One Piece: Take the Uchiha Clan to the Grand Line

— — — — — 

Whoosh! Whoosh!

Two masked Anbu, their faces hidden behind cat-like masks, appeared at the entrance of the barbecue restaurant.

"Uchiha Kitaro, Uchiha Shisui, Uchiha Itachi. The Third Hokage requests your presence. Please come with us."

"Sorry, guys," Kitaro said to Kakashi and Guy, grinning. "Duty calls. The Hokage needs us. Oh, and by the way, we didn't bring money this time—next meal's on me!"

With that, Kitaro left with Shisui and Itachi, following the Anbu.

"Sigh... They shouldn't have come back," Kakashi murmured, shaking his head. Despite everything, he had deep respect for his old classmate, Uchiha Kitaro. Back in their academy days, Kitaro was a living legend—a prodigy among prodigies.

Kakashi, often called a genius himself, knew better than anyone: in the presence of Uchiha Kitaro, no one else could claim the title.

"Yeah," Guy chimed in, nodding solemnly. "They shouldn't have returned."

Guy, who had always considered Kakashi his eternal rival, never dared to include Kitaro in that competition. Kitaro wasn't just talented—he was monstrous, someone no amount of hard work could rival. And to make matters worse, he worked just as hard as Gai, if not harder.

"Do you think the higher-ups will move against them again?" Guy asked, his brows furrowed.

Kakashi thought for a moment before shaking his head. "Unlikely. At least not publicly. The higher-ups are probably terrified of him. Kitaro's not called a god for nothing. If he went all out, he could level this entire village."

"Such a waste," Guy muttered, clenching his fists. "With that kind of strength..."

"That's exactly why they fear him," Kakashi replied, his tone grim. "The darkness hidden within Konoha's leadership is far deeper than it looks." His hand subconsciously moved to touch his Sharingan-covered left eye.

— — —

Following the Anbu, Kitaro arrived at the Hokage's office.

At the door, the Anbu halted Shisui and Itachi, letting only Kitaro through.

Since discovering Shisui's ability to manipulate others' will silently, the Third Hokage had been wary of meeting him in person.

Creak.

Kitaro pushed open the door and walked in.

"Ah! Kitaro, my boy!" the Third Hokage exclaimed, beaming like a doting grandfather. "It's been so long! Where have you been? You disappeared so suddenly—I was worried sick about you!"

Kitaro matched the Hokage's enthusiasm, his face lighting up with an exaggerated grin. "Oh, Third Hokage! I missed you to death—wait, no! I mean, I missed you so much!"

"You cheeky brat," the Hokage chuckled, shaking his head. "Still as mischievous as ever. You were always the most troublesome one in the academy. But enough jokes—your sudden disappearance caused us a lot of trouble."

"No way!" Kitaro gasped dramatically. "I've been a good boy since I was a kid. Those rumors? Lies! Defamation! It's all the work of Iwagakure and Kumogakure—they can't beat me, so they resort to dirty tricks."

The Third Hokage's smile twitched, his eyes narrowing slightly. This little fox hasn't changed one bit.

Meanwhile, Kitaro's inner thoughts raced. This old schemer—he's getting better at pretending with age.

"So," the Hokage began, his tone softening, "where did the Uchiha clan disappear to?"

"Ah, about that," Kitaro replied, shrugging nonchalantly. "Well, the pressure from the higher-ups got a little too intense. They smeared our name and squeezed us dry. Naturally, some folks in the clan weren't happy and started talking about overthrowing Konoha's 'barbaric and oppressive' regime.

"To prevent Konoha from turning into a war zone, I sent them all far away. Disaster averted! I mean, honestly, I deserve a medal for that one. Maybe even—dare I say it—the title of Fifth Hokage? What do you think, Third Hokage? Ready to retire and pass the hat to me?"

COUGH COUGH COUGH!

The Third Hokage nearly choked on air. "N-No, that won't be necessary. I'm still in good health, you see—plenty of years left in me."

Kitaro smirked but didn't press further. This old guy clings to power like a leech.

His thoughts turned darker. The Fourth Hokage? Just a puppet. A powerful one, sure, but easily manipulated by this guy's 'Will of Fire' rhetoric. When Minato was alive, the Third controlled everything behind the scenes, using him as a shield against critics.

And when Minato died? The Third stepped back in, playing the reluctant hero who "had no choice but to return."

Of course, there were others who could've taken the mantle—people like Orochimaru.

But conveniently, the Third Hokage exposed Orochimaru's experiments right after Minato's death. Experiments that had been going on for years with funding from Danzo. There's no way he didn't know. But Orochimaru wasn't controllable, so he took him out.

That betrayal? The root of Orochimaru's hatred. It's why he tried to destroy Konoha during the Chunin Exams.

And what about Jiraiya? The Third's star student had seen through his teacher's true nature. To avoid any suspicion of ambition, Jiraiya deliberately stayed far away, wandering the world.

As for Tsunade, she left Konoha for her own reasons. Sure, her hemophobia played a role, but the deeper issue was her status. Being the granddaughter of the First Hokage gave her unrivaled prestige. If she'd stayed, Minato might never have become the Fourth Hokage.

This village, Kitaro thought bitterly, is a web of lies and schemes.

.

.

.