Aliens and Dates

I hate Mondays.

Don't laugh, alright? Mondays, in my personal view, are like a socially acceptable form of torture. Especially since they come right after family Sundays (another form of torture, let's be honest), and just before Tuesday, which is officially the day of the week when everything goes wrong for me.

Oh, you don't believe me?

First: I was born in the early hours of a Monday.

Second: Two of the best friends I ever had in my life left my hometown on a Monday. That was also when I found out they had been stabbing me in the back for ages —badmouthing me andspreading rumors about me to other members of my family (most of whom I hate, but still??). It was like one of those over-the-top teen movie betrayals.

Guess what day of the week I found out about it? Yep, you guessed it: Tuesday, because not everything terrible happens on Mondays.

Third: I got fired from the best job I ever applied for on that infernal day.

Fourth: During a temp job in college—where I was more of a lackey for my superiors than actually doing what was in my contract—Mondays were always the worst. It was delivery day. The day I had to run around like a headless chicken, buy coffee for my bosses (out of MY paycheck), and sign so many documents that my wrist would ache by the end of the day.

Yeah, my teenage years weren't exactly a bed of roses, but considering I'm still alive today, I'd say that's a win of sorts.

What was I saying again? Oh, right! Mondays! Focus, Quinzel! Damn it, pay attention to what you're saying!

Man, why is it so hard for me to stay on one topic? I'm pretty sure there's something in my brain, like a little ant running back and forth, rearranging things however it pleases.I don't like that little ant very much, to be honest.

Anyway! Back to the point. I hate Mondays because of the concept, you know? Can't we justskip from Saturday to Wednesday? I don't like family Sundays either, mostly because they'realways calling me the spawn of Satan just because I got a few tattoos while blackout drunk (shit decision; kids, don't be like me!), smoked some weed as a teenager, and almost—almost!—killed one of my uncles at Christmas dinner.

What? Sure, he's technically part of my DNA in this universe, but that bastard harassed several girls in the family at gatherings. He even hit an assistant once—I saw it closely.

Okay, maybe I should have stopped him less dramatically, and sure, grabbing a piece of pipe and hitting him until he stopped moving wasn't the best idea I've ever had, but who hasn't thought about doing something like that, right?

Right? Anyone? I'm right, right?

Fuck it, your opinions don't matter to me anyway.

— "We're still here" — I heard Bruce Banner's voice faintly, as if it was muffled behind a wall.

I've always had a hard time (read a lot of trouble) paying attention during most interrogations, especially with Batman himself. Still, despite my usual struggles, I managed to focus on Banner'swords. 

I turned to look at him, making a face that was probably ridiculously childish, then shifted my gaze back to the nearly-destroyed wall of Stark Tower.

— "Can I go home now?"

— "The question I ask myself every morning when I wake up hungover." — Tony Stark, obviously.

— "No, you can't" — Natasha Romanoff replied, her voice firm and unmistakably irritated, likely from fighting off those hideous aliens.

I don't blame her. I wasn't exactly thrilled about ruining a dress either.

A rented dress.

I'm so screwed. It's official.

— "We need to know where she came from and how she handled the aliens so well.

Someone get something useful out of her, and quickly!" — The guy with the black eyepatch, clearly trying to channel some dark knight energy, barked at Captain Rogers with zero amusement in his voice. Still, it was easy to see how tired he looked. Maybe his exhaustion was more mental than physical, but it was obvious.

I think I'd prefer being interrogated by Stark—at least he has a decent sense of humor.

— "Thanks, blondie." — I try.

But did I turn off the oven before I left the house?

Discord: https://discord.gg/6bhmTrCgpq

Recruitment:

Positions are paid.

Translator: Translate Spanish, Portuguese, Korean, Japanese, Chinese and French. To English.

Proofreader: Proofread and correct the translation (grammar, punctuation, etc.).

Experience is not mandatory. 

In case you are interested, we are also training for the positions of editors (Typper), translators, and Manhwa cleaners.

1 advanced chapters on Patreon.

Patreon (+1): Azeneth2523