The God of Calamity’s Wife

Sirius finished loading up his old pickup truck and shut the back with a clank just as Madeleine and her husband pulled into the gravel driveway. 

"Hey thanks for coming on such a short notice!" He said as he waved at Brimir when he got out. The two of them headed into the house. Madeleine walked around her car to the back seat and unbuckled the two year old that waited for her. 

He was in the middle of eating a hamburger and had sticky fingers. She wiped his hands off before scooping him up and placing him on her hip. She grabbed his diaper bag and went into the house. He was now enjoying a bottle and she set him down amongst a bunch of toys so he could watch as the men chatted away casually. Then she set the bag down and opened the fridge to grab a snack.

"Where is Saoirse at?" She asked as she pulled out a piece of meatloaf and scooped it onto a plate. She squeezed some ketchup onto it and stuck it in the microwave. 

"Why are you always raiding other people's fridge's!?" Brimir said to her as he watched. 

Sirius paused what he was talking about and pointed to the back door. "She's out in the barn." 

"Ok, watch Mathew for me ok?" 

Brimir nodded and resumed chatting as she took her plate outside with her and went to search for her friend. 

Saoirse was surrounded by a bunch of chickens that were busy pecking corn on the ground around her as she milked a cow. As she approached, Saoirse looked up. "Hey Maddy." 

"Hey." 

Madeleine sat on a hay bale and began spooning the meat into her mouth. 

Saoirse scolded at her playfully, "You were supposed to wait for dinner to have some of that!" 

She spooned another bite into her mouth and smiled a guilty look. "C'mon I smelled it the moment I pulled up. I'll just have another slice later; there's no harm in that!" 

"How's your grandson?" She said referring to Mathew's father.

"He's good. He's doing a semester abroad. He got a good scholarship for a law degree in Greece at the Eschaton Institute."

Saoirse nodded. "That's great!"

"Yeah, I'll be watching Mathew for the next 5 years I think, but he will be back for the holidays." 

"I'm glad that there are universities now for the criptids. I wish Alastor was more open to participating. Vampires are so old school." 

Madeleine nodded. "So you guys wanted to talk to us about something?" 

Saoirse nodded. "Yeah, we can talk about it in the house though." 

"Ok." 

The two of them finished feeding the pigs and then they went in. The air outside had grown a bit chilly as it was nearing fall and the warm air greeted them. Madeleine hugged herself. "Ah! It's always so warm in your guys' house I wish I had a heater as good as yours!" She said elbowing Saoirse with a playful smile. She was referring to Sirius who always had a naturally warm aura. 

Brimir shouted at her, "Hey! Why do you always have to make flirty jokes about the prince? He's your superior I hope you know!" 

"I like you getting jealous!" She laughed. "Now where can I help?" 

Saoirse was setting the table. "I'm about done, if you want to bring Mathew over, you can serve him a plate."

She nodded and smiled as she went to find her husband. She yelled over to him since he was in the other room, "Brimir, where is my great grand baby?" 

"I thought you took him outside with you!" He shouted back. 

Madeleine's black swirly aura got a bit sharper as she heard this. She stormed out of the dining room and into the kitchen where the men were hanging out. "I told you to watch him!" She shouted. 

"No you didn't!" He defended himself. 

"Yes I did! Gaaaa!!!! You're so frustrating sometimes! He's not even our baby!" She shouted as she went into the living room to see if he was still there. He wasn't, so she went into Saoirse and Sirius' room.

He was in the master bathroom, playing in the toilet. 

"Mathew! Oh no!!!!" She exclaimed in an upset tone. Sirius came running to see what he had gotten into and the sight before him was one of toilet paper pieces torn off and draped over everything, Shampoo dumped in the tub, and the rest of the toilet paper roll was tossed in the toilet still intact. 

Little pieces floated in the water as Mathew had a toothbrush in each fist and was in the middle of stirring the toilet paper mess as if it were a science experiment. 

He was all wet and had taken off his diaper and smeared poop on the floor and his face. 

He looked at them with a huge grin as they found him and dropped the toothbrushes into the toilet and giggled excitedly asking to be picked up. 

Madeleine came into the room. "Oh Brimir!!!! Oh my… BRIMIR!!!!!"

He came running, "did you find him?" 

"You were supposed to be watching him!" She said angrily. 

Sirius was standing in between two angry wendigos now and their eyes were lit up like flames. Nobody wanted to really deal with the mess Mathew had made, even Saoirse stood in the doorway, the poop smell making her want to vomit.

(To be fair, that's what you get when you feed a baby wendigo a hamburger.)

"I can give him a bath it's no problem!" Sirius piped up, interrupting Madeleine's argument with Brimir.

Madeleine sighed, "You don't have to do that, I can do it." She went to pick him up but he clung to Sirius' leg. 

"I want Siri." He said stubbornly. 

Sirius scooped him up, ignoring the mess he was covered in but careful not to get it on himself. He removed Mathew's shirt and turned on the shower to spray him off.

He giggled playfully as the warm water tickled him under the armpits and on his belly. Sirius sprayed his arms and back and and once he was clean, he finished by lathering up his hair. "Ok! Here comes the water!" He exclaimed and covered Mathew's eyes as he rinsed him off. "Aaahhhh!!!!" Mathew protested. 

"Ok all done!" He scooped him up again, this time wrapping him in a towel and brought him into the bedroom to look for something to put on him. 

Pulling a big t-shirt with a picture of an airplane on it over his head, he smiled as he carefully pulled his little arms through the sleeves and then raised him in the air and pretended to fly him like a plane towards the kitchen. Mathew made a landing in the high chair that Madeleine had brought and then Sirius buckled him in. 

Madeleine smiled at this, but she didn't say anything. Sirius had decided not to have children despite being so warm towards them, and she knew it was a difficult subject so instead she apologized for the destroyed bathroom. "I'm sorry about that." Madeleine said finally, "I'll pay you guys for the toothbrushes." 

"Don't worry about it. Saoirse keeps new ones in a cupboard, we can clean it up." 

"Ok." 

He went and sat next to Saoirse and prepared himself for the conversation ahead. "Now even though we invite you guys all of the time, we did invite you guys to talk about something important."