Harmonious Love

Where There Is Sunlight, There Are Shadows (12)

Above all, Mo Yeon didn’t have the confidence to face that handsome face as if nothing had happened.

He thought that during the semester, they would spend much less time together, which would reduce the complexity in his mind. However, not having their time together reduced at all was something Mo Yeon hadn’t anticipated.

Had Tae Young-won always treated his sex partners this way?

Coming to school early, two hours before class, to eat together; ordering strawberry juice for him after meals as if it were the most natural thing; noticing whether he was wearing a watch within a day.

Mo Yeon raised his lowered eyes to glance at Tae Young-won.

“…”

It was fascinating how someone who often played mischievous pranks could sometimes have such a gaze.

Tae Young-won was looking at Mo Yeon with curiosity as he rested his head more quietly than usual. The touch caressing his cheek and hair had no roughness to it.

At times like this, it felt as if insignificant Mo Yeon had become someone precious to Tae Young-won.

“You’re being agreeable again today.”

“…”

“When you’re like this, I can’t help but touch you more often.”

Even while teasing, his gaze remained the same. Though it seemed like he was making fun, Mo Yeon couldn’t bring himself to tell him to stop.

He was thinking he wanted the touching to continue. The moment Tae Young-won noticed this, Mo Yeon spoke up.

“Stop now.”

“Your mood swing over?”

Contrary to his true feelings, Mo Yeon nodded. When he shook his head as if to shake off the hand, it was withdrawn more easily than expected. Tae Young-won grinned and muttered.

“Thanks to you, I got my fill of affection in public.”

Is this how everyone normally acts?

Mo Yeon had never had a partner before or been in a relationship, so he couldn’t tell if this was normal. Already lacking in experience with people, Mo Yeon had encountered countless firsts since meeting Tae Young-won.

As such, Tae Young-won had become a reference point for Mo Yeon in many unknown areas.

“Did sunbae always do this before?”

He didn’t need to think about other people. What mattered was whether sex partners were always like this to Tae Young-won.

He was more affectionate and natural now, after they had a big fight and broke up, than when they were forced to date. So if Tae Young-won had been like this with others from the beginning, he was just acting as he usually did.

If not…

‘Maybe he’s accommodating me because I said I didn’t want things to change…’

No matter how much he thought about it, that was the only conclusion he could reach. Following one thought after another, Mo Yeon absently concluded:

Either way, it would probably hurt more and more as time passed.

“What are you suddenly talking about?”

“Just, the things you do. Like just now.”

“Just now? What did I do?”

Tae Young-won asked with genuine confusion. The momentary frown was not fabricated, even if he was skilled at controlling his expressions.

“What… don’t you even know what you did just now?”

When Mo Yeon snapped at him out of irritation, Tae Young-won seemed to start seriously thinking. After blinking several times, he spoke without much confidence.

“Honestly, I was wondering if your nipples were hard, but that wasn’t noticeable, was it?”

“What did you say?”

“Isn’t it getting a bit cold out here? We’re drinking cold juice too. If your nipples are hard, want to go inside?”

“What, what…”

How could he turn “are you cold now” into a question like that? At a loss for words, Mo Yeon hesitated before quickly turning his head away.

“It’s nothing.”

“What were you suddenly curious about? So, are your nipples hard?”

“Please.”

“Is that why you told me to stop touching you earlier? Because you were getting excited?”

Sometimes it seemed like even he got confused about what he was saying. First he asked if Mo Yeon’s nipples were hard because of the cold, and now he was suggesting it was from excitement.

Just in case, Mo Yeon hunched his shoulders slightly.

“It wasn’t really like that before, but now that I’m talking about it, you’re becoming conscious of it, right?”

“…”

His subtle voice was irritating. Mo Yeon kept his gaze fixed outside the terrace and deliberately spoke firmly.

“No. I’m not excited at all.”

“Liar.”

“…”

“Mo Yeon gets excited just from talking like this.”

That was only because he kept being so explicit that his body started to react a little. Mo Yeon was definitely not excited. Looking now, his nipples did seem to be erect under his clothes. But that was because Mo Yeon was especially sensitive, not because it happened just from hearing Tae Young-won’s words.

“There’s 15 minutes left until class.”

When Mo Yeon stubbornly said this, Tae Young-won snickered. As his laughter continued for a while, Mo Yeon’s face burned.

“Should we both skip? They’re lenient on the first day anyway.”

This wasn’t the first time he’d been treated this way.

“You’re like that bad older brother in the neighborhood. You know, the delinquent who corrupts innocent kids—there’s one in every neighborhood.”

A moment of silence passed. Then Tae Young-won’s response was quite a sight.

“That sounds fun. Want to try it when we get home?”

“…Try what?”

When Mo Yeon glanced at him suspiciously, he realized Tae Young-won’s eyes were already gleaming. It seemed he had already begun to let his imagination run wild.

“Mo Yeon is an innocent, pure honor student who knows nothing… but I, a year older, move in next door and you start learning bad things one by one. We could even have secret sex with the door open when your family is home. Wouldn’t that be really fun?”

“No? It doesn’t sound fun at all.”

What fun? Just thinking about it made his heart pound as if he’d committed a sin.

“Later when you cry because your grades dropped, that would be really cute. You’d say, ‘My mom told me not to play with hyung on weekends anymore.’ Honestly, I think I could still seduce Mo Yeon again. I might feel a little hurt, but…”

At that point, Mo Yeon shook his head vigorously, pretending not to have heard.

His reaction seemed to encourage Tae Young-won, who continued to tease Mo Yeon persistently afterward. Was he really a sunbae several years older?

‘Huh?’

As Mo Yeon continued to ignore Tae Young-won, his eyes suddenly widened. When he casually turned his gaze outside the terrace, he saw a familiar face.

Was it Kim Hyun-soo? The one he had met that time…

There were very few people at school who could recognize Mo Yeon immediately upon seeing his face. Still, it seemed that people he’d met outside once had somehow been imprinted in his mind without him realizing.

‘Come to think of it, I should pay him back for the drinks.’

For whatever reason, Kim Hyun-soo had been very happy to meet someone from school in that setting. Honestly, Mo Yeon hadn’t been happy at all, but thanks to Kim Hyun-soo, he had been able to stay there a little longer that day.

He thought their eyes met briefly, but it was probably his imagination. After all, he had spotted him from quite far away. Mo Yeon turned his head back.

By now, Tae Young-won was resting his chin on his hand, staring at Mo Yeon.

“But if something like that had actually happened, my mom probably wouldn’t have cared much.”

If it had been during high school, that would have been when Mo Yeon had become a completely vague presence to his family. Even before that, except for occasional trouble at school, he had grown up receiving only material support. After he had grown up, he had simply existed, barely noticed both at home and at school, focusing only on studying. Of course, now wasn’t the time to talk about such things.

“Really?”

“I’ve never been pressured by my family about grades. If we had met then, I probably would have had even less self-control than now. Since I was younger.”

After quietly staring at Mo Yeon, the corners of Tae Young-won’s lips curved smoothly.

“Then we would have played more recklessly, huh?”

“I suppose so.”

As Mo Yeon nodded calmly, the corners of Tae Young-won’s lips curved smoothly.

“I wish we had met earlier. Not just for that reason, of course.”

“…”

“Honestly, I’m really satisfied these days. I’ve never felt this way before, so it’s quite fascinating.”

He meant he wished they had become partners earlier. From Mo Yeon’s perspective, he did seem excessively satisfied with their relationship.

Additionally, not having to put on airs must be satisfying too. He seemed tired of living a life wearing masks.

Of course, Mo Yeon had also thought countless times about meeting earlier. If they had met sooner, maybe he would have stolen yang energy more fearlessly. And found other alternatives sooner too.

But in every imagined scenario that branched out, Mo Yeon always loved Tae Young-won.

The simultaneous thought was that loving him was inevitable for Mo Yeon.

Just as he had been driven by the instinct to survive, this would have happened no matter when they met.

That was a truth Mo Yeon couldn’t entirely welcome.