Hazbin Hotel: Another Adam

I had some kind of nightmare last night. Not just a bad dream, but a true nightmare, a bone-chilling one. Pain… all-consuming hatred… sticky, suffocating despair… animalistic fear… The worst part was that all these emotions stayed with me even after I woke up.

I didn't remember the details, just fragments of images and those suffocating feelings. But something in me reacted to them. At 5 AM, I literally shot out of bed, adopting a strange combat stance, and my hand, on its own, formed a spear… out of water? For a second, I stared at the shimmering, vibrating weapon in my hand, feeling its density and hidden power. Okay, that was weird as all hell. Since when do I instinctively form water spears instead of my usual beams or blades of pure Light? And what the hell kind of dream did I have to provoke such a reaction?! I don't understand a damn thing… I dispersed the spear, feeling a bit out of sorts.

"Adam? What happened?" Lute's sleepy, alarmed voice pulled me from my stupor. Her tousled blonde head peeked out from under the blanket, her eyes fixed on me with concern. It seemed my abrupt movements had woken her. She looked tired – last night had been quite… active. I don't know where she gets so much insatiability in bed, but she's almost never satisfied with just one round. Though, I'm not against it myself – she's a drop-dead gorgeous girl, after all, and right now, with only a thin blanket covering her, the view was such that I again… Ahem, never mind.

"Sorry for waking you, my sunshine," I forced a guilty smile, approaching the bed. "Just had a nightmare. A really shitty one."

Lute sighed, giving me an attentive, meticulous, and slightly distrustful look. She clearly didn't completely buy my "just a nightmare" excuse but, apparently satisfied that I was okay and there was no danger, she just patted the spot next to her on the bed. I lay down again. She kissed me gently, covered me with the blanket, and pressed her whole body against me, resting her head on my chest and almost immediately started to breathe softly, drifting back to sleep.

She's such a cutie, really. And so trusting…

I settled comfortably on the pillow, one arm around Lute, and tried to fall asleep again, but thoughts were swarming in my head.

What am I, really? I've already figured out that I hold memories not only of Adam but of someone… or something… else. Memories from a past life? Possibly. But this memory is literally locked away from me. If Adam's memories returned on their own, every night, in small portions, and assimilated quite easily, becoming part of my experience (albeit a detached one), then the memory of… me? This Tatsumi? It didn't return. It more like pounced on me, causing wild headaches, phantom sensations, fragments of images, instinctive reactions like that water spear, and other crap.

If this nightmarish dream is going to be pieced together in my memory as slowly and painfully as the previous fragment from that other life, then it will take about a week for me to remember it entirely. A whole week of hazy visions and feeling like shit. Fucking long and unpleasant.

Speaking of Adam's memory. That also brought a surprise. Yes, I now have all his memories of the War with Hell, all the key events, battles, decisions. Which is just wonderful from an informational standpoint. But the "quality" of this memory leaves much to be desired. It's as if I read a dry summary from a history textbook: no emotions, no personal impressions, no tactical details, no sensations from battle. On one hand, this is good – his personality now hardly affects me, doesn't pressure me with its egoism and stubbornness. But on the other… I know the facts, but I don't understand their essence.

For example: I know that Adam defeated Asmodeus in single combat during the war. I remember the result of this battle – Asmodeus was vanquished and forced to sit bound by Light until Lucifer flew in and made a deal with him. But how did the fight go? What techniques were used? What were the enemy's weaknesses? What emotions did Adam himself experience? Nothing. A void. As if I read a line in a chronicle: "Adam defeated Asmodeus." And that's it. I know it happened, but if I try to delve deeper, to find specifics – there's just a blank spot. I even had a wild thought that these memories were some cunning fake, implanted in me by Sera or someone else. But I highly doubt it. Most likely, it's some side effect of my "merging" or the way I obtained the memory.

Alright, I'll postpone these reflections until evening; morning is wiser than the evening, as they say.

Right now, I should think about my plans for the day. Firstly, I need to go train myself. I haven't really tried Stolas's grimoire skills in practice, and theory without practice will be dead weight. It's not like I can train them in the middle of a battle, right? And also… strange thing, but I have a wild urge to try and control water. Just like that. For no apparent reason. There's some irrational desire inside me, a persistent itch – to take control of water, to feel its flow, its power. This is probably also the influence of that dream.

I sigh, carefully pulling Lute closer, who is sleeping so trustingly and serenely beside me. Okay, a couple more hours of napping next to her, and then I'll go train.

Retreat, or the dream that wasn't.

A gray, dead desert stretched all around. The husks of ruined buildings, like skeletons of forgotten giants, reached for the leaden, indifferent sky. The wind chased dust and ash across the cracked earth, getting into eyes and lungs. And we were running through this dying world. Running along a shattered road at such an incredible speed as our exhausted bodies could manage. But the pursuit was not falling behind.

I heard their approaching footsteps, felt their dark, oppressive aura behind us. They were gaining.

"Run… I can't be saved anymore…" a weak, cracked voice of a young girl reached me through the howl of the wind and the thumping of my own heart in my ears. Taya. Her words slashed at my soul sharper than any blade. Resentment, burning fear, helpless hatred, and all-consuming regret overwhelmed me. How did I let this happen? Why wasn't I there for her at that moment? Why couldn't I protect her?! Damn it!!!

"Taya, hang on! Do you hear me?! Everything will be alright!" I rasped, trying to speak confidently, but my voice treacherously trembled. I was carrying her in my arms; her limp body felt like an unbearable weight. My superhuman body was working at its limit, muscles burning, lungs bursting from lack of air, but I knew – it wasn't enough. With her in my arms, I couldn't escape the Executioners. These brutes didn't possess a divine spark like us, but their physical strength and endurance surpassed ours, albeit slightly. They were made for hunting. If only I had my full energy reserve now… at least half…

"Tatsumi… I'm dying…" she coughed, and blood appeared on her pale lips. Dark, thick. Shit, she was pierced through! A through-and-through wound in her chest… Even our enhanced bodies couldn't just survive something like that, especially considering she'd spent almost all her reserves in that damned battle, covering our retreat… Fuck! What a fucking mess! "Just… leave me… and run… save yourselves…"

"Tatsumi, she's right," came the infuriatingly calm voice, as always, of that violet-eyed idiot from behind me. Kai. The son of a bitch chose an incredibly pretentious name for himself; no wonder he was always the most popular among us. "We won't get far like this. She'll just bleed out before we find shelter. We're only delaying the inevitable and risking ourselves."

"Shut up, you bastard!" I roared without turning around. "Piss off wherever you want, save your own skin! I'm not leaving her. You hear me?! Never!" Think, Tatsumi, think, what to do! There has to be some way out! Some goddamn chance of salvation! We can't just die here like this!

At that very moment, my desperate, blind hope was crushed completely.

He…

Plummeting from the sky, landing right in front of us, was the one we feared most. The bastard. The Godkiller. Our greatest mistake. The cause of this whole nightmare.

A tall man with jet-black hair and piercing green eyes, in which a cold fire and hatred for all living things flickered. He was dressed in a stark black attire, resembling a new model military uniform, with a high collar and silver accents. Black gloves on his hands. His entire appearance radiated darkness, overwhelming power, and absolute self-confidence. He stood amidst this ruin, calm and inevitable, like death itself.

"Oh, what a pity… It seems the 'pantheon' of worthless little gods has lost another of its representatives," a crooked, mocking smirk touched his lips as he surveyed the three of us and the dying Taya in my arms. "How sorry I am… I'm almost crying." He was putting on a show, reveling in our despair.

"Scum!!! I'll kill you!!!" Hatred and grief flooded me, blowing the last fuses. I forgot about everything – about conserving energy, about the Executioners behind me, about the hopelessness of the situation. Gathering the pathetic remnants of my internal reserve, every drop of available energy, I formed a spear of my own blood before me – the best catalyst. I twisted it into a tight, vibrating spiral and hurled it at supersonic speed straight at his head. I poured all my pain, all my fury into that strike!

A miss.

The degenerate simply vanished from where he stood and reappeared a couple of meters to the side. Instantaneous movement. Taya's favorite trick. This bastard… he'd already mastered her powers completely! Scum!

"Not a bad try, little water-godling," his voice was even, almost bored. "Quite good. Now learn how it should have really been done." And he began to form an identical spear of water before him; it formed much slower, but it looked an order of magnitude more powerful, denser, deadlier.

Beside me, Kai and Luisa were already preparing for battle – the Lightning God was creating blades of violet lightning, Luisa was forming a barrier of stone walls. They were preparing to fight off both this bastard and the Executioners, who were already very close, their silhouettes growing out of the dusty haze behind me.

The Godkiller had almost finished forming my own technique, clearly intending to demonstrate his superiority. Too bad for him, but… my first strike wasn't so simple.

At the very moment he was ready to throw his water spear, my own spear, the one he had just dodged, sharply reappeared behind him, completely obeying my will even at a distance. It plunged right into his back, between his shoulder blades. Suck on that, you monster!

The spear easily pierced his body through, erupting from his chest in a fountain of dark blood. Straining my powers, I mentally directed the spear that impaled him further, into the crowd of approaching Executioners, and activated the self-destruct program embedded within it. A deafening explosion, like a hydrogen bomb – a blinding flash, a shockwave sweeping away everything in its path. And then I used the last of my energy to drastically change the temperature at the epicenter, instantly freezing those Executioners who had somehow miraculously survived the blast itself.

That was it. Reserve – kaput. I was no longer a fighter.

My legs gave out, and I collapsed to my knees, holding Taya's limp body with my last strength. Fuck… This is all so fucked up… What do I do?! I can't lose her! Not her! Please…

"I'm sorry… kh-kha… I… failed you…" she whispered, her eyes glazing over.

"No… No, Taya, no! It's my fault! Forgive me… forgive me for not protecting you… forgive me…" Tears streamed down my cheeks, mixing with dust and blood.

Her hand weakly squeezed mine, then fell limp. Her breathing stopped. Her eyes turned glassy.

Taya was dead. In my arms.

"Tatsumi, we have to run! Immediately! He'll be back soon!" Kai's voice sounded insistent, pulling me from the depths of grief.

"Shut up! I won't leave her!" I yelled, clutching her body to me. It was all over.

"You will!" Luisa said harshly, approaching me. Her face was pale but resolute. "We can't lose you too! We need you! Get a grip and let's go! Right now!" That damn Frenchwoman! Always so proper and rational! Infuriating!

Kai, meanwhile, approached from the other side. He decided that now would be a fucking great idea to knock me out and drag me away by force. Son of a bitch! I'll get him back for this!

I felt his lightning strike my body, paralyzing my muscles, clouding my consciousness. The last thing that flashed through my mind before darkness engulfed the world was a desperate: "Taya… I'm sorry…"

Yeah, now the picture is clearer. Some fragments of memories had indeed formed into a coherent, albeit nightmarish, picture in my dream. The name "Tatsumi"… the girl Taya… some Kai and Luisa… and that terrifying Godkiller… Water magic… It seems this really is a fragment of my past life. And that life was full of pain and loss. But what world was that? Who were these people? I need time to digest all this.

Lute, by the way, to my surprise, had already left for her morning run. It seems she really decided to give me a break today, didn't wake me. Not that I needed it that badly, but seeing such care from her was damn pleasant. In my past gray life before ending up here, I don't think I had anyone… And here, someone appeared who truly values me and, it seems, even loves me. The only disconcerting thing is that we rarely discuss any deeply personal topics, mostly daily life, training, plans… I should fix that sometime. Maybe really go somewhere "into nature"? Have a picnic? Well, why not, tents, a campfire, an evening by the lake… Romance. I'll have to suggest it to her.

I push these thoughts away, decisively jumping out of bed. Enough moping. Time for action. But first – to blow off some steam. I instantly teleport to the empty exorcist training ground. Making sure no one was really there, I let out a furious scream, simultaneously releasing a huge, dazzling beam of pure Light into the heavens, pouring most of my reserve into this senseless attack. I watch it recede into the distance and feel the tension ease a little. I immediately teleport back to my house, to the kitchen, and sigh heavily.

Sometimes you need to let off steam, even if it looks a bit strange from the outside, but it helps me.

I put the kettle on, take eggs and bacon out of the fridge. Time to make breakfast. Because of Lute, I've gotten into the habit of having fried eggs and bacon for breakfast – she adores it. I wonder if there's some story from her past hidden behind this little quirk of hers too? I'll have to ask her delicately sometime.

I eat breakfast, habitually turning on a guitar lesson video by that boring old guy on my tablet – his monotonous voice was surprisingly calming today. Then I play a little myself, strumming the strings, trying to pick out a melody that had been stuck in my head since the dream – something sad and lingering. Finally, feeling a bit more like myself, I decide to head to the training field for real, to test my new knowledge and abilities.

Alright, now we can start experimenting. Let's begin with the simple stuff, what I've almost mastered from the grimoire: second-level magic – runes and sigils.

I concentrate, creating a complex golden symbol in the air that should raise the temperature. I fill the shining pattern with Light and… Yes! A noticeable shimmer of hot air immediately appears around the magical sigil. I create a glass of water in my hand, bring it closer to the rune – the glass immediately shatters with a soft crack, and the water begins to hiss and boil, evaporating.

Heh, a pocket boiler. Excellent. And now I also know for sure that my body is completely immune to extreme temperatures, at least to those I can create myself. Wonderful.

Next, I spent about an hour testing various runes and sigils from the grimoire – barriers of different strengths, simple spells for enhancement or weakening, seals for traps… Everything worked as described. My angelic nature easily adapted the demonic techniques.

Well then, now let's try to combine the first and second levels, and create an artifact.

I fill the space before me with Light, concentrating it, shaping it into a katana. Yes, a katana again. I don't know where I got these skills in wielding it, this muscle memory, but after the very first training session, I realized I didn't want to switch to another melee weapon yet. There was something familiar about this blade.

The blade of pure white Light glinted with golden sparks. I formed the hilt and scabbard in white with gold inlays.

A beautiful blade. Elegant and deadly.

Now for the magic. I create a complex rune in the air, designed to accumulate and store energy. I concentrate and slowly, carefully "fuse" this rune into the very essence of the light blade, integrating it into its energy structure. It worked! The rune disappeared, but I could feel its presence inside the katana. Let's add a small improvement – the ability to release this energy with a swing, at will. Let's see the result.

I begin to fill the katana with Light, directing the flow of energy from my reserve straight into the blade. 10% of my current maximum… 20%… 30%… 50%… 90%… Damn! I poured almost my entire reserve into it, and it feels like it's only half full! Excellent! A swing, and a huge wave of golden light erupts from the blade, about 5% of my reserve. Quite good.

Actually, ordinary angelic weapons and exorcist armor are also artifacts, and they even have accumulators, though not as capacious. Exorcists use this accumulated energy to enhance their bodies. But my katana with the integrated rune was an order of magnitude more effective.

However, at the moment, I didn't need this katana, even with such a huge accumulator and a built-in Getsuga. So I just dispelled it, carefully reabsorbing all the Light poured into it back into my reserve. By the way, fun fact: if someone like Sera tried to do something similar – take an artifact I created from my Light and absorb its energy – she would most likely fail. She is much more skilled than me in handling Light, but the thing is, this blade was created from my personal Light, my essence. It's like the difference between ocean water and the blood in your veins. Anyone can take water from the ocean, but your blood… only you yourself or someone who kills you. A very strange analogy, thanks to those weird dreams for that. Such is the specificity of "personal" Light for angels and, possibly, Darkness for demons.

And now for the most interesting part. Let's finally try to move to the third level – the level of concepts. It's a pity, of course, that in Paimon's grimoire, most spells of this level used the concept of Cosmos specifically; I would have liked more variety for study. But, on the other hand, cosmos isn't just darkness and void, but also the light of distant stars, the energy of galaxies. So, theoretically, even from my Light, one could try to extract this concept.

Let's begin.

I take a deep breath, concentrating. I gather a sphere of pure Light before me. And then I try to… extract, to filter out from it the very essence, the very idea, the very concept of Infinite Cosmos. And simultaneously, I open a portal, using the technique described in Paimon's grimoire…

It worked! A rift in space opened before me, leading not just to another place, but… to space! I saw myriads of distant stars, nebulae, spiral galaxies… an incredible, breathtaking picture. Only… something was wrong. A feeling of some… artificiality. As if I were looking at a very high-quality, but still, a stage set.

I cautiously stepped into the portal. My feelings were confirmed. I was floating in space, but I felt neither cold nor vacuum. Everything around was permeated with… my Light? I tried to fly to one of the nearest planets – a beautiful gas giant with rings. And… just bumped into an invisible "wall." It seems this was indeed some kind of illusion created by the spell. Or rather, something like a three-dimensional projection created from my energy.

Interesting… But the grimoire described something more. Perhaps it's about the amount of energy invested? Or the quality of the concept extraction?

I tried to return – opened a portal from this "cosmos" and stepped back onto the training field. It worked without problems.

Hmm, what if I supply more Light? Significantly more?

Again, I concentrate, gathering almost all my available reserve. Again, I extract the concept of Cosmos, trying to do it more clearly. And again, I open a portal using the same technique.

Space again. Visually – the same place. But the sensations… different. The air (or whatever replaced it) vibrated with energy. I flew towards that planet again. And this time… there was no "wall"! I calmly flew through the rings, approached the churning atmosphere of the giant. I listened to my sensations… Yes! All this space around – stars, planets, void – was filled with my Light energy, permeated with the purest concept of Cosmos!

This is just incredible! I MYSELF created a separate pocket world, a micro-universe made entirely of my energy! And if the energy here is only mine, then that means…

I concentrated on the planet I was flying past. And… wished to move it. Just to change its position in orbit. And I did it! With enormous effort, with mental strain, but the planet slowly, reluctantly, yet obeyed my will and shifted!

Holy shit… So this is how seraphim created worlds?! Or, at least, this is how it could be done! I found an analogue to their divine ability, which worked if you just infused the energy with the right concept!

My mind reeled from the realization of the opened possibilities.

By the way… Stolas also possessed a similar skill. I remembered a scene from the cartoon where he created an entire dimension for little Octavia, where planets collided to his song. And Lucifer… when he flew with Charlie through some space filled with light and stars, and also sang a song… Hmm…

Don't tell me that this incredible ability, which I considered the prerogative of the strongest, is actually pretty much standard for high-level demons?! What the hell?! Why then aren't angels, even archangels like me, taught this?!

I was having more and more questions for Sera and her policy of refusing my training. Alright, I can understand why she didn't want to train the previous Adam, but there were plenty of more suitable candidates.

What game is she playing? What is she afraid of? Or what is she trying to achieve?

Well, of course, who would explain anything to me; I'm already starting to get used to this feeling of having a ton of questions and no answers in sight.

Alright, since we've dealt with concepts and world creation for now (at least at a basic level), I'll move on to the next spells from the grimoire that I'd like to master and adapt to Light. And then… then we'll see.

I don't even know why I ended up in this world, in this body, with all these foreign and my own memories. I'm not even entirely sure who I really am. But there must be some reason for all this. If there isn't… this reason, this purpose, I will have to invent and find for myself. Because living without a purpose is not life, but mere existence. And I do not intend to merely exist anymore.

Interlude

"Well? Has he made his choice?" A grating, inhuman male voice, devoid of any emotion, rasped.

"He should have. But since he still hasn't fully revealed himself to us, since he isn't seeking the way here… it means his choice will not satisfy us," another voice, female, with a slight hoarseness, replied.

"I told you from the beginning – we should have just killed him there, while he was vulnerable!" a third voice, rough, male, full of old malice, rumbled.

"Oh no. Obtaining our agent in Heaven is far more advantageous than simply killing one of the enemy's 'decent' warriors," a fourth voice, female again, but this time young, clear, almost girlish, though with icy undertones, objected.

"You only say that because he was once your husband!" the rough male voice barked.

"Shut up, you fool! You've proven your brainlessness more than once, Cain! Mind your own business!" the girl cut him off coldly.

A heavy silence fell, broken only by the unseen crackling of the surrounding Darkness.

"Prepare yourselves," the first, grating voice finally said. "Since Adam has made his choice, it's time for us to make our move. Before he has a chance to warn the Seraphim about… us."

Four dark, barely discernible silhouettes silently dissolved into the even denser gloom.