4 LOVERS

The sky was nearly pitch black by the time I got back to the bar. The walls of the city streets looked colder than usual, and each of my footsteps echoed with a shadow that lingered beneath me. Tonight's training with Arven left more than just physical exhaustion—my body trembled, not from magic... but from something else that happened in the final seconds we were together.

That kiss.

The kiss I didn't fully return, but also didn't fully reject. I felt guilty—especially about one person.

Louise.

I pushed the bar door open slowly. It was dark. Not the usual clinking bottles or Louise's tired breathing behind the shelves. I called out quietly.

"Louise...?"

No response.

My steps felt heavy as I climbed the stairs. Maybe he's asleep, I thought. But when I opened my bedroom door—a room I usually only used to sleep in peace—what I saw made my heart stop for a second.

Louise.

Sitting on my bed. Hunched forward with his hands clasped, but his eyes locked straight on me. That gaze was cold. Stormy. Unlike anything I'd seen from him.

I held my breath. "You... were waiting for me?"

He didn't answer. Just slowly stood up. His tall frame loomed, casting shadows across the wall. He stepped closer—one slow step at a time—until only a breath separated us.

"Did you... see it?" I whispered.

Louise didn't respond right away. But his eyes—yeah, his eyes said everything. Too much. When he finally spoke, his voice felt like a dull knife pressing into my chest.

"You kissed him."

I shook my head fast. "No! I mean, I—he kissed me. But I..."

"...didn't push him away."

Thud.

I lowered my head. "I'm confused, Lou. I... I don't even know who I am yet, and Arven... he feels like a clue to the part of me I've lost."

"And what am I?" he whispered. "I'm the one who pulled you from the dirt. I'm the one who's loved you since the first time I saw you collapsed in that flower shop alley."

"I know... I know that," I said softly. "I'm grateful for everything, Lou. But I also need to understand what's happening to me."

Suddenly, Louise pulled me into a hug. It wasn't the usual kind of hug. Not warm or comforting. It was like a fire barely holding itself back from burning everything.

He pulled me close until I was pressed up against his chest. His breath was hot and harsh against my cheek. One hand gripped the back of my neck, forcing me to stay close. That look in his eyes... held me tighter than any spell.

"I've held myself back long enough, Airi..." he murmured, his voice low and husky like a flame about to ignite. "But seeing another man touch your lips—that made me wanna burn the world down."

I opened my mouth to speak, but all that came out was a shaky breath when he leaned down and touched my lips gently. The touch was soft, but my body jolted like heat had flooded from the base of my neck to my fingertips.

"L-Louise..." I whispered, my body trembling all over.

"Tell me to stop... and I will, Airi," he said in that dark, tender tone. His eyes were half shadowed, half broken. "But don't lie to yourself."

He started tracing the line of my jaw with his lips. That touch... pulled a soft gasp out of me before I could stop it.

"Aah… wait…"

His hand slipped around my back, pulling me even closer, while the other ran along my upper arm—clutching me like I was made of glass. But my body was already burning from his warmth.

"Lou... you're too close," I moaned, but it didn't sound like a protest.

My body was a mess of confusion, and my heart pounded like it would explode. I could feel his breath on my neck, his lips brushing my oversensitive skin.

"Your voice... drives me crazy," he whispered.

His hand slipped under my shirt, touching the cold skin of my stomach. I shivered, another soft moan escaping.

"Uuh… aah…"

I clenched his shirt, my head dropping. "Don't make me feel like this… I…"

"What?"

I bit my lip, then almost cried out, "I'm a guy, Louise! I'm not a girl… even if I look like this!"

Everything froze.

Louise stopped everything, but he didn't back off. He looked me in the eye, his face calm. But his eyes… his eyes held more than lust—there was pain, truth, and love too deep to hide.

"Airi…" he said softly. He lifted my face gently, making me look at him. "I've known you're a guy from the start. And from the start... I knew I loved you."

"Don't joke," my voice trembled. "You're just... jealous. You don't like me being close to Arven. That's it."

"If it was just jealousy, I could've yelled, left, ignored you. But I'm still here. And I still held you even after you turned me down," he said firmly.

I couldn't speak. My eyes stung.

"You know how many nights I've woken up thinking about you? When you're sick, when you're asleep, even when you smile at someone else—I've been holding myself back, because I know you need time."

He grabbed my hand and placed it on his chest.

"Feel this. My heart's beating because of you. Not for who you are on the outside... but who you are inside."

I held my breath. It felt like every wall inside me was crashing down.

Louise leaned in again. But this time, there was no blazing lust. His gaze was deeper, his hands softer. He touched my face like I was sacred.

"If you're still scared... I'll wait. But if you want to know what it feels like to be loved... not just in your heart, but in your body…"

He didn't finish that sentence. Just leaned forward and rested his forehead against mine, waiting. Not pushing. Not rushing.

I... didn't know what to do. But my body moved on its own.

I closed my eyes and kissed him.

That kiss—different from any before. Not rushed. Not explosive. But deep. Warm. And so damn intimate. My breath hitched, then spilled out in one long sigh mixed with a soft moan.

"Mmm… aah…"

Louise pulled me gently until I was lying on the bed, my back hitting the mattress. He leaned over me slowly, his hands never leaving me. But this time... I didn't resist.

Another soft sound slipped from me. And this time, I didn't stop it.

"Uhh... Lou…"

"Don't hold back. Let me hear you…"

I couldn't hide the sounds anymore. Every kiss on my neck, every brush on my waist—made my breath turn into soft, helpless moans.

Louise's hands traced my jawline, my neck, my chest... all with movements tender and full of yearning. No roughness. Just worship.

My shirt was half-open. He touched my skin and kissed my shoulder slowly. I whimpered, my own voice sounding... too real even to me.

"Nghh… mmn…"

I arched my back, reaching for more, my body chasing his warmth like instinct. Louise grabbed my hand and laced his fingers through mine.

"I want you to know, Airi... I don't want your body because you're pretty. I want you because... you're my home."

My tears fell. But I still looked at him, a small trembling smile on my lips.

And as the night went on, our bodies locked in endless embraces, those sounds—moans, shaky breaths, whispered names—filled the room with a heat words could never describe.

But before anything went too far... I grabbed his face and whispered.

"Louise… stop here…"

He looked into my eyes, then nodded slowly.

"Alright. I'm content... as long as I know you're mine."

I nodded. My breath was still shaky, my face flushed, my body still trembling from everything that just happened. But my heart... somehow felt lighter.

Louise pulled the blanket over me, tucking me in slowly before wrapping his arms around me from behind. His chin and lips rested on my shoulder.

And in that embrace... I knew I was loved. Not for how I looked. But for who I was inside.