Chapter 49: 49: What It Means to Follow Your Heart
When was the last time he went shopping with a girl?
At least two years ago, right?
Watching Nanami pick out kitchenware, Akira mused silently.
Two years ago—that would've been during his first year after transmigrating.
At the time, Akira was still reeling from the sudden upheaval in his life, clueless about how to handle the money that had suddenly become just numbers.
After buying and renovating his current house, without any concrete dreams, he could only try to "enjoy life," and found himself lost in the dazzling neon lights.
In the intoxication of song and wine, there was utmost tenderness and submission that made one feel like an ancient emperor.
In the thrill of chips and cards colliding, there was heart-pounding excitement—whether falling into hell or ascending to heaven.
In the flow of mountains and rivers, there were elegant moments to cleanse the heart of noise and sorrow.
In the solemnity of shrines and temples... Akira had crashed into one, just to see how strong he really was.
He'd had "girlfriends"—of course, the kind that were after his looks and money.
Terms were agreed upon before things started, and breakups were peaceful when interest waned.
Since he was always the first to lose interest, a breakup fee had to be added.
Shopping back then wasn't for groceries or daily supplies—it was in the high-end luxury fashion area.
Maybe it was because he was a transmigrator, but he always had a surreal sense of disconnection from this world.
Once the initial shock and novelty wore off, Akira began to find it all meaningless. Only then did he start to settle down.
Ironically, it was in fictional games that he found a sense of reality.
Because games were fake by nature, playing them became a very real act.
Besides... with budgets in the hundreds of millions of dollars, armies of engineers, scenario writers, and years of meticulous planning, even games that weren't top-tier AAA titles—just quirky creations from indie studios—often dazzled with their ingenuity.
If not for the need to eat, what gaming enthusiast wouldn't want to play games for a lifetime?
That was the main reason he bid for a transaction when he first saw Utaha.
To most people, she was just a gorgeous, talented literary prodigy—undeniably attractive, but that was all.
But to Akira, that "something only I can see" quality hit him like a truck.
Yet, it also reminded him too much of his initial foray into the neon night—once the novelty wore off, who knew what remained underneath?
He had no plans to marry or have kids, and didn't want the responsibility of "post-conquest maintenance."
Nor did he want to be some scumbag who used coercion or trickery to get what he wanted—his moral compass wasn't that crooked.
What he pursued wasn't indulgence in momentary lust, but a state of mental clarity and freedom—true desire unshackled, not impulse tainted with regret.
So when the moment felt right, he proposed the transaction and was willing to put in some effort to make it happen—but whether it succeeded or not, he left it up to fate.
Just like now—it was entirely a laissez-faire situation.
As for whether taking someone's body counts as being a scumbag... honestly, yes.
After all, she had been pure. But if the other party was okay with it, and wouldn't be left with pain or scars, Akira didn't feel too burdened.
At most, he'd offer some compensation.
"Mr. Ogiwara, I think we're about done."
Pushing a fully loaded shopping cart, Nanami's eyes were brighter than usual—and also more nervous.
It had been ages—no, it was probably the first time in her life that she spent money so freely. It was a bit thrilling for her.
Little did she know, even more shocking things were yet to come.
Snapping out of his thoughts, Akira looked at the cart full of goods and, for the first time, felt like he was really living a daily life.
The reason he came along was because they had a lot to buy today—and quite a variety of items too.
Even though Nanami was a highly-paid maid, Akira didn't have the heart to make a recently recovered girl do everything on her own.
Besides, he wanted to relive the feeling of shopping with a girl. He'd already been planning on it when he had coffee with Utaha, but the crowd at Rokutenma supermarket that day was just too much.
Strictly speaking, today didn't really count either. After all, this was a purposeful home shopping trip, and he hadn't expected it to stir up memories from so long ago.
"All done? Then let's go home."
Akira turned and walked toward the checkout.
Nanami pushed the cart and followed, cautiously observing him.
While picking items earlier, she'd accidentally noticed Akira spacing out, and how that sense of detachment grew more and more pronounced the longer he did.
He always struck her as a mysterious person, but detachment and transcendence weren't quite the same.
She couldn't describe the exact difference, nor was she sure it wasn't just her imagination—but the feeling stuck.
As a maid, shouldn't caring about your master's mood be part of the job?
After paying and leaving the supermarket section, they were still inside the mall, surrounded by various stores. After a brief look around, Nanami suddenly had an idea.
"If we're not in a rush, let's take a short break, Mr. Ogiwara. There are seats over here."
Akira wasn't in a hurry to get home, and assumed the still-recovering Nanami might be tired. He casually sat down.
But after pushing the cart over, Nanami didn't sit down. Instead, she dashed into an ice cream shop.
They'd first met at an ice cream stall—her behind the counter, him in front. Compared to that street stall, this shop was much more refined—and much pricier.
With a bit of heartache, Nanami pulled out her wallet and ordered two cones—one she liked, and one vanilla.
She wasn't sure of Akira's preferences, but since he'd ordered vanilla back then, it felt like a safe choice.
Carrying both cones, Nanami returned quickly and handed the vanilla one to Akira.
He didn't say thank you. Instead, he stared absentmindedly at the pale color of the vanilla and the crushed peanuts on top.
This made Nanami anxious. She asked softly, "Mr. Ogiwara... do you not like this?"
Akira looked up, gave her a slightly strange glance, and took a bite of the ice cream.
Cold, sweet, and the peanut crunch was fragrant.
And the timing... was just too perfect.
"You paid for this yourself?"
"...Eh? How did you know?"
"When we get back, give yourself an advance on half a month's salary. I don't want to hear that my maid skipped meals to buy ice cream—it'd damage my image."
"Hehe, it's fine! I saved up a bit from all those part-time jobs earlier."
"Enough nonsense. Just do it. Also, starting tomorrow, you're going to this place for training. Come back in the afternoon to cook dinner for me."
He pulled out his phone and sent an address to Nanami.
She looked at the name at the end—Shinomiya Estate—and tilted her head. "Is this a maid training center?"
"Just treat it as such. But remember, you can perform courtesy bows according to protocol, but you never need to truly bow your head to anyone."
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