared at the phone longer. Remembering. Learning. Dottore... in the game, Nahida threatened him using the Gnosis to corner him. That's the only reason he backed off.

But here?

Real-life Dottore? He's not some programmed villain with limited lines.

He's worse.

I gritted my teeth.

"Nahida... you cornered him before. But now? You're the cornered one."

I had enough resources. Enough fate. Enough...

...enough reason to stop playing around.

"I've met some of the Harbingers in the game," I muttered, remembering the quests, the banners, the drama. "Hell, I even kinda liked Tartaglia. Scaramouche's arc was messy, but fine. Arlecchino? Cool design. But Dottore..."

I clenched my phone tighter.

"That damn doctor's not someone you can just pass by. He's... different. Dangerous. He can't die yet—not when he's still useful in the long run. But he needs a lesson. A painful, unforgettable one."

I gritted my teeth, opened my constellation page, and without a second thought, I tapped my profile and unlocked it. All of it.

Anemo. Geo. Electro.

Stars lit up like fireworks. A little too dramatic, if you ask me.

"...Fine. Let the Fatui collect all the Gnosis. Let them think they're playing some big chess game."

I looked up again.

"But Dottore... that bastard... the way he uses people. That's something I can't ignore."

I took a deep breath. Smacked my cheeks with both hands. It stung.

"Alright," I muttered, fire burning in my gut. "Still think this is a bit too early... but I need to put that damn doctor in his place."

I opened my inventory. Browsed through the rewards. Questlines. Achievements. Loot galore.

We've cleared so much since we arrived in this messed-up world. Sumeru, Inazuma, Liyue. All of it.

And then I saw it.

The banner.

Inazuma Chronicle.

Still there.

Still stuck.

I died during that banner. My old life, left behind mid-wish. I tried pulling from it before, but nothing happened. It was like the game was frozen in time.

I laughed. "Figures."

Then I looked at the weapon banner. My eyes scanned across the screen. Harran Geppaku Futsu. Mistsplitter Reforged. Both weapons practically glowing at me like, 'Choose me, idiot.'

I gritted my teeth, opened my constellation page, and clicked unlock.I tapped the pull.

Animation began.

Let's see what the stars have for me this time.

***

Fuck. Sixty pulls and still nothing. I gritted my teeth and stared at the screen like it personally insulted my ancestors.

"C'mon… c'mon… just give it to me, baby… Daddy needs that blade."

Click. Another pull. That satisfying burst of light.

Blue.

Of course it was blue.

"You absolute Genshin scamming—"

I slammed my fist on the armrest of the teapot couch. The frustration boiled in my gut like overcooked soup, the sting of failure poking every nerve.

"Seventieth pull, come on. Give it to me, RNGesus! I've been a good chaotic gremlin!"

The screen lit up. Gold.

Cue dramatic gasp.

"Oh shit—finally! There she is, baby! Harran Geppaku Futsu!"

I was grinning like a maniac. I felt like I just pulled Ayaka herself out of the banner.

But I wasn't done.

Click. Another ten-pull. Because of course.

Another flash of gold.

And there it was. Mistsplitter Reforged.

I had them both.

My brain short-circuited. My wallet spiritually wept. My soul ascended.

"At this moment… I am at my strongest."

"Time to face that bastard," I muttered under my breath, clenching my fists. My heart wasn't racing—it was steady, focused. Everything that led up to this moment… every scar, every pain, every lesson… it brought me here.

I took one step forward. Then another. The weight of the coming storm pressing on my shoulders, but I didn't flinch.

"No more running. No more pretending. This ends now."

I cracked my neck. My ego inflated faster than a balloon pumped with helium and lies. I strapped those bad boys to my waist and teleported straight to the waypoint near the Akademiya.

The air was tense. The atmosphere? Immaculate. Each step echoed with final boss energy.

I casually strutted toward the Akademiya, feeling like a drip lord.

And then I heard clapping.

Slow. Menacing. The kind of clap that says, "I know something you don't."

"If it isn't the Hero of Teyvat," a smooth voice called out.

Oh no.

I knew that voice.

"The partner of the Honorary Knight of Mondstadt… one of the Heroes of Liyue… the Vice Commander of the Resistance Army in Inazuma… and now here."

I turned around.

And there he was. The walking trauma dump. Dottore.

He walked toward me, his expression unreadable except for the smugness oozing off of him like expired perfume.

"Sup, Doc. Still trying to get your greasy hands on something for your creepy Frankenstein research, you sick lunatic fuck?" I muttered. "What, run out of test subjects or war crimes to commit today?"

He chuckled. "I must thank you for saving Signora back in Inazuma. Truly commendable."

I squinted. "Right. That's why you tried to abduct a literal child and start a god-tier disaster."

"The situation is different here," he said, folding his hands behind his back like a polite mad scientist.

I took a deep breath, then stepped forward.

He mirrored me, closing the distance until our faces were only inches apart. The tips of our noses nearly touched. The wind whipped between us like the gods themselves were holding their breath.

His eyes glinted with twisted curiosity. Mine burned with barely restrained chaos.

Every instinct in me screamed danger, but I didn't move. I couldn't. This wasn't just a confrontation—it was a declaration.

"Power is essential to reach perfection," he murmured, his breath almost brushing against my skin. "Surely, you of all people understand."

I scoffed. "Yeah, I get power. But I don't burn down a city and stab three puppies to get it."

He chuckled again, this time softer. Almost intimate. It made my skin crawl.

"You always were emotional."

"And you always talk like a budget Batman villain."

Our foreheads almost met as I leaned closer. I could see the reflection of my elemental glow in his unnerving red eyes.

We stood there, eye to eye, just enough distance for dramatic anime wind to blow in between us.

I could feel the pressure around us start to build. The world seemed to dim, the sky pregnant with a storm.

"You know," I began, pacing a bit before stepping right back into his space, "I've encountered the Harbingers in the game before. Tartaglia? Surprisingly wholesome. Scaramouche? Absolute emo gremlin. La Signora? Still salty about that fight. The Captain? Absolute chad with an intense amount of main character energy."

I tilted my head, voice low.

"But you? You were always the kind of bastard I knew I couldn't let my guard down around. I can pass by you now, Doc. But don't think for a second you're not on the list. You're useful, sure. But even tools need to be reminded that they can be replaced."

His smile twitched. The smugness cracked just a little.

"I see. You've grown confident."

"No, no, not confident," I said, cracking my neck. "Just tired of seeing the same manipulative bastard get away with everything. Time you get a little taste of karma."

He narrowed his eyes, tone sharpening. "You speak of justice like it's something you own. But you don't understand what it means to reshape the world."

I stepped forward again, voice firm.

"I don't need to reshape the world, Dottore. I just need to stop people like you from screwing it up."

The air buzzed. Tension thick enough to slice with a spoon.

"They say the Harbingers ranked 1 through 3 are the strongest. Maybe even comparable to a god."

I grinned.

"Let's see if you can hold up against someone with real power."

I raised my hand and let the elements rush through me. Anemo, Geo, Electro, Dendro. They danced across my body like a neon rave light show. Lightning cracked at my fingertips. My vision pulsed with raw energy. The ground beneath my feet trembled, whispering of the chaos about to unfold.

"The Fatui can have the Gnosis, but not your way, you stupid fuck."

Dottore laughed. But it wasn't mocking. It was delighted.

"I do like your determination. Let's see what the so-called savior of Teyvat can do."

I smirked, leaning forward so our faces were barely an inch apart. His breath, cold as the abyss, washed over me.

And with that, the earth beneath us shuddered. The skies cracked. And the storm between us... finally ignited.

"Let's dance, blue boy."

____________________

End of Chapter 106

Quests Completed:

*Accidentally reveal you've unlocked Lumine's constellations out of love and overprotectiveness. Try not to sound like a simp and Fail.

*Acknowledge Greg's never-ending shoulder ride. Pretend he's not judging you.

*Dramatically whisper "time to face that bastard" like it's an anime opening.(Unlocks: Shigeru Battle Aura FX)

*Witness Dottore's creepy polite grin and instinctively want to punch it. (Morale shaken. Rage stat buffed.)

*Confront Dottore. Navigate the tension between truth, memory, and identity and finally faces the one behind countless twisted schemes.

* Try to decode Dottore's logic before your brain melts.

*Realize the lizard isn't with you for once. Mild panic. Mild betrayal.

*Endure a villain monologue that sounds both genius and insane. (You listened. You still don't get it. But you nodded like you did.)

Rewards:

* ×150 Primogems (For not punching Dottore immediately. Self-control bonus.)

*×1,500 Adventure EXP (Confronting the past gives a lot of EXP. Who knew?)

*Anemo Sigil ×3 (A stray breeze from Mondstadt carried it your way. No one knows why.)

*Memory Fragment (Key Item) A glowing sliver of memory linked to something Dottore erased… or twisted.

*Greg's Temporary Absence (Status Effect) +10% Focus Boost (You think better when he's not spinning on your head.)

*Teapot Alert Mode: ActivatedA tiny Greg illusion appears and says "I'll bite ankles if you touch our stuff." (Lumine approved.)

*Dottore's Failed Ego Scan Log: A strange device that tried to analyze Shigeru's psyche but imploded from confusion.

*Dramatic Wind Gust Crystal

*Tiny Nahida Sticker Set (x3) (Collectible stickers of chibi Nahida making faces. Use them to prank Lumine.)

*Sick Comeback Token ×1(Spend this to instantly come up with a witty one-liner next time you're speechless.)